Stepping Out | Teen Ink

Stepping Out

January 12, 2017
By Avita-Wilder BRONZE, Gainesville, Florida
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Avita-Wilder BRONZE, Gainesville, Florida
2 articles 0 photos 1 comment

Favorite Quote:
"The day I stop dreaming is the day I stop living"


Author's note:

In my own life I have had to step out of my own comfort zone many times. 

The room was small but it’s blank walls made Cordelia feel tiny. She stood in the middle of the mirrored room her image mocking her elaborate attire. She knew they were watching. she didn’t want to seem vain so she tried not to straighten her curls too much. She did though straighten her dress to look neat and proper. she stood up to her full height letting her silk dress fall over her skin. Ever so softly it straightened itself out trying to make it’s mistress happy. Finally content with her appearance she let her mind wander. She thought of the day when the VBP officers brought the letter to her door.

Cordelia had been sitting in her room looking into the mirror, not necessarily at herself but at the people all around her. She looked past her rosy cheeks and emerald eyes and at the maids that were braiding her hair into elaborate updos on top of her head. She tried sitting still but she still hated the extensive hours it took to get ready to go to a ball. The Theon's were about to celebrate their son’s partnership with one of the Wilkinson girls. No one was surprised when it happened. Most partnerships that happened for upper stages were usually with people that their parents wanted them with. Any sum of money, especially a large sum could persuade any VBP officer to put two people together. For the other stages it was different with just enough money to get by most didn’t have the expenses to pair their children up. Her mother used to tell her stories where people partnered for love not by chance or money. She used to admire the people from the stories, but she never thought of it any more than a simple fairy tale that her mother would tell her before sending her off to sleep. In Ineon  she knew people didn’t marry for love but rather for family growth or just by chance. She stood in awe of stories like her parents who were randomly selected for each other but fell madly in love at first sight, or at least that’s what she imagined. As the years drew closer to when she herself would receive a partner more and more she dreamed of the man she would be paired with. He would have black hair, brown eyes, and be dressed in the finest satin in the land. Though as her friends were partnered one by one she only grew to hope that she would find love, not some handsome man with money to spend on her but someone who would rather share in her passions and interests.

As she stared past her reflection a knock came at the door. One of the many maids went to open the door. Opening it a crack Cordelia heard her gasp from across the room. Turning around on the chair she saw that the maid had opened the door further to reveal a VBP officer standing there. It was not unusual for an officer to be in her home, her father, after all, was one of the seven councilmen who ran Ineon . Even then they stayed on the first level discussing important matter, never had one come up to her room before; never holding a letter. Her mind started running a hundred miles an hour as she saw the envelope in his hand. It was starch white with a red seal in the center. She recognized it the second the door was opened. It was her letter! The one every girl would get after her seventeenth birthday. The letter which invited her down to headquarters where she would be assigned her partner. Some of her maids started squealing remembering their days while others lustfully looked at it, having not yet received one. The noises and the stares were oblivious to Cordelia as she stood and walked over to the door to accept the letter.

A door creaked and Cordelia glanced up from the ground breaking her day dream. A VBP officer strode across the room. Her light brown hair was tied tightly back at the nape of her neck and her brown eyes glared out from under thick glasses. The usual VBP uniform of, the tan button up suit, was crisp with not a single wrinkle showing. The women held a clipboard in her hands thick with paper. Without a word she looked at the scared girl who stood before her up and down. Jotting down a few notes on her clipboard she nodded towards the door which she came from and in strode another officer who's dressed was identical. He held a book in his hand and opened a peered at the contents inside. He looked at the women’s notes as he compared a file that stuck out of his book. Neither said anything as they worked and Cordelia stood there unsure of what to do. The two finally nodded affirmation to one another and left the room leaving her standing alone once more in the small room. A few minutes passed and Cordelia started to resent wearing heels that day when the door swung open again and the female VBP officer stepped in first. She cleared her throat, “Ms. Cordelia Night” her voice was cold but sophisticated and she added to her grace by swinging her arm in great emphasis towards Cordelia. From the shadows of the hallway a young man stepped into the room. His eyes stared at the ground and his hands were stuffed into the pockets of his worn dirt jeans. His hair was long and unbrushed but his face was clean. His shirt was washed and pressed but definitely not new as it was thin and had started to fray at the bottom. He looked up at her and she saw that his eyes were a light blue that glimmered under the single light that hung in the middle of the room.

