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Rat Key (Updated Version)

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milforce
Rat Key (Updated Version)
Summary: The year 2076 has been rough on the city of Maw, one of three cities left in the world. Rat made his way to the city after he'd lost his memory and he found himself in the Tunnels, an underground system of labyrinths that serves as a home to the city's gangs. Rat is perfectly happy with a low-key life, but as a revolution brews, it seems like everyone knows his name, even those from the other two cities.



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CurlyGirl17This teenager is a 'regular' and has contributed a lot of work, comments and/or forum posts, and has received many votes and high ratings over a long period of time. said...
Aug. 10, 2013 at 2:53 pm:
I didn't know if there was a way to contact you other than posting on your discussion page, but I just wanted to let you know I posted the rest of my story Metalligirl. I'd really appreciate some feedback on the rest of it; you did a great job on your story and the last comment you gave me was very informative and thorough!
 
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IMSteelThis teenager is a 'regular' and has contributed a lot of work, comments and/or forum posts, and has received many votes and high ratings over a long period of time. said...
May 17, 2013 at 2:48 pm:
I commented on your earlier version of this, and I see that you've filled in the thin places nicely.  The excitement you keep in the story is great, and the setting of the book is really cool.  The dialogue is really good, though I would say that it could use a little trimming on the sarcasm.  On a lot of my earlier stories, (I haven't posted them on Teen Ink), I used a lot of sarcasm, but I've found that it is better to use a moderate amount of it.  Pret... (more »)
 
milforce replied...
May 18, 2013 at 9:35 am :
Thanks so much! Your feedback is great and I'll be sure to read some more of your story soon!
 
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