My Darling This work is considered exceptional by our editorial staff.

We all search for something
Something that will never be found
We all dream for something
Something that we’ll never live

We all know what we are doing
So just let go of everything
To do with us and breathe
Just breathe my darling, breathe into the dark night

My darling, please don’t cry
Learn when to show emotions
Know how to live life,
Without regretting it

Love, my darling, is a wonderful thing
And life, is full of it
I don’t know what awaits you,
But my darling,
That does not matter

Live today, my darling,
My darling, my love,
My live, my hope
Be the person I love,
And try right now

Never waste, my darling
Never waste your life
Its too precious and short
My darling, my tiny little darling

Live, my darling,
Not knowing what comes next,
My darling, spread your wings,
Fly, my darling, fly beyond yourself





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CharlesDickens said...
Feb. 25, 2011 at 5:55 pm
I really liked this poem, as I like all of them, but I did happen to notice one thing.  You repeated, "my darling" slightly more than was necessary.   I still really enjoyed reading this, thanks.
 
Hazel-daisy This work has been published in the Teen Ink monthly print magazine. replied...
Feb. 25, 2011 at 6:29 pm
i agree that i may have used my darling a little too much. And you really dont need to thanks me, i honestly should be thanking you, you have boosted my confidence a lot!!
 
SpringRayyn said...
Feb. 15, 2011 at 5:49 pm
Good way to use repetativeness in poems. I think it weird when you said "my live," but whatever makes you happy. I agree with everyone else's lullaby thing, yeah at the end it sounded like talking to a baby.
 
Hazel-daisy This work has been published in the Teen Ink monthly print magazine. replied...
Feb. 16, 2011 at 1:15 pm
I didn't actually notice that until now ("my live" part) it's supposed to be "my life" thanks for pointing it out!! :) 
 
thedegraded This work has been published in the Teen Ink monthly print magazine. said...
Jan. 15, 2011 at 3:11 pm

I also agree that this poem resembles a lullaby! And gosh, do I love lullabies. This poem made me smile and it put some lovely imagery into my head. I love the theme, and found it entrancing. You definetly have a way with words. I really can't find any flaw in this one...

 

cheers!

 
Ellawind said...
Jan. 3, 2011 at 10:57 pm
Wow, I feel like this is a lullaby. It's very sweet and soothing. I'm picturing a mother with a baby in her arms in a rocking chair on the porch at night. :) Anyways, the repetition of 'my darling' is good in moderation, but I think you used it just a tiny bit too much. I really do mean a tiny bit, like only take out two times. Nice work! 
 
Kbuschan said...
Jan. 2, 2011 at 12:27 pm
i like it and how you kept the theme going by repeating my darling, it makes it all sound a lot smoother :)
 
OriginalCarbonation said...
Jan. 2, 2011 at 1:12 am

oh wow. i really love this. its so... undescribable. feel speechless, but also like talking for ever about this. (but since the words arent coming thats hard!) i really love it when a poem gives me this reaction!

the meaning of he poem seems to shift throughout, but i like that. and i like the repetetive and almost caressing use of "my darling". this is truly an exceptional peice. im afraid if i told you to change *anything* Id ruin it!

 
Hazel-daisy This work has been published in the Teen Ink monthly print magazine. replied...
Jan. 2, 2011 at 7:49 am
thanks so much, your comments mean a lot!!
 
OriginalCarbonation replied...
Jan. 2, 2011 at 11:57 pm
your welcome! your writing means alot! :)
 
Gettysburg63 This work has been published in the Teen Ink monthly print magazine. said...
Dec. 29, 2010 at 5:50 pm
You have a talent in writing poetry. Is this poem on a talk of his father to his daughter? Good work.
 
Hazel-daisy This work has been published in the Teen Ink monthly print magazine. replied...
Dec. 29, 2010 at 6:12 pm
Well in a way it is its more like a relative talking to a loved child telling them everything will be ok, so you could interpret that in any way!! In my mind it was a dying mother telling her child it would be ok..morbid i know!!! thanks for commenting!!
 
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