Lost in Lies
Author's note: hope people like this piece. Of course it is only chapter one and I almost revise this everyday,... Show full author's note »
“Abby!” a voice screamed, but she couldn't answer her, she could only stare into the white light heading straight for them. She struggled to move, to help her, do anything, but she was stuck. The rain continued to pour around them. The car had flipped in the crash. Heat from the blazing engine fire burned their skin, making it hotter and harder to breathe. They hung trapped at the waist by their seat belts. The fabric held over her diagonally clicked into the side of her seat. She touched her fingers to the broken glass and blood covered ceiling. Her hair dangled limply around her. The light came closer and closer. A scream filled the car. The world went black.
She awoke feeling heavy, as if all her limbs weighed a ton. It was like nothing worked, her eyes couldn't open, and her mouth couldn't speak. She could only hear.
“She's looking good.” A voice spoke, “She should wake up fully within a week or two.”
“Wonderful,” spoke a different.
She struggled to keep up with what they were saying. She wanted to ask what was going on but not even her tongue would shape to voice her words. Her mind spun around and around, where was she? Her fingers tried to move; just a twitch, but the effort excreted only made her more tired. Her lips uttered a small whimper. The room grew quiet. She had forgotten they were there. She heard someone shuffling about the room to stand by her head. The person fumbled with something that felt almost connected to her arm. Her blood pumped. A slow lagging slumber drifted over her as she slipped back into unconsciousness.
“Maybe just a few days,” the first voice had spoken.
A groggily feeling seemed to lift her from her state of sleep. Her head turned back and forth as if to shake off ghosts of her terrible dreams. Her first coherent thought asked, 'What happened to me?' She opened her eyes, they fluttered with tremendous effort. She looked around what she thought had been her new home for some time now. The walls painted white were made of cement, a red strip through the middle. The slanted blinds showered her with rectangular streams of what she thought to be morning light. A door lead to what she thought to be a bathroom. The room smelled of cleaner, and sterility. A steady current of beats emitted from the machine next to where she lay immobile in her bed. An IV lay attached to her arm injected her with a fluid. She didn't have to think to realize she was in a hospital.
The door opening made her jump. A man in a white coat with a stethoscope walked into room. He stopped short when he saw her green eyes looking back at him questioningly.
“You're awake. Do you know where you are?” he asked.
She shook her head no.
“Do you remember what happened to you?”
She shook her head no.
“Do you know your name?”
The doctor had left after that. Saying, “My name is Doctor Malden if you need me,” he wrote on his clipboard and walked out the door. She felt an uneasy feeling over fall her, “Name, my name. My name is… What’s that name? What’s my name? Name? My name is… my name…” A tear fell down her cheek. “Who am I?” she whispered to the empty room.
She was just starting to feel hungry when a nurse walked in about a half an hour later with some food for her. “Hey honey, glad you are finally awake!” said the chipper woman. “My name is Charice, anything you need I’ll get it for you all you got to do is ask.”
Charice has a sort of twinkle to her eye. She set the tray on her bed table and slid it in front of her; it clanked as it hit the hard surface. She presented her with a soft smile. Charice was always a caring woman, loved every one of her patients, not having much money she was required to work full time, being here that long meant she knew a thing or two about this hospital.
“Finally awake?” she replied to the nurse as she nibbled on her toast and apple sauce.
“Honey, they haven’t told you yet? You’ve been in a coma for two years. We were just about giving up on you, until you came around finally,” she said with a gentle smile. She pushed a cup of fruit towards her to eat.
Two years. Her mind tried to wrap around the obtuse concept. Two years of her life, vanished. “How did I get here?”
“Car Accident happened so suddenly. You were covered in blood and broken glass when they finally were able to bring you out of the car and into the ambulance. ”
“I was in a car accident?” She whispered. Suddenly a scene flashed in her mind, A light looming closer to wear she lay trapped, her struggling to escape her seat belt, then a scream. She gripped the sheets tightly, her knuckles turning white. She felt her heart rate beat accelerate.
“Baby Doll you have to stay calm,” Charice said. She ran around fumbling with things on the machine to quiet the rapid beeping.
It took her a while to calm her heart rate. She turned to the kindly nurse, “Charice, do you know my name?”
She smiled at me but then a look seemed to cross her vision and her eyes became cheerless, “Of course honey,” she began in hushed voice, “your name is ---”
“That’ll be enough Charice,” the doctor replied walking through the door, “Go attend to the other patients.”
Charice’s eyes closed slowly, “Right away sir.” She walked away taking the tray of half eaten food. It was alright thought, she didn’t seem to feel hungry anymore.
“My name is Doctor Malcolm, I have been taking care of you during your time in the hospital,” the doctor said to the girl Charice had been talking to. “How are you feeling?” he then asked. He looked up from his clipboard when she didn’t answer right away.
“Why won’t anyone tell me my name?”
“We didn’t want to stress out your mind, also we wanted to see if it came back to you naturally,” the doctor replied simply.
He gave her a smile, “Now then, you seem to be progressing wonderfully. Has any of your memory returned to you?”
