How well do you know your opponent? | Teen Ink

How well do you know your opponent?

December 3, 2014
By Chy97 BRONZE, Peoria, Arizona
Chy97 BRONZE, Peoria, Arizona
1 article 0 photos 0 comments

Anybody can fight to a certain extent, but there are several different types of fighters. In order to know how to defeat each type, one must understand the differences should they ever be faced with one. Some train and are ready for a fight at any point, we'll call these professionals. Then there are those who can defend themselves if needed but prefer not to fight unless necessary: defensive. Next we have the antagonist, who wants to fight everybody for no reason. These are who people most try to avoid: reckless fighters. Next there are girly fighters which comes from the notion “you fight like a girl." These are the people who slap and pull hair when faced with a fight. Novice fighters follow suit. They are the ones who have absolutely no idea what to do when a fight ensues. Finally there are these ones will do anything to win altercation: dirty fighters.


"Professionals": These people are typically men but can also be women. They spend all of their time in the gym, and can do some major damage on anybody who is unfortunate enough to get into a fight with them. They prefer not to fight and generally will not until severely provoked. Without provocation, they do not want to fight and this is how they differ from reckless fighters. "Professionals" will brag about their skills so often that very few will provoke them; some are even afraid to get on their bad side. Their muscles are as big as one man's head (hyperbole). They are who some refer to as being on “roids” because there is no way a human can work out as much as they do.  However where they excel in the force behind a punch, they are slow to react and not very flexible because there is so much mass to their bodies. So the key to defeating a "professional" is to get them on the ground for grappling or to keep moving and just land enough good punches; just tire them out enough that they can no longer fight, stay light on the feet and do not give up.


"Defensive": These fighters will not provoke nor will they give into provocation until the opponent throws the first punch. They will not brag and only their closest friends will have knowledge of their skills. People will overlook them which is what makes them the most dangerous of all the fighters. Until that one person decides to bully them, push them around, basically seek them out and provoke until the defensive person decides to stand up to the bully and instead of a cease fire the bully takes it a step further and the fight ensues. Once the fighting begins this person surprises everyone by demonstrating some MMA or Judo skills that never would have been expected, in what was supposed to be a street fight. There is really no way to defeat a defensive fighter, unless the opponent has the same skills, basically just do not bully and provoke someone who seems helpless because chances are they aren't.


"Reckless ":  These fighters are not a big deal (litote) unless you do not feel like getting into an altercation with one wrong word. They typically are immature, confrontational, over-compensating men, what many would call a jerk (bathos). Many people find them exceedingly annoying. These "reckless” fighters will often be washed up middle aged guys that used to be the varsity quarterback, popular pretty boy in high school. They try to relive their "glory days" by acting superior to others and like they can kick anybody's butt. They often have their buddies there to back them up and will be ready to start something with someone twice their size. Really these fighters are not a threat; mostly they are considered more of a nuisance than anything. The most common place to find them is in a bar when they go out and eat, drink, yell, and fight (Parallel structure) with all of their buddies on Saturday nights. The best way to defeat these men is to avoid them completely when they start getting loud and in the mood to tussle because there is no avoiding it once they set their sights on a certain person.


"Girly": Girly fighters are those that have no idea how to fight. They base their lives off of stupid cliché movies and television shows with the typical mean girl.  These are the preppy girls that are afraid to break a nail and yet put down everybody that they meet unless they are exactly like them; basically they dish it out but can not take it. Girly fighters tend to grow up once they graduate high school but some take it to college. These girls can be seen from a mile away. They are almost always wearing heels or at least some type of dress or skirt. Their makeup and hair obviously took hours to prepare, almost like a cake; they make the normal girls feel inferior in every way that they can. When they walk they intentionally swing their hips as much as they can, it is not just confidence they convey, they think they are better than everybody else and that is the key to what lands them in a fight in the first place. These girls talk so much and think that they are loved but in reality they are despised by many. One day they pop off to the wrong person and end up in an altercation where they are kicking, pulling hair, slapping, and yet still spouting insults. The best way to deal with these girls is to just knock them out and accept the consequences.


“Novice”: These can be one of two types of novice fighters. One is the person that was raised in a sheltered home. Their parents did not condone fighting in any way possible, and any talk of this kind of violence would end in punishment. They are the ones that friends would tease for being innocent. When a fight begins they run and get a teacher or someone that could end it. If it came to a fight between them and another person they would probably take up the fetal position until the opponent felt bad and just gave up. The other type is the man or woman that takes up classes so that he or she can learn how to fight. They are new to the sport but are plenty willing for their heads to be filled with knowledge. They want to be taught and will put in the extra effort to learn every move perfectly before they show the instructor. These are the perfect pupil.


"Dirty": There is no way to tell them apart from any other person until one steps into the ring with them. However in the ring they are always the loudest and the rudest. They throw cheap shots that do severe damage to a person. They do "low blows" or hit their opponent in the back of the head where the brain stem meets the spine. Their only concerns are putting on a good show and winning the fight in any way possible. These "dirty" fighters do not care if their opponent leaves the battlefield in one piece. They go straight to the places that do the uttermost damage that is sometimes irreversible. They may have the professional job of being able to fight in the octagon but they have no right to be in their because they just cheat. Even if they are not an actual professional they will act as if they were, behind “defensive” fighters these are the most dangerous. If given the unfortunate task of fighting one of these people a person will know instantly and the same goes for them as for the "girly" fighters. Knock them out immediately.


The author's comments:

I learned how to fight as a little girl so when presented with the topic of classification my mind automatically went to fighters because each fighter is different and has different techniques. I figured maybe this could help even if in only the slightest bit.


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