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The Black Arrow Murders

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Chapter Six: A Return

The next morning was Saturday morning and every Saturday morning Noah and Charlie would always go out to break fast at Bob’s, but recently they stopped doing it because Charlie didn’t want to go. Instead the two would spend the day watching TV and playing catch with the football.

“Nice Catch!” Charlie yelled as Noah made a one handed diving grab.
“Made the best of a bad throw.” Noah said with a smile.
“Yeah, whatever, you throw like a girl you know?” Charlie said.
“Speaking of girls when are you going to get one?” Noah said as he chuckled.
“When you get a job.” Charlie said as he caught the ball.

The two played for another hour until Noah asked Charlie about the person who moved into the Brown house.

“Did you ever meet whoever bought the Brown place?” Noah asked as the two made their way back into the house.
“No I didn’t. I went over there yesterday but no one was home.” Charlie said.
“I kind of want to meet him. Figure out why anyone would move to that beat up house.” Noah said as he tossed the football in the closet.
“Hey Noah, can you make sure the garage is locked?” Charlie asked as he was walking into his room.
“Yeah no problem.” Noah said as he walked out the back door.

Noah went into the garage and saw Sam lying there.

“Sam! How did you get in here?” Noah asked.

Noah helped Sam up and brought her into the kitchen so she could eat. Charlie walked out of his room and saw Sam eating in the kitchen.

“Sam! Where were you?!” Charlie said.
“I found her in the garage.” Noah said.
“How did she get in there?” Charlie asked.
“No idea.” Noah said.
“Well I’m glad she is okay.” Charlie said as he walked back into his room.

Noah was in his room reading when his phone rang.

“Unknown caller.” Noah said
“Hello.” he said as he answered his phone.
“Noah, hey it’s Grace.” Grace said
“Oh hey Grace, um how did you get my number?” Noah asked.
“Got it out of Brandon’s phone.” She said.
“Well that makes sense.” Noah said.
“Haha yeah well I wanted to know if you had plans tomorrow, if you were free, I wanted to know if you wanted to come over.” Grace said
“I’m not busy; sure I’ll be there around noon. Wait, why are you asking me to come over and not Brandon?” Noah asked
“He’s going with his parents to the football game or something. He invited me to go but I didn’t want to.” She said.
“Why not? He’s your boyfriend isn’t he?” Noah asked.
“I guess, I don’t really like him, he’s kind of a jerk.” Grace said
“Yeah lately.” Noah said.
“Well I got to go to bed I’ll see you tomorrow.” Grace said in a happy tone.
“Ok goodnight see you tomorrow.” Noah said.

The two hung up and Noah put his book on his table and turned his light off and went to sleep.
Chapters:   « Previous 1 ... 4 5 6 7 8 9 ... 21 Next »


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This book has 22 comments. Post your own now!

Masey400 said...
Aug. 12, 2012 at 12:03 pm
Great plot concept. It sounds very interesting. I think you should have made the detailed descriptions more gradual-said the whole thing about the 17 year old kid having dreamed of leaving his whole live when he gets in a fight with his parents or something.
 
Ashley_Tucker said...
Apr. 23, 2012 at 6:58 pm
The entire first chapter was information overload. We don't need to know everyones life story before the actual story begins. Take your first paragraph for instance. Let us know this is all taking place in Black Arrow within the first page or two along with how much he hates the town. Towards the end of the first chapter let us find out that his parents died. That's heart renching stuff! But if I only know the boys name and where he is, how am I supposed to feel bad for him when you bring up tha... (more »)
 
DarkMountain said...
Dec. 11, 2011 at 12:07 pm
Good story! But way too much "telling", in my opinion. Every emotion, action, or aspect of the story was relayed through an "and then this happened" format, which is great for a certain audience. However, I'd work on more of a "showing" approach- it can tear down the barrier between story and reader, and gives it a more real feel. Still, I liked the story a lot. Good work.
 
Ewburt said...
Nov. 12, 2011 at 10:27 am
how did this get to #2 LOL
 
kitkat said...
Oct. 30, 2011 at 4:55 pm
I liked it. 3/10
 
KangarooHulabaloo said...
Oct. 6, 2011 at 9:34 pm
Cool story, I would just say that if you revise it, it will definitely be smoother
 
Azrael said...
Sept. 14, 2011 at 11:03 pm
it was gud and needed to sloe down a bit but i luved it :)
 
writerfreak21231This teenager is a 'regular' and has contributed a lot of work, comments and/or forum posts, and has received many votes and high ratings over a long period of time. said...
Aug. 23, 2011 at 1:14 pm
nightstalker part three, four, and five is now out! Go check it out if you liked the first and second! :)(:
 
Marlo said...
Aug. 13, 2011 at 11:01 am
Could have beenn better, man. It had its moments but overall felt lacking. Still liked it though.
 
Xxx B. said...
May 19, 2011 at 8:51 pm
......woah.
 
Alec.M.Strong replied...
May 22, 2011 at 12:57 am
what do you mean woah?
 
fc barca 10 said...
May 1, 2011 at 12:22 pm
what can I say about this story, AWESOME! keep writing! I can't wait to read your next work!
 
mac123 said...
Apr. 30, 2011 at 8:35 am
Best book I've read on here! awesome story! please keep writing!!!
 
Beautiful Jaz said...
Apr. 24, 2011 at 12:43 pm
this book was great, fascinating story and definetly a ending I didn't expect. Well done!
 
PJD17 This work has been published in the Teen Ink monthly print magazine. said...
Mar. 23, 2011 at 5:48 pm
Great story! i love this kind of work  mystery genre is my favorite   Could you please take a look at and comment on my story Manso's Shame
 
Alec.M.Strong replied...
Mar. 23, 2011 at 9:12 pm
thank you! I'll get to it when I can i've got lots going on now but I will get to it! :D
 
vikingfan1018 said...
Feb. 17, 2011 at 1:42 pm
Thank you for the support!
 
Timekeeper This work has been published in the Teen Ink monthly print magazine. replied...
Feb. 22, 2011 at 8:05 pm
This is neat, it was cool to be able to read the entire thing all the way through, but it was a little short! I look forward to your next work!
 
Alec.M.Strong replied...
Feb. 22, 2011 at 10:03 pm
It is a bit short but it is a children's book, can't have it to long. I also plan to extend it a bit to add to the story. Thanks!
 
Blondi said...
Feb. 17, 2011 at 11:28 am
Good job, Alec!  You have a talent for building suspense, once I started, I couldn't stop reading.  I just had to know what came next.
 

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