She thought back to when Charice was talking to her, “I had a sort of vision in my head, of I’m guessing the last moments before I passed out during the crash. All I remember is being trapped and a white light coming towards the car. It was terrifying.”
The doctor looked inquisitively at her, “Hmmm, it must be memory loss then, sometimes when something as traumatic as a car accident occurs your mind erases to protect you. This could be a blessing in disguise.”
She thought about it, a blessing? “Will my memory ever return?”
“Hard to say, it seems that we will just have to wait it out. You were in that coma two years; it’s tough to determine if it will ever return.”
Her hands clasped to her chest tightly, “Will you please tell me who I am?”
“Your name is Miss Elaina Hayward.” He replied taking out a sheet of paper she thought to be her birth certificate.
“Elaina Hayward, Elaina,” she repeated her name. Something about it didn’t feel right, but what could she say? He was holding her birth certificate right up to her face.
“And as for the rest I think it will better be clarified by someone closer to you. I was to tell you that he is sorry he can’t be here now, but he will come tomorrow.”
She breathed a sigh of relief. Someone knew she was here; someone could help her figure out who she was exactly. Then another thought struck her, “Who exactly?”
“Your fiance, he said he is going to fly in three days to stay with you.”
“Fiance? I am getting married?”
“I’m afraid so,” he replied sadly, “the accident happened just a few weeks before the ceremony was to take place.”
A nurse came in to tell the doctor he was needed in another patient’s room. Doctor Malcolm politely excused himself and left, closing the door behind him.
Charice came in sometime later with her cheery smile, a pill, and some water. “Here you go honey, something to make you feel better.”
I smiled genuinely at her, she made being in the hospital better, one person she could talk to. She put the pill in her mouth and gulped down some water.
“Well honey better get going, so many hurt souls, and so little time.”
She gave Charice an almost crazed look, “You’re leaving? Can’t you stay for a while?”
Charice bit her lip unsure she seemed to be weighing heavily on the options, “I really do think I should get going I –“
“Please stay, I need to talk to you please,” A moment of loneliness she felt shined through her eyes in soundless despair.
Charice sighed, “Of course I will stay if you need me honey.”
The girl gave her a bright smile then it faltered, “I feel like you are the only person I can trust.”
She squeezed her hand, “You can trust me.”
They sat and talked for a while, about Charice’s children and how long she has worked at the hospital. They talked about the weather. Elaina tried to talk about what she remembered but figured it wasn’t much.
“Charice,” she asked suddenly.
“Do you know what’s going on? How did I get into a car crash, did you ever hear?”
She lowered her head, “It’s just one of those things, I am not especially sure how it all happened.”
“Why didn’t you tell me my name before? The doctor came in and you just left.”
“Honey there are just some things you don’t understand right now. I am sorry but it is something you will have to figure out on your own. It is not safe for me to be telling you these things.”
Not safe? Her eyes widened, “Why is it not safe?”
Charice looked through the door quickly, and leaned towards her, “There are things hidden from you, some things you are not meant to know, what they---“
“They? Who they,” she felt hysteric.
“Charice,” a quiet voice spoke from the door. How long had he been there? “You are wanted in Mr. Peter’s room, he needs his pain medication.”
Charice closed her eyes for a long while; she took a deep breath, when she opened them they looked almost empty, “Right away sir.” Charice touched her arm lightly in apology as she left.
“Hello Elaina how are you feeling?”
“Fine,” she replied simply.
He came over with a flashlight in his hand, “I am going to turn this light on. To test your iris reflexes and to test your eye movement I want you to follow the light.”
She followed the light as it clicked on going up and down, up and down. The light went left right, left then right. Her eyes followed left right, left right. The light flashed across her eyes, screams suddenly filled her ears. She wasn’t in the hospital anymore. The light coming towards her, her arms flew to shield her face. She shook. The heart beats from the monitor increased rapidly. She cradled her head in her hands. Reality set in a few moments later as the light left her eyes. She opened her horror filled eyes to stare at a very concerned looking Dr. Malcolm.
“Elaina can you hear me? Are you alright?
She shook her head to clear her thoughts, “Yeah, I’m alright. I think I am just having flashes of the accident, they only last a few seconds but they are so vivid sometimes. It feels like I’m trapped in that car again.”
He shook his head as he listened to her story, “Yes that is quite common.”
“How long will it last?”
“After a traumatic experience some feel the experience immediately, others appear to be strong or even numb to their experience. Others can feel strong emotions or flashbacks you feel from the accident. Helping everyone express their thoughts and feelings in a safe and open manner is one of the most positive things you can do at a time like this.”
She shook her head solemnly, though that sounded like a rehearsed answer.
“After we are sure you are alright and you are allowed to leave the hospital I will prescribe something to you that will help your mind cope with the accident. As for now I think sleep is probably your best option.” He wrote on his clipboard and walked out the room.
About twenty minutes later he returned with a needle, he said it would just be something to put her to sleep. She watched him through her slowly closing eyes as he left the room.