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The Book of All Sins

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Chapters:   « Previous 1 2 3 4 5 6 ... 27 Next »

Chapter 1 Part one "My name is..."

My name is Ben Williams and I’m a historian and my primary study is about Christian history, Jesus and the Bible. The reason why I like doing this is because; when I was growing up we had always gone to church. We’ve gone to everything, such as holidays, bible studies, and group outings. I loved it so much that I want to learn more. After awhile, I started to get more into the artifacts than the history of it. What’s sad is that my parents want me to become a pastor rather than looking at artifacts of Jesus or the time period that he lived in. After I graduated high school I started looking up jobs for what I wanted to do. One of the jobs said that I needed to go to college to work for them. So I went back and graduated from UW Madison; and I was the top student in that school. After that, the job I wanted closed down because they didn’t have enough money to pay their employees. One of the employees told me I should move to New York and find a job there. He even gave me money to help get a place because he said I was a good kid.
After that I moved, not to the city though but outside in the suburbs. I live in a two story house with a wide front porch and backyard perfect for grilling out. Then there’s my next door neighbor. Her name is Jenny Miller, a redhead with green eyes, and always has a smile on her face. For the last three weeks she’s been having nightmares. What’s funny is that it takes place at Troy’s Book Store. She left the house to go see what is taking so long. She gets out of the car and sees that I get stabbed in the chest by a bald African American man wearing a leather jacket, blue jeans, and black shoes. It’s the same dream each week. When she does have these dreams, she comes to my house at 2:00am and rings the doorbell. Then I wake up, go down the stairs and answer the door. After that I ask her if anything is bothering her or, if she had seen something on TV that may be why she has this dreams. But her answer is, “No.” and I try to ask her other questions, and it’s still the same answer.
After we talk for an hour, she asked if I can take her home. When she asks, I always take her home. But it just kills me because this dream is about me and not anyone else. They say when you are little you can get dreams that can see the future. But I don’t believe in that kind of stuff. Also they said that your dreams tell you what you are worried about, maybe she thinks that the work I do might make me crazy or something. And that I might die researching too much, but that would never happen to me. After I walk her home, I go back to my house to go back to sleep. But that never happens, so if I don’t go to sleep, I just go and research more on my work. But I can’t wait for tomorrow, Troy called saying that he has Jesus’ journal. Funny thing is, no one knows about this journal.
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This book has 7 comments. Post your own!

louise15 said...
Nov. 4, 2012 at 2:52 pm:
WOOOOOOOOOOOWWWW!!! i loved it!
 
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dezluvsuThis teenager is a 'regular' and has contributed a lot of work, comments and/or forum posts, and has received many votes and high ratings over a long period of time. said...
Nov. 4, 2012 at 1:20 pm:
it was very good and inspiring
 
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Gecko said...
Oct. 25, 2012 at 7:45 pm:
good story! I recommend one thing: try to substitute words like 'said' and 'asked' for more meaningful and descriptive words that more express how the character is saying this, like 'growled', 'snapped', 'whispered', etc, etc.
 
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Snowflakes said...
Oct. 25, 2012 at 7:31 pm:
Hey :) So I think this is a pretty damn amazing piece of writing. It is really creative, and as the comment says bellow, completely orignial. I have never read a storyline close to this, so congrats on that ! However, it can be a bit hard to read because your sentences sometimes get a little jumbled, the grammar can be quite poor and you repeat a lot of words. The amount of times I saw the word 'then' was unbelievable haha! 
I also think you should comment more on the sur... (more »)
 
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LestyP said...
Oct. 24, 2012 at 6:42 pm:
Totally original and I LOVE this!! 
 
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LinkinPark12 This work has been published in the Teen Ink monthly print magazine. said...
Oct. 21, 2012 at 4:50 am:
Hey E.T.Wotruba! As promised, I've read it :) This is a really good plot line and depending on how far you want to develop it, it could be exceptational! :)  However, there are a few things you need to work on: -Overuse of the word "said" and "?" -There are loads of connectives; try to get rid of most of them, they take away tension, especially in death scenes. -Part 1 especially is quite informal; using ph... (more »)
 
E.T.Wotruba replied...
Nov. 5, 2012 at 9:49 am :
Yes, but your way of spelling and mine are different. Thanks :)
 
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