Cordelia stared at the strange man, even her father’s servants wore nicer clothes than he did, and at least they brush their hair, she thought at another glance. This was the man she was to be paired with?! She looked at him again and again shocked that this was who the system had put her with. He looked like a Six! It was extremely rare for someone to be paired outside of their own section but it was unheard for someone who had come from a Two to be paired with a Six. The Sixes were known for their hardworking nature, for it was them who ran the factories which insured the property of Ineon . They were usually covered to head to toe in soot and you could smell them a mile away because of the distinct oil that leaked onto their clothes from the machines they toiled underneath.

A Two would rather be dead than caught standing next to a Six, even though that possibility was implausible; for each section hardly ever interacted with one another. Ineon in it’s creation had been divided into six sections. Every citizen was placed in a section due to their financial position and the job they were most qualified for. One’s and Two’s ran the country and held the most money. The only difference between them was the linage from the beginning of the nation’s formation. Three’s and Four’s were the educators, scientists, and doctors. They were known for their intelligence and progress into the modern world. Five’s were known for their creativity, for their lives were dedicated to the arts. They were also the ones who were dedicated to serving others. For generations Five’s had raised the upper sections children, and helped lead great households into prosperity; and for that they were proud. The Six’s were almost never seen by people from upper stages. They spent their days in the fields and in the factories. They worked hard so the upper sections could live comfortably while they lived in slums.

The land itself was shaped into a circle with six walls forming the six circular sections that the people lived within. One’s sat in the center with the capital looking out into the country and then the Six’s lived on the outskirts next to the great walls that separated them from nothingness. Two long roads went through each sections cutting the circle in half. In each district the houses and the working units were in every other quarter. The first five rings were perfectly symmetrical with houses lining up with one another and offices looking all the same. The sixth ring had houses sprawled across its quarters. On one half of the circle two smaller ones protruded from the great walls. Those were where the farmers would walk each day and to pray for rain to come. The great wall surrounded the three circles enclosing it and it’s way of life from the rest of the world.

Most people who lived in the sections from four and up had never seen the great wall up close and most of them never would. Cordelia herself had never gone past the gates that divided the Two’s from the Three’s. If she was to be paired with this man she would enter a world that she had never even dreamed about. She looked back at him and wondered what home was for him. She knew it couldn’t be the luxurious house she was used to be she could not even fathom how rugged the slums really were from which he had come.  Her thoughts took her far away from the room where they stood and she didn’t come back until she heard the VBP clear her throat. She looked up quickly and saw that everyone was looking at her including the man from section Six. She stood up straighter as the man began inspecting her. His eyes watched her fingers move back and forth nervously. The two made eye contact and the boy looked down at his feet before Cordelia could say anything. The VBP once again cleared her throat and everyone focused on her. “Ms. Cordelia Night,” she began again, “may I introduce Ryker Swallow.” She didn’t gesture towards him nor even give him more of a short glance in his general direction. Again the man looked at her this time with them both knowing the formal titles of addressing one another by.

Both VBP’s began their speech on the rules of partnership. They rambled on about the testing period which was six months to decided if the match was suitable or not. Cordelia looked at her hands as the officers spoke. Could she do this, should she? Partner a man from the other side of the system. Her father would definitely pay her way out if she wanted to. Why should she stay with him. Her father had always intended her to marry someone from her stage, specifically her childhood friend, Sebastian Norcross. Why should she partner with a total stranger when a man she had grown up with was willing to partner with her, a man who she knew would care for her. The letter and the drive to the VBP office was just a formality no one expected her to stay with the man she was partnered with. Though the idea of not simply living the life that was expected of her was exhilarating. While she began to drift off into her world of dreams she heard a voice booming in the hallway. It became louder as it grew closer and soon the door to the little room was slammed against its hinges. A man stood in the entryway fuming. His pudgy hand was still held against the door and his fingers were white with anger.

“How dare you pair my daughter with this piece of s*** from section Six!”

“Sir, sir-” the boy’s officer tried to intervene but to no avail.

“Don’t you sir, me! You know who I am and who my daughter is. Why would you, with your little pea brain, ever think that it was socially acceptable for her to be paired with this scum?” he gestured to the boy who Cordelia noticed had stood up straighter and had every muscle in his body tense.

