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You don’t know how it feels. You don’t know what it’s like to fall in love with someone and not even have him recognize you. You think about him every day and every night before you go to bed and even at random moments in the day. You fantasize about what could happen between you, but all of the time knowing that you’ll never get an opportunity like that with him. He doesn’t know how you feel because you are too nervous, too scared of the outcome, too shy to speak your mind. You find yourself listening to songs over and over that remind you of him, listening to the lyrics carefully because they say everything you can’t. You stay hidden, you don’t dare speak up, while you watch him flirt and flaunt about, never knowing you are constantly in his shadow. You try to keep your head up and pretend you are only friends, but always wishing something more might come out of it. You remember every moment you’ve ever spent with him, because a memory is all you have to hold on to. You don’t have his shoulder to cry on, or his hand to hold when you’re lonely or his jacket to keep you warm. No. All you have is the memory of his sweet smile and sparkling eyes, constantly overlooking what is right in front of him. You keep thinking that by the little actions he does he might actually like you, but you can never tell because he will then ignore you. You can’t tell if he might have feelings for you because he acts differently every time. You try to find ways to tell him, avoiding the awkward question “Do you like me?” or outright telling him, “I like you.” And the one time you have found that nerve, that passion, the one time you are ready to open up to him, and tell him the deeper feelings that you have kept hidden, it turns out, he isn’t the one listening.

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