The Dilemma of Growing Up | Teen Ink

The Dilemma of Growing Up

December 9, 2015
By nandinisharma307 BRONZE, Dehradun, New York
nandinisharma307 BRONZE, Dehradun, New York
2 articles 0 photos 0 comments

How do we grow up? How do teenagers actually transcend into adulthood? Some people view it as an age phenomenon. “Okay, now you’re fifteen/sixteen/blah dee blah, so you’ve got get your wits together and behave like an adult. Act mature. Be responsible” Yes, but how do you really expect a person to just transform in a second? Some say its experience and theoretically, on paper, they are absolutely correct. Old people are wise because of their huge inventory of experiences. But, I say it is not true.

You see I’m already sixteen and in line to turn seventeen by the end of this december. And, I want to grow up. My parents, teachers and relatives keep telling me to. Honestly speaking, watching adults and hearing about the hardships of the mature makes my willingness to grow up a reluctant willingness. However, when you’re a certain age you don’t want people badgering you about your inadequate behaviour constantly.


Now, considering the fact that I am already on the brink of my entry into the twenties, The “age phenomenon” of growing up doesn’t really apply. I am still careless < A person who tends to misplace, forget about and destroys things, friendships, everything tangible and intangible. >


Then, I am lazy < reluctant to move my derriere from wherever I have set it.>


Basically speaking, you could use a wide variety of downbeat adjectives to describe yours truly.
The other theory of “experiences” can also be ruled out as I assure the readers that I have had my share of scarring experiences. All to be saved for retelling when I’m old and and my children are all grown up( I should also assure you that my children willl be allowed a rather large amount of time for their growing up, taking from my painful dilemma).


I have been in boarding schools since I was five. That should make me fantastically independent and responsible, rights? Well, if you believe that, all my wardens and housemistresses shake their heads and tut at you for your credulity, for they hold me responsible for all their white hair.
If you aren’t a part of my breed of disillusioned teenagers, let me explain to you the torture of being stuck in this no-man’s land.


The joke is always on you.  You are the butt of EVERY joke. That is because everyone knows that you aren’t “GROWN UP” enough to take offense. So, you’ll be laughing along without really realising the humiliating potential of the joke.


Even if you have a crazy amount of talent ,you’ll never land up anything. Be it a role in the school play or a spot on the school team. Teachers will always believe that you’ll be late for the practice. Never learn up your lines. Mess up due to your lack of accountability. So, they ask themselves, “why take the risk?”


Parents will always speak in threatening tones. Even before you actually do anything disastrous, your mom will launch into a terribly long lecture about being responsible and will begin to blame you for a million imaginative things using future tense phrases like- “ I know you’ll do this, I know you’ll do that. And it is simply NOT RIGHT!!” And then believing you’ve already committed the imagined crimes, you’ll be punished. 


You’ll never get to buy expensive things. “What’s the point sweetheart? You’ll lose it!” So, when all your friends will have beautiful, expensive things to show off, you’ll always have cheap brown things that wouldn’t even break if Hulk sat on them.


You’ll always be terrified if you need to ask your parents for something. You’ll go through a million palpitations before you can ask them for something. You know they’ll say NO, and then you need to gear yourself up for a fight that’ll usually end up with you saying, “ Mom, I swear I won’t break it/lose it/destroy it this time.”


And it’s always heartbreaking when you lose something.


Lastly, you’re ALWAYS getting a lecture. A lot of the times, random people come and lecture thinking you’re some sort of damaged goods that they’ll repair with a few words and take credit for it in the future. “Don’t worry. I’ll help you. You know, I fixed her so…”  And, the lectures are  all the same. I mean, they do affect me. They do. I feel really horrible after one. And I try to understand. I do. BUT.  When the same person is delivering the same lecture for the millionth time, I just want to say, “Don’t you get it? If I could have helped it, I WOULD HAVE BY NOW! Do you think I like being this way? Don’t you thing the problem lies way deeper than something I could help by myself?


So, now you probably understand the pain of being stuck here. It’s like being stuck in an Indian Traffic Jam.  You don’t know if you’re EVER going to get out of there…It’s terrifying and helpless.


So How exactly do we grow up?


The author's comments:

My complete helplessness over my life inspired me to write this article. I think that many teenagers like me across the world feel the same way. And it would just be amazing if people out there could relate to it and find comfort in the fact that there is someone out there going through the same thing.


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