“Father...” Cordelia walked towards her father with an arm outstretched. He swatted the arm away and then turned his fury upon her.

“And you...” he began “why can’t you stand up for yourself for once! Always sulking away from things that have to be done. You know what is expected of you, you know that you will be partnered with Sebastian and no-”

“What if I don’t want to?!” Cordelia yelled at him for the first time in her life. With those six words everything went quiet. The officers who were trying to calm the angry man and call for security and her father who had been frantically waving his arms above his head all stopped at the sound of her voice.

“What?” his voice was quiet and was said through clenched teeth.

“What if I didn’t...” her voice started firm but trailed off with each word.

“I don’t have time for this!” he grabbed her arm and started to drag her out of the building. Pulling back she staggered away from her father, backing up against a nearby wall. He spun around and glared at her but then in turn started his yelling again at the VBP’s. At this they threw down the clipboard and the book they were holding in their hands and started to “talk” with the unreasonable man who stood in front of them. Cordelia noticed a piece of paper that had slipped from the man’s book. It was a piece of yellow paper with a picture of the boy in the left corner. Under the photo the words, “Ryker Swallow due for assignment for the Cogadh in three days”. Cordelia looked closer to make sure her eyes were not playing a trick on her; yes, Cogadh was written there.  The word sent a shiver down her back and she stepped away from the paper and looked at Ryker. No one knew what the Cogadh was, all that the people knew was that men were sent off to join it and then they were never heard from again. If a man was not partnered by the age of twenty he was sent off to the Cogadh. She looked at the paper again and stared at the line and realized that he must be turning twenty in three days.

It all made sense to her now. His officer was trying to find a way that he could stay and not leave for the Cogadh. She looked at him again. He stood there in the middle of the room with his arms crossed against his chest staring at the floor. Her father still yelled at the VBP’s and security had arrived on the scene to make his anger worse. He would be upset with her if she left. She knew that if she left she would never be able to go back to her home again. Then she thought of the six month trial period. If she couldn’t make it in his world she could always come back to her own. Once more she turned her attention to the man that was called to the Cogadh. How could she let it happen when she had the power to change the man’s future; hopefully for the better. She inhaled slowly and let the air out before she walked towards her father once more. Walking straight through the torrent of angry people she simply put her hand against her father’s arm and he went silent. Without saying anything she walked out the door and into the hallway, her father following her every move with a smile plastered on his face. She could feel the eyes that stared at her as she walked out of the room. The security guards followed them out but the VBP’s and the boy was left there watching them leave. Once the door was closed and they were far enough away from the door that their voices were not going to be heard Cordelia turned around and looked at her father in the eyes. Never before would she have ever defied him nor try to disappoint him, especially after the death of her mother when she was little.

“Father,” she took another breath and tried to collect her thoughts, “just listen before you say anything. Please...just let me talk.” and for the first time he listened. He listened as she told him about the boy’s future and how she had the power to change it. He listened as he watched his little girl grow up before his eyes. He saw the compassion that was in her eyes and he felt her love as she made gestures with her hands. He saw her become the woman who her mother had raised her to be. No longer did he see a small child standing in a room afraid and waiting for her father to bust into the room to save her. When she had finished speaking he stood there a moment in silence unsure of what to say. He never said anything as he embraced his daughter and let a single tear slip down his cheek. He slowly let go and kissed her forehead and turned towards the exit. Without turning around he let his last words to her fade into the wind, “I’m proud of you.”

Cordelia watched him as he left the building and walked towards his car. She held herself against the wall as she wanted to run after him and leave this adventure behind her. As his car slowly pulled out she turned around and walked once more to the room where Ryker Swallow stood. Pushing the door open she walked into the room where all of the eyes were on her including the boy whose eyes were wide with surprise. She had picked him...even though he was a Six. Her officer walked towards her holding the clipboard once again. She held out a pen and pointed to a dotted line that was at the end of the page. Taking the pen in her’s she signed her name with gusto, willing life to take her where it wanted. She then watched as the same officer brought the paper over to Ryker where he wrote a simple X on the line. In that quiet moment they were paired. She knew that there would be no celebration, no party where all her friends would be, but still in that moment she felt at peace with the decision that she had made.

