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Wasn't Fair

The rain comes down
Pouring from the sky
It beads through his bangs
Falls in his eyes
Mixes with the tears
Coursing down his face
They fall and they fall
He won’t wipe them away
He asks me why
I say I don’t know
I turn to leave
He begs me not to go
His hands on my shoulders
A familiar sensation
It throws a vicious variable
In this mindboggling equation
I don’t turn back to him
I don’t even dare
If I did I couldn’t deny
How much I’ll always care
He says he still loves me
He swears he always will
I can’t help but snap back
We’ve learned that love kills
That shuts him up quick
I knew that it would
It wasn’t fair to say that
I can’t believe I could
I’m sorry, I whisper
He just turns away
I’ve brought back the memory
Of that terrible day
When I told him I’d lost myself
That love had killed who I’d been
That I couldn’t stay away
From the monster that wasn’t him
It was only once, I whispered
And too many times
His voice is like a razor
You cheated too many times
Now I know I can’t leave him
I can’t walk away
I have to try to erase the pain
From that awful day
When he saw me kiss another
And hold a hand that wasn’t his
We were never the same
For weeks we didn’t kiss
He didn’t touch me
He didn’t speak
I apologized so many times
That I was so weak
He slowly learned
To forgive me bit by bit
But what he couldn’t learn
Was how to forget
I wait for him to speak again
But there’s nothing else to say
He’s silent and sullen
So I walk away
I hear him sigh
And his footsteps in the mud
He’s not so far behind me
He still says, wait up
I can’t help but listen
I stop and I stay
He says, please don’t go
I tell him I won’t walk away
Never, I promise
And he says the same
I’m sorry, I tell him,
I feel so ashamed
It’s all right, he soothes
Pulling me in
And I know I’ll never
Want anyone but him




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