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When will be the perfect time

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When will be the perfect time
When will we stop the crime

when will we stop the fight
when will we do what is right

when will we say goodbye
to all the wars that make people die

when will we erase the hate
that we humans ourselves create




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This article has 6 comments. Post your own!

Aderes47 said...
Oct. 12, 2011 at 7:32 pm:

Good start but uncomplete. 

:) :( 

 
Loleeta96 replied...
Oct. 13, 2011 at 6:35 pm :
do you know how I could improve it??
 
Aderes47 replied...
Oct. 13, 2011 at 9:29 pm :
Add more lines along the same subject and try to use examples from other poems. PS. I have many poems on Teen Ink. :)
 
Loleeta96 replied...
Oct. 14, 2011 at 6:24 pm :
thank you!
 
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Loleeta96 said...
Oct. 11, 2011 at 10:44 am:
This is one of my very first poems
 
Aderes47 replied...
Oct. 12, 2011 at 7:33 pm :
I love the picture! 
 
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