presence

June 13, 2009
By poetic_natural GOLD, Jefferson, Wisconsin
poetic_natural GOLD, Jefferson, Wisconsin
16 articles 0 photos 66 comments

Favorite Quote:
"you know you're in love because you can't fall asleep, because reality is finally better than your dreams"


my presence lies in the souls of everyone i see.

accomplishing my goals in life is my one destiny.

my life story is very legit.

the further i walk the farther i get.

the pain has worn me down to the tiniest pieces of glass.

but all i see is my future, and I've buried the past.

I've cared and loved only to realize that it's never enough.

but hey, this life is tough.

And when i fall, I'll only know how deep my wounds are if i decide not to get up.

My hopes and dreams lie deep in the sea. And only the angels behold my plea that sets me free.

..that sets me free from the pain that is left in vain.

There comes a time in your life when you realized that giving up never did anything.

someday this story will end. and i guess I'll wait till that time.

but until that time, i will be the best i can be.

because my presence lies in the souls of everyone i see.



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This article has 6 comments.


on Dec. 30 2010 at 1:08 am
2beautifulblueyes, SI, New York
0 articles 0 photos 4 comments

Favorite Quote:
if the one you luv brakes your heart built a bridge n get over it

this is a really great poem!!

on Dec. 2 2010 at 10:06 am
Starrlyt PLATINUM, Willard, North Carolina
20 articles 0 photos 90 comments

Favorite Quote:
Shoot for the moon, even if you miss, you'll land among the stars -Les Brown

"And when i fall, I'll only know how deep my wounds are if i decide not to get up"

This is one of my favorite lines in this poem. It's great.  The rhyming does throw it off a bit but I love it. :)


EdytD SILVER said...
on Sep. 1 2009 at 2:35 am
EdytD SILVER, Livingston, New Jersey
6 articles 0 photos 258 comments
I think this is great, but I feel like the rhyming gets in the way of some of what you're trying to say. I particularly liked the lines, "My hopes and dreams lie deep in the sea" and "the pain has worn me down to the tiniest pieces of glass." I think if you put in some more graphic imagery like these lines, it could be a truly fabulous poem. Great job!

on Jun. 30 2009 at 10:06 pm
I really like this poem! You have a lot of talent, keep writing!

on Jun. 25 2009 at 12:13 am
poetic_natural GOLD, Jefferson, Wisconsin
16 articles 0 photos 66 comments

Favorite Quote:
"you know you're in love because you can't fall asleep, because reality is finally better than your dreams"

please comment


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