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The Black Arrow Murders

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Chapters:   « Previous 1 2 3 4 5 6 ... 21 Next »

Chapter Three: Friendly Fight

At school the next day Noah was walking through the front door when he hears some yell.
“Hey butt head!” “Why didn’t you answer my call last night?” Brandon asked angrily
“Sorry, I was doin my homework and chores, I didn’t have time.” Noah said
“You’re such a nerd” Brandon said following a laugh and a punch to Noah’s arm.
“Anyway, I was callin to tell you what I was doin last night.” Brandon said with a smile.
“Do I even wanna know?” Noah asked as he opened his locker.
“I went to Bob’s last night” Brandon said with the same stupid smile on his face
“Great, why are you so happy about goin to Bob’s?” Noah asked as he was starting to get annoyed with Brandon.
“Well that’s not why I’m happy. I’m happy because I went with Grace Simmons.” Brandon said arrogantly.

Obviously Noah wasn’t too pleased about his best friend goin out on a date with the girl he’s admired for years.

“Why would Grace go out with you?” Noah asked angrily
“Why wouldn’t she be? I’m handsome, funny, and smart.” Brandon said.
“Yeah, that’s it.” Noah said as he rolled his eyes.
“What do you mean?” Brandon said with a puzzled look on his face.
“Dude she went out with you because you’re rich, that’s all.” Noah said.
“Shut up! She and I went out because she has a thing for me.” Brandon said angrily.
“Mhmm your right cause you’re such a stud Brandon.” Noah said sarcastically.
Brandon was irate and tried punching Noah in the head but Noah moved and Brandon’s strike went straight into the locker and Noah slammed it shut on Brandon’s hand.
“Ow!” Brandon screamed and fell to the floor clutching his hand. Noah just walked away and didn’t see Brandon again that day. Brandon called Noah that night though.
“What do you want?” Noah said in an annoyed tone as he answered the phone.
“You broke my hand you jerk!” Brandon screamed at the top of his lungs.
“You helped.” Noah said amusingly.
“I hate you!” Brandon screamed.
“Okay” Noah replied then he hung up the phone.
“Someone needs to chill out.” Noah said to himself as he lay in bed reading.

Charlie walks into Noah’s room with a strange look on his face; Noah doesn’t look at him instead just focuses on his book.
“Um, Hey bud, can you put down the book for a second?” Charlie slurred.
Then Noah looks up and see’s Charlie and can tell something is wrong.
“What’s up?” Noah said as he set the book down on his bedside table.

Charlie sat down on the foot of Noah’s bed and didn’t say anything.
“Charlie?” Noah asked, concerned about his brother.
“Sam was out back and I heard her barking, facing the ol’ Brown house and I opened the door she looked back at me then ran off down the road” Charlie said as he was shaking.
Sam was the family dog that Charlie and Noah’s dad bought when Noah turned one.
“Its fine she’s out all the time” Noah said.
“I know I just don’t like her running out this late at night, I’m worried she’ll get hurt” Charlie said still shaking.
“She’ll be fine Charlie, I’m goin to bed can you go?” Noah asked.
“Yeah, goodnight.” Charlie said as he walked out of Noah’s room shutting the door behind him.
“That was weird; I haven’t seen Charlie like that since mom and pa.” Noah said to himself quietly.
Chapters:   « Previous 1 2 3 4 5 6 ... 21 Next »


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This book has 22 comments. Post your own!

Masey400 said...
Aug. 12, 2012 at 12:03 pm:
Great plot concept. It sounds very interesting. I think you should have made the detailed descriptions more gradual-said the whole thing about the 17 year old kid having dreamed of leaving his whole live when he gets in a fight with his parents or something.
 
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Ashley_Tucker said...
Apr. 23, 2012 at 6:58 pm:
The entire first chapter was information overload. We don't need to know everyones life story before the actual story begins. Take your first paragraph for instance. Let us know this is all taking place in Black Arrow within the first page or two along with how much he hates the town. Towards the end of the first chapter let us find out that his parents died. That's heart renching stuff! But if I only know the boys name and where he is, how am I supposed to feel bad for him when you bring up tha... (more »)
 
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DarkMountain said...
Dec. 11, 2011 at 12:07 pm:
Good story! But way too much "telling", in my opinion. Every emotion, action, or aspect of the story was relayed through an "and then this happened" format, which is great for a certain audience. However, I'd work on more of a "showing" approach- it can tear down the barrier between story and reader, and gives it a more real feel. Still, I liked the story a lot. Good work.
 
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Ewburt said...
Nov. 12, 2011 at 10:27 am:
how did this get to #2 LOL
 
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kitkat said...
Oct. 30, 2011 at 4:55 pm:
I liked it. 3/10
 
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KangarooHulabaloo said...
Oct. 6, 2011 at 9:34 pm:
Cool story, I would just say that if you revise it, it will definitely be smoother
 
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Azrael said...
Sept. 14, 2011 at 11:03 pm:
it was gud and needed to sloe down a bit but i luved it :)
 
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writerfreak21231This teenager is a 'regular' and has contributed a lot of work, comments and/or forum posts, and has received many votes and high ratings over a long period of time. said...
Aug. 23, 2011 at 1:14 pm:
nightstalker part three, four, and five is now out! Go check it out if you liked the first and second! :)(:
 
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Marlo said...
Aug. 13, 2011 at 11:01 am:
Could have beenn better, man. It had its moments but overall felt lacking. Still liked it though.
 
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Xxx B. said...
May 19, 2011 at 8:51 pm:
......woah.
 
Alec.M.Strong replied...
May 22, 2011 at 12:57 am :
what do you mean woah?
 
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fc barca 10 said...
May 1, 2011 at 12:22 pm:
what can I say about this story, AWESOME! keep writing! I can't wait to read your next work!
 
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mac123 said...
Apr. 30, 2011 at 8:35 am:
Best book I've read on here! awesome story! please keep writing!!!
 
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Beautiful Jaz said...
Apr. 24, 2011 at 12:43 pm:
this book was great, fascinating story and definetly a ending I didn't expect. Well done!
 
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PJD17 This work has been published in the Teen Ink monthly print magazine. said...
Mar. 23, 2011 at 5:48 pm:
Great story! i love this kind of work  mystery genre is my favorite   Could you please take a look at and comment on my story Manso's Shame
 
Alec.M.Strong replied...
Mar. 23, 2011 at 9:12 pm :
thank you! I'll get to it when I can i've got lots going on now but I will get to it! :D
 
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vikingfan1018 said...
Feb. 17, 2011 at 1:42 pm:
Thank you for the support!
 
Timekeeper This work has been published in the Teen Ink monthly print magazine. replied...
Feb. 22, 2011 at 8:05 pm :
This is neat, it was cool to be able to read the entire thing all the way through, but it was a little short! I look forward to your next work!
 
Alec.M.Strong replied...
Feb. 22, 2011 at 10:03 pm :
It is a bit short but it is a children's book, can't have it to long. I also plan to extend it a bit to add to the story. Thanks!
 
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Blondi said...
Feb. 17, 2011 at 11:28 am:
Good job, Alec!  You have a talent for building suspense, once I started, I couldn't stop reading.  I just had to know what came next.
 
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