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Bad Habit

Celestexoxo
Bad Habit
Summary:

This was a short story piece for my writing class!!! 

Getting everything handed to her causes Nicolette to miss out on the actual struggles throughtout her classmates. When her car breaks down, and none other than high schools bad boy, Julien come to her resucse Nicolette learns that to some, you have to work for what you want. Soon she finds herself thrown into his cruel world and wanting more of what he provides, even if she ends up loosing herself in the process. 







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This book has 10 comments. Post your own now!

Amai-kunThis teenager is a 'regular' and has contributed a lot of work, comments and/or forum posts, and has received many votes and high ratings over a long period of time. This work has been published in the Teen Ink monthly print magazine. said...
Apr. 6, 2015 at 6:23 am
Chapter 4- I'm still getting a bit of emotional whiplash. I wish the emotions weren't so quick to change. Other than that, you've got a good plot. You just have to fix up the details.
 
Amai-kunThis teenager is a 'regular' and has contributed a lot of work, comments and/or forum posts, and has received many votes and high ratings over a long period of time. This work has been published in the Teen Ink monthly print magazine. said...
Apr. 6, 2015 at 6:21 am
Chapter 3- this is moving rather quickly to me. I think slowing down the pace would make this more realistic. Just a few hours prior to this chapter, she very much disliked Julien, and now she's in love with him. Of course, there are also the typical grammar errors here.
 
Amai-kunThis teenager is a 'regular' and has contributed a lot of work, comments and/or forum posts, and has received many votes and high ratings over a long period of time. This work has been published in the Teen Ink monthly print magazine. said...
Apr. 6, 2015 at 6:18 am
Chapter 2- I think this might be getting a little bit cliche in the sense that the main character gets into trouble with someone trying to sexually harass them and the love interest saves them.
 
Amai-kunThis teenager is a 'regular' and has contributed a lot of work, comments and/or forum posts, and has received many votes and high ratings over a long period of time. This work has been published in the Teen Ink monthly print magazine. said...
Apr. 6, 2015 at 5:53 am
Chapter 1- I think the reader needs a better image of Julien. All we know about him is that he's male, but we don't know anything else about his- or Nicolette's- appearance. Also, I think we could use more detail in general as opposed to dialogue.
 
Amai-kunThis teenager is a 'regular' and has contributed a lot of work, comments and/or forum posts, and has received many votes and high ratings over a long period of time. This work has been published in the Teen Ink monthly print magazine. said...
Apr. 6, 2015 at 5:46 am
Just from the prologue, my recommendation is to edit a bit more to fix the flow and grammatical errors. However, this does sound interesting.
 
HammadWaseemThis teenager is a 'regular' and has contributed a lot of work, comments and/or forum posts, and has received many votes and high ratings over a long period of time. said...
Apr. 4, 2015 at 1:22 pm
Thats great! Good job! @Celestexoxo will you check and comment on mine? :) TeenInk.com/video/dancing/114206/The-Unbeatable-Breakdancer
 
Emerald W. said...
Apr. 3, 2015 at 5:01 pm
I actually like your book and I think you should have continued
 
Celestexoxo replied...
Apr. 3, 2015 at 7:01 pm
Thank you! I think I will begin to make this a novel instead of a short story
 
emerald replied...
Apr. 13, 2015 at 1:25 am
I'll definitely read it
 
Emerald W. replied...
Apr. 13, 2015 at 1:26 am
I'll definitely read it
 

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