In under thirty minutes the pair was sitting in a black car riding to their new home. Cordelia watched Ryker as he gawked at the inside of the vehicle. It dawned on her that he might have never been in a limo before maybe even a car. His fingers ran over the leather seats gently as if not to stain them. She looked out her own window and watched the familiar land begin to fade away. The office buildings, which in the center of Ineon were six stories tall, became smaller in each stage that they entered. Soon the once elaborate buildings turned into a small one room cement buildings. Ineon being shaped like a circle the business part of a stage and the homes were separated into fourths. A road ran down the middle of the stages leading into each quarter, while a small aqueduct ran through the middle cut on the other side. The car went down the long road and passed by each stage going through the large gates that separated the people. When the came into the last ring of Ineon they turned left entering a dirty neighborhood full of wooden shacks that stood for houses. Cordelia had never seen homes this small or this unkempt. The home she had grown up in was a two story mansion with a garden that led into her massive backyard.

Ryker leaned forwards as he looked at a house as they passed. Cordelia wondered if that was his home. The whole house itself was smaller then her dining room. Her heart began to beat rapidly as the car raced on. What if she wasn’t able to do this? She thought of the last words that her father said to her and she clamped her hands together. She would make him proud, him and her mother. Looking at the window again she could see the large grey factories that stood against the great wall that divided them from nothingness. She wondered if the factory she was looking at was the one that Ryker spent his days in. Her thoughts continued as they drove through the slums, constantly questioning her original purpose for this expedition. The thoughts came to an end as they pulled up on the curb of an empty wooden house.

She watched as the VBP’s stepped out of the car followed by Ryker. Slowly she too vacated the vehicle. Stepping onto the ground, she realized that it was not the best day to wear heels. Shaking the dirt from her shoe she balanced herself and looked up at the house. So this was to be her new home? It certainly didn’t look like much with it’s wooden boards sprawled out on the brown grass. It had a small porch with two windows looking out. The glass was cracked and cobwebs could be seen in the crevices of where the glass once stood. The roof had holes in it where the tiles had fallen off and were hanging on for dear life. Coming closer she noticed that all eyes were on her-no all eyes were on her gaping mouth. She shut it quickly and turned away from the preying eyes. Walking towards the door she reached out for a doorknob that wasn’t there. Slightly taken aback she then pushed on the door and listened to it creak as it was pried from its hinges.
Walking into the room Cordelia took in her surroundings. The house was a simple four wall framework with only one section in the house divided by the rest. In the far left corner two curtains were draped over the wooden beams that protrude from the ceiling. The material was coarse and filthy with ragged holes that allowed her to peer through into the room. A bed, if you can call it that, lay on top of two neatly folded grey blankets. One was thin enough to be a sheet while the other that rested beneath it was quite thick. She turned away from the bedroom and looked towards an area in the house that she took for the kitchen. An old iron stove stood under a round hole in the roof where a long pipe led from inside the furnace to the cold world that waited outside. There was a large box next to the stove where a big metal bucket sat collecting dust. Two smaller boxes sat on either side of it waiting to be used. She took a step towards the last section of the house; the wood creaked and moaned under her feet from the weight. The window with it’s broken glass let her see an old sofa that smelled of mold that sat underneath another broken window. Glass shards were scattered on the fabric and the old cloth that covered the coach was filled with dark stains from it’s former life.

A loud bang made her turn around quickly to see Ryker drop one of her large trunks onto the creaking floorboards. He looked at her and coughed as dust from the floor flew into his face. Turning on his heels he walked back to the car where the VIP officer stood. Since she had come into the house a truck had pulled onto the yard filled with her trunks containing her personal things. Walking onto the porch once more she watched as men started to unload her belongings one trunk at a time. There were five trunks altogether. Each trunk was a starch white with brass handles on each side for ease of carrying. Four of the five trunks were three feet long and two feet wide. The fifth one was only a foot long and a half of a foot wide, it also had little roses painted on two sides with exquisite detail. This one she took in herself and set it upon the small box-like table next to the metal bin. She looked around at her boxes. This was only half of her belongings but she knew this was all she was ever to see again. She knew that if one decided to go down in ranks they are only permitted to take half of their belongings; of course the half of their choosing. She thought back to earlier in the week when she had begun to pack her things neatly in their designed boxes. If she had only known where she might have been later that week she knew she would have packed differently. For most of “pretty” things were in the boxes that she had chosen before she had seen Ryker. She now regretted not packing blankets and other things that were necessities rather than dresses that filled three of the five containers. She looked towards Ryker and wondered when his trunks would arrive. Considering he lived in this district she thought that they would have arrived sooner than her items. As Ryker brought in the fourth container she asked him just that. Without a word he grunted and nodded towards a brown bag that lay on the rugged sofa. The bag was almost the same size as her smallest trunk, how on earth was he able to fit all of his personal items in there? She didn’t question him further as he set down the trunk and began muttering under his breath about what could possibly be in the trunks for them to weigh as much as they did.

