Prom Night | Teen Ink

Prom Night

May 11, 2011
By bigpapajd24, Houston, Texas
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bigpapajd24, Houston, Texas
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Author's note: I think there is a little bit of a nerd in all of us, whether we are obsessed with manga, naive in the art of socializing, or completely horrible with the opposite sex. We have at least one or more aspects of the cliched view of a nerd. I hope everyone that reads it enjoys it and finds it relatable

“Glasses”, looking in the bathroom mirror, Dexter straightened his horned rimmed glasses until they were perfectly level on his face. “Check!”, with a black sharpie, Dexter excitedly made a check mark on his ‘Prom Night List’ on his bathroom sink. “Teeth”, Dexter brushed his braces-filled teeth. He made sure to dig this afternoon’s hot dog and this morning’s oatmeal out of the crevices of the metal monstrosity in his mouth. Once he was done, Dexter smiled broadly in the mirror to check out his handiwork. The combined glare from his large glasses and his braces was almost enough to temporarily blind him, but he was satisfied. “Score!”, Dexter made a mighty fist pump to the ceiling, almost making his uncoordinated body tumble to the ground. Dexter didn’t care, for he was on cloud nine. Dexter was excited because in a few hours he would be at his school prom and he wouldn’t be going solo. Much to everyone’s surprise, Dexter managed to find a date at the very last minute.
“Tuxedo”, Dexter looked down at his neon blue tuxedo and frowned. “Maybe I should have brushed my teeth before I put my tuxedo on…”, Dexter groaned to himself, staring down at the several tooth paste splatters all over his blue jacket and white shirt. Shaking off the minor speed bump in his night, Dexter looked at what was next on his list. “Pants and belt”, Dexter took a glance at his reflection in the mirror and made a slight clicking noise with his tongue. “Oh this won’t do…”, unbuckling his belt buckle, he holstered his blue pants an inch above his belly button and realigned the belt buckle to the sixth hole of his belt. Dexter grabbed his list and made another check with his sharpie. “Okay one more thing”, Dexter frantically looked around in his bathroom. “Where are my shoes?” he asked himself this question as he left the bathroom and paced around in his bedroom searching for his shoes. He peered behind his life-size poster board of Yusuke from Yu Yu Hakasho but his shoes weren’t there. He looked for them by his bookshelf full of Japanese comic books, but they weren’t there either. Thoroughly puzzled, Dexter stood in the middle of his room with his hands on his hips. His eyes swept over all of the Japanese weapons and the different anime posters on his walls, ranging from Bleach to Hamtaro, as his mind mentally retraced his steps. A sudden glint of blue caught the corner of his eye from under the bed. “There you are!” Dexter exclaimed happily as he crawled under his bed to grab his grandfather’s old blue suede shoes. As he was pulling himself to his feet, the top of his head slammed against the bed. “Ouch!” Dexter yelped, immediately rubbing his head back and forth.

“Aw don’t cry…”

“I won’t cry” Dexter tried hard to fight back the tears that already started to well in his eyes. “Wait who said that?” Dexter swiveled his head around his room but no one was there.

“Come on don’t startle the boy…” another voice seemed to have come out of nowhere.

“Yusuke is that you?” Dexter looked suspiciously at the life-size poster board.

“Yes it is I, Yusuke! Your guardian poster board angel that has is here to save the day! Spirit Gun!”, the first voice declared. Dexter covered his eyes with his hands for he knew how powerful the Spirit Gun was. “Oh brother…down here dimwit!

“Don’t scream at him. He’s just a little frightened that’s all.” The second voice said defensively. Dexter pulled his hands away from his eyes and looked into the soles of his shoes. Two little men, no taller than two inches tall and dressed in long white robes, waved at him.

“Tada!” said the first voice sarcastically who turned out to be the man in his right shoe.

“Uh, who are you guys?”

“I’m Remington and this is Thaddcus. We are here to help you”, said Remington who was the man in the left shoe. Dexter’s eyebrows raised; His face slowly changed from complete skepticism to uncontrollable excitement.

“You guys are like the little men from the Nan to Jo sensei manga issued in 1998! Oh man! The kids from the convention are never going to be believe this!”, the two little men watched curiously as Dexter ranted about his new superiority to the other kids at the Japanese anime convention. “They will all bow at my feet! An-“

“Oh my…” Remington looked appalled.

“This kid is insane! Man, I know Daniel said he needed some work but c’mon! This is hopeless…” Thaddcus declared. Dexter returned to reality when he heard his dead grandfather’s name.

“Daniel. Like Daniel Sky?”

“Yep. You see…he sent us here.” Dexter looked confused.

