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Romeo and Juliet--A Parody

Author's note: I wrote this as a final assignment for our Romeo and Juliet novel study in English. I hope...  Show full author's note »
Author's note: I wrote this as a final assignment for our Romeo and Juliet novel study in English. I hope people will help me by giving me a bit of constructive criticism about plot, pacing, writing technique, dialogue, etc.  « Hide author's note
Chapters:   « Previous 1 2 3 4 Next »

Something Exciting

The stranger had spent a good half of the night in the shrubs, writing the romantic scene between Romeo and Juliet. He was so exhausted that he had fallen asleep in the shrubs and didn’t wake up until it was almost noon.
“Something exciting is afoot! I can sense it in the air. The waters of tension are boiling over and I sense a tragic outcome of today.”
“There is young Juliet and her friends; I must follow them. Doom is drawn to her beauty like a moth to a flame.”

“Why’re you so tired, Juliet?” Cat asked.
“I was up until midnight at the dance; then I didn’t fall asleep until four in the morning.”
“Were you thinking about the cute guy from the dance?”
“Don’t be stupid, Cat,” I snapped. “I just couldn’t get to sleep, that’s all.”
“Well, my dad says they still haven’t caught him.” Cat’s dad was a cop. “He must be good if he’s still on the run.”
“I hope they catch him; he’s probably severely mentally ill. He needs help.”
“And if you weren’t dating Paris you would have gone out with him, wouldn’t you?”
“No! Cat, he was stalking me. Get it through your head: I don’t like him!”
“Whatever you say.” Cat stopped abruptly and stared at the convenience store. “Look who’s coming this way.”
I squinted to see who she was looking at. “Miranda and Betty? What’s the big deal?”
“They made a fool of me in front of my boyfriend.”
“Calm down; you don’t really want to fight.” I tried to soothe her bad mood.
“Yes I do! They have to learn that they can’t get away with whatever they want.” She smiled briefly. “They’re heading right this way.”
“Let’s go, Cat.”
I grabbed her arm and tried to steer her away, but she stood firm. A vicious yet arrogant look was planted firmly on her features. There was no stopping her, not when she was in this mood.
“Hey Catherine, how’s your boyfriend?” Miranda, the shorter one asked. She knew full well Cat hated her full name.
“He’s doing fine, but he’d be a lot better if he didn’t have to see your ugly face every day.”
Miranda flew at Cat, ready to fight. But Cat was ready for her and she had taken three years of judo; she was more than a match for Miranda. In a matter of seconds, Miranda was on the ground and Cat didn’t even have her hair out of place. So much for a dramatic fight between two rivals.

The man was watching the whole scene from a spruce tree a few feet away. He scowled, disappointed in such behaviour from women. How much more exciting would it have been if it were men duelling each other!
“Juliet’s friend, this ‘Cat’, shall be called Tybalt. Tybalt, the king of cats!” he smiled and wrote it down.
“Oh, happy fortune! The love-stricken Romeo is coming this way.” He carefully climbed down from the tree to greet the young man. “Prithee, lad, what ails thee?”
The man furrowed his brow; this lad was a bit slow. “You are a love-stricken lad with nothing to look forward to here. Pray, come with me and be a part of my great tragedy called ‘Romeo and Juliet.’ My theatre performs plays for the Queen herself!”
“Sure, I’ll come with you.” He sighed. “Anything is better than sticking around here with the cops after me.”
So the two men went back to where the stranger had appeared just the other night.
“What’s your name, by the way?” Romeo asked the man.
“Shakespeare. William Shakespeare.”
Chapters:   « Previous 1 2 3 4 Next »

Join the Discussion

This book has 208 comments. Post your own now!

Daphne said...
Feb. 9, 2012 at 8:16 am
Wow. I loved your story! It's amazingly funny :)
CarrieAnn13 replied...
Mar. 4, 2012 at 6:29 pm
Thank you! :)
AcrossTheUniverse said...
Jan. 16, 2012 at 6:06 pm
I love the irony in here! I hated reading Romeo and Juliet last year, so imagine how much I enjoyed this parody. I was so caught up in the story that I forgot to notice the mechanics of the writing itself. I liked the narration shift but I thought the conclusion ended a tad to sloppily.
CarrieAnn13 replied...
Jan. 16, 2012 at 9:26 pm
Thanks for the thoughtful comment! :) I did write this a while ago, and looking back with the skill I have now, I have to agree with you. My ending was pretty sloppy.
Malsie8 said...
Dec. 23, 2011 at 7:38 pm
Very true! I think Romeo and Juliet is a perfect example of ranging teenage hormones!!
CarrieAnn13 replied...
Dec. 23, 2011 at 7:42 pm
Thanks for commenting! :)
Tbug1997 said...
Dec. 9, 2011 at 8:36 pm
i really like this im adding it to my favs
CarrieAnn13 replied...
Dec. 9, 2011 at 8:36 pm
Thanks so much! :)
holysunshine replied...
Dec. 21, 2011 at 7:20 am
I really enjoyed your story.. you should write moree!!!!!
CarrieAnn13 replied...
Dec. 21, 2011 at 7:57 am
Thanks for commenting! :)  But I'm not going to write more, not on this story anyway.
UNserieswriter said...
Dec. 9, 2011 at 6:08 pm
great spin off!! whats your fav shakespeare?! please comment on my story it would mean a lot. graci!
CarrieAnn13 replied...
Dec. 9, 2011 at 7:50 pm
I don't really read Shakespeare, but I think 'Julius Caesar' would be my favourite.  What story would you like me to commet on?
alanna_mcc This work has been published in the Teen Ink monthly print magazine. said...
Nov. 6, 2011 at 4:17 pm
Wait, how does Romeo end up living in medeival England if this story took place in modern-day? Anyway, I loved the Shakespeare part thats hilarious i love how you described Shakespeare writing the story. also, romeo as a stalker?! NICE!
CarrieAnn13 replied...
Nov. 6, 2011 at 6:47 pm
Thanks for the comment! :)  But I think you missed the part where Shakespeare takes Romeo back to Medieval England with him.
alanna_mcc This work has been published in the Teen Ink monthly print magazine. replied...
Nov. 16, 2011 at 7:04 pm
oh. guess so.
CarrieAnn13 replied...
Nov. 17, 2011 at 9:25 pm
No worries. :)  I really appreciate the time you took to read my novel.  Is there anything of yours you'd like me to read?
alanna_mcc This work has been published in the Teen Ink monthly print magazine. replied...
Nov. 27, 2011 at 12:42 pm
YES! everything lol :)
CarrieAnn13 replied...
Nov. 27, 2011 at 1:49 pm
Sorry, I don't have time to read everything.  Could you name two or three things you'd like me to read instead?
alanna_mcc This work has been published in the Teen Ink monthly print magazine. replied...
Dec. 14, 2011 at 5:13 pm
you should look at my page and click on things that look interesting....that'd be cool. oh, and read "starting over" thx :)
CarrieAnn13 replied...
Dec. 14, 2011 at 6:23 pm
Sure!  I'm right on it. :)

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