She followed him out when he had brought in the final trunk and set it next to the others. Before walking out the door she looked over her shoulders to see that her five trunks filled up the living space of which they now both shared. Feeling somewhat embarrassed she walked down the few steps to the grass. They both walked towards the VIP officer who continued to look at her watch counting down the seconds until she could leave this forgotten place. Once she saw that everything was in order and the truck was empty she handed Ryker a small piece of paper and then turned to climb into the seat of the now empty car. Ryker walked over to the men who helped him unload the trunks who were climbing into the back of the truck. He leaned up while they leaned down and shook each man's hand as his only form of gratitude for their work. A few nodded and laughed while others simply stared off into space, either way they all drifted away as the truck followed the car down the dirt road it had come up.

Never saying a word Ryker walked around to the back of the house and disappeared leaving Cordelia alone next to the road. She started to wonder if she had made the wrong choice in staying. Thinking of her home with her father and a warm bed, her eyes began to water. Wanting no one to see them she rubbed her gloved hand against her eyes and headed for the house. As she entered she saw Ryker through a back window working on the fence that had started to fall apart. She watched for awhile admiring his cleverness to fix something without nails and a hammer. Realizing she had been standing there too long she looked at her boxes and decided to start unpacking some of her more necessary items for living. She headed towards her first box and opened the delicate lid carefully and looked inside at the small relics that lay scattered around. A picture of her mother lay on the top in a gold frame. She stroked the frame gently and then picked it up and put it aside. She did this with every article from the box deciding what to take out and what to keep hidden. Once she had finished this small task she looked around to where she could place her treasures. There were a few boards nailed to the wall creating a shelf next to the sofa. There she put the picture of her mother, a lace doily, and a small porcelain doll. Putting the small box next to the bed she sighed as she poked the mattress. Turning around she headed towards another one of her trunks where a large white comforter lay alongside two fluffy pillows. Pulling the white mass out she dragged it across the room and threw it upon the bed. Looking down she recognized the dirt that she has swept into a pile with the blanket. Looking around she found a rubbish broom standing next to the stove. She pushed the boxes into the secluded area in the house and began to sweep. The sweeping led to moping, where she used an old nightgown for a rag.
As one chore led to another one she failed to notice the light outside beginning to diminish. When Ryker finally came inside long past dusk he was greeted by a clean house. There were no cobwebs hanging in the corner and the glass that had once graced the floor was cleared. The old cloth that had once covered the couch was gone and in its stead was a clean white sheet. Laying across the coach was Cordelia. The hem of her dress was dark from dirt and her hands and face were smeared with soot. Seeing this Ryker looked back to the stove which glistened from the light of a nearby candlestick. The sleeping mass turned over her back now facing him. He walked around pacing back and forth in the confined areas looking at the work that she had achieved. The curtains that divided the small house were the only thing that looked out of place for the same dirty hole filled material hung from the ceiling. It was evident that she had fought to get them down but the fabric was tightly nailed to the wood, and so after several efforts she had given up and moved onto another chore. Pushing the curtain away he walked into the enclosed area and felt the blanket that now covered the bed. How soft it was to his calloused hands. Wiping away dirt he sat down slowly and felt like he was floating on a cloud. Through a hole in the fabric he watched her roll back and forth on the narrow couch, clutching at her shoulders. Looking around he grabbed the thick blanket that lay folded at the end of the bed. Fanning it out, he then carefully laid it atop her shivering body, to try and stop the cold as it snuck through the boards in the walls. Turning away he entered the makeshift room and laid down upon the bed.



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