“How? He passed away about a year ago.”

“Yeah, we know. He throws some crazy parties in heav-“ Thaddcus thoughtfully looked up at the ceiling.

“Shhhh. We don’t want to scare him now.” But it was too late. Dexter grabbed his shoes and hurled them across the room. With a bang, his shoes slammed against the far wall and the two little men tumbled out.

“Ghosts! Little tiny ghosts! Wha-What is going on? Are you here to haunt me?” Dexter skirted away behind Yusuke and his hands shook uncontrollably. He tried desperately to make sense of the situation.

“Why I outta…” Thaddcus shook his fist at Dexter, while rubbing his butt with the other hand, obviously in pain.

“You better start talking or I’ll….I’ll…”, Dexter looked around the room for something he could threaten them with. “I’ll vacuum you up!” Dexter ran to the corner of his room and hurriedly plugged in his Oreck vacuum into the outlet.

“So you pass up the Japanese samurai swords hanging on your wall for a vacuum cleaner? Good choice Ghost Buster”, the little man from the right shoe said sarcastically.

“I will do it!”, Dexter menacingly turned on the vacuum cleaner and it roared loudly.

“Stop! Okay here is the thing. We are your great great great great great great--um ancestors. We have come to help you out at the prom. Your grandfather, Daniel Sky, asked us to help because he knew how much prom night meant to you, so he wanted to make sure you had the best night of your life."

“He said that?” Dexter asked quizzically, dropping the vacuum to the ground.

“Yeah he said that! He didn’t want you to embarrass the whole family with your inability to do anything! Geez kid, you must have gone over that list a hundred times tonight. You even slept in your tux! That’s just tacky.”

“I didn’t want to forget it…” Dexter said with his head down. The little man from the left shoe pushed the other little man.

“Now why did you have to go and say all of that! Don’t worry Dexter, all you need is a little-“, the little man took a second look at Dexter, and spotted the tooth paste stains and his pants buckled at his belly button. “A lot of help.”

“Wait…why are my ancestors only two inches tall? Is this so you could hide from the large dinosaurs?”

“Oh this kid’s got jokes huh?” Thaddcus rolled up his sleeve. “Well I’ll give him something to laugh about.”

“Stop Thaddcus!” Remington barely held Thaddcus back from attacking Dexter. “God said it’s against the rules for us to have our normal bodies, so we just had to settle for these.”

“Ok…” Dexter still wasn’t quite sure that he believed that they were from heaven.

“Wait what time is it?”, Dexter looked at his large digital Timex watch.

“You put the watch ontop of your tux! Are you kidding, Dex?”

“7:00” Dexter said, ignoring the Thaddcus’s criticism.

“Okay go finished getting ready and we will meet you at prom okay?”

“Sure but how are you goi-“before Dexter finished his sentence Remington disappeared. The other man shook his head at Dexter before disappearing abruptly as well. Dexter stood in the middle of his room trying to take in what just happened.

“Dexter! Hurry up dear, you don’t want to be late”, his mother’s voice stirred Dexter back to action. He grabbed his shoes and ran downstairs. Dexter pumped his little legs as fast as they could go; he was halfway towards the back door when his father’s voice startled him.

“Think fast buckoo!”, Dexter turned to see an object hurtling towards him. Dexter’s lack of athleticism hindered him, because he couldn’t run and catch at the same time, or at all for that matter. The object nailed Dexter in the chest and he flopped to the ground as if had been shot. “Pathetic…there goes a father’s dream of raising a football player”, Dexter’s father scoffed, not helping his son from the ground.

“Well I wasn’t ready!” Dexter retorted, still trying to catch his breath from his near-death experience.

“It was a perfect pass son. All you had to do was open and close your hand”, Dexter’s father retorted, opening and closing his hands to demonstrate how to catch. Sighing to himself, he watched his son struggle to get back to his feet. “Come here boy, let me help ya. Don’t worry I’ll make a man out of you one of these days, because it’s obvious that Japanese mumbo jumbo isn’t doing the trick.” Dexter’s father made one more attempt at instilling manhood in his son by punching him playfully on the arm, hoping that his son would punch him back. All this accomplished was putting Dexter back on the floor.

“It is called Japanese manga, father”, Dexter spat. He was disgusted that his father mispronounced the name. Dexter’s father sighed again.

“Enjoy your prom son. And don’t mess with any of those fast girls because they are nothing but trouble”, Dexter’s father turned to walk away.

“Oh like those girls in Scorolax episode #22 season 4, with their blazing agility and speed? Don’t worry father, I don’t even like green girls but I’ll keep my eye out if I see one”

“Right son…you do that”, Dexter’s father kept on walking, for he didn’t want his son to see the disappointment on his face. Dexter noticed that the object that his father had thrown at him was actually his plastic blue boutonniere. Dexter hurriedly picked it up off the ground and rushed out the backdoor to the white Lexus in the driveway.

“Mother the light is green”, Dexter said to his mother who was trying to put lipstick on her mouth before the light changed.

“Oops, sorry dear! Don’t want to make you late to pick up your girlfriend.” Dexter’s mother beamed at him with her marvelously white teeth. Her high energy and positive attitude were infectious.
“She’s not my girlfriend. She’s just my friend who happens to be my date to the prom, mother”, an innocent boyish grin slowly appeared on his acne-filled face.
“Sure whatever you say…wink-wink. Well here we are!” The car slowed in front of a small brick one story house. Dexter climbed out of the car and walked solemnly to the front door. His legs started to feel heavier, and he became more and more nervous after every step. His white shirt was drenched like he had just walked through a rain storm. By the time he reached the door, his entire body was covered in sweat and he didn’t know how to function properly; He had suddenly forgotten how to speak, walk, or even breathe steadily. His breathes came in choppy staccatos, and it took all of his concentration and coordination for him to press the doorbell with his finger.

“Coming!” A girl’s shout came from inside the house. At that point, Dexter was about to black out. The door turned inward and before Dexter was a beautiful girl.

“Dexter!” The girl gave him a big hug but retracted it abruptly when she felt his sweat-drench shirt. She looked around outside. “Hey, has it been raining or something? Because you’re pretty wet, bud.” Dexter replied with an unintelligible babble that didn’t sound human. “What? Hey are you okay”, the girl asked concerned.
“Great look you Crystal”, apparently the words, his mouth, and his knowledge on grammar didn’t seem to be in sync.
“Thanks Yoda”, Crystal said with a laugh. Dexter began to laugh too and he continued to laugh several seconds after Crystal stopped laughing. The laughter slowly alleviated his uneasiness, and his senses returned to him. Finally taking in Crystal’s appearance fully, Dexter gasped. He had never seen any girl as beautiful as her. The moonlight struck her face in such a way that made her blue eyes shine like a cat, and it also gave an angelic sheen to her blonde hair that glowed in the night.
“Wow you look like Sailor Moon…”,
“What?”
“Nothing”
“Did you just compare me to one of those cartoon characters you watch?” Crystal asked suspiciously.
“No…yes”, Dexter was about to expound on the comparison between Sailor Moon and her, but he stopped when he spotted streak marks on Crystal’s face.
“Crystal have you been crying?” Dexter asked. Crystal immediately turned her head, guarding her face with her long blonde hair. Crystal took a long moment before speaking.
“Jason called me…he told me that he was going to bring his new girlfriend to prom. I might be a little upset at prom.” Crystal’s voice started to waiver and tremble, but thankfully a loud car horn broke the uncomfortable moment between the two.
“Come on sweeties! You guys look so adorable!” Dexter’s mom yelled from the car
“I guess we better get going…” Crystal put her head down and dragged her blue stilettos towards the car.
“Shotgun!” Dexter couldn’t miss out on this golden opportunity. He almost knocked Crystal over as he hopped in the front seat of the car. “Boo ya! Did you see that mother? I totally nabbed that shotgun; she didn’t even see it coming”.

“Yes you did Dexter. But don’t you think you should have opened the door for Crystal?” Dexter wasn’t listening.

“Let the night of debauchery and excellence begin!”

“One more picture!” Dexter’s mother couldn’t hold in her enthusiasm, neither could Dexter and Crystal hold in their groans. They had been at the Crawfield High School parking lot for thirty minutes taking pictures. They were the only ones in the parking lot when they first arrived, but now the lot was almost full and the dance had already started. “Okay cuties lean against the car again. Perfect.” Click! Dexter’s mother snapped the picture with her camera phone. “One more picture!”
“Mother you said that was the last one”
“You know ‘one more’ means three more for me”, Dexter’s mother winked at them. “Aww I remember when you guys use to sleep over at each other’s houses and have your little play dates. You guys were so adorable. Now you two are all grown up and dating! Where has the time gone?”
“Mother…”, Dexter tried to take control of his mother’s mind like his favorite villain Captain Ginyu, but his human limitations stopped him.
“Mrs. Zaharoias, I think we have to go, but it was nice seeing you again”, Crystal grabbed Dexter’s hand and hurried away from Dexter’s mother.
“Call me when the dance is over hun . Such a cute couple!”, Dexter’s face turned cherry red but he didn’t let go of Crystal’s hand. As the two were walking across the parking