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The Black Cardigan

The Black Cardigan
Summary: "Mira was fifteen with blonde curls. Her smile resembled a toy doll’s smile and her perfume entered each room before she did. Mira was included in every single picture in the den, whether was on a mantel or hanging above the fireplace.
She performed well in her classes, not outstandingly, but her work stood out from her acquaintances’. She would hum answers and nod. She walked with a sort of elegance, as if each stride was attached to a blissful cloud. Yet unlike her classmates, whispers and whistles very rarely trailed behind her. On the occasion that they did, she would walk on, undaunted."

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This book has 3 comments. Post your own now!

HeartofMine said...
Dec. 6, 2013 at 1:14 pm
This looks like it has some potential, but it needs some serious editing.  I would work on making the sentences flow smoothly together.  It is pretty confusing.  I do like, however, the fact that you didn't immediately bring romance on to the scene, like so many here do.  Keep working on it.  If you make it easier to read it might be noticed.  I'm curious to find out more!  I love a book that isn't just so obvious and predictable, one that is unusal... (more »)
Vagabond said...
Jul. 15, 2012 at 5:38 am

The story is nice just it gets a lil confusing in the mid. Otherwise i loved it!!

Good Job!! :)

ELM522 This work has been published in the Teen Ink monthly print magazine. replied...
Jul. 17, 2012 at 6:42 pm
Thank you!  Hopefully it becomes less confusing once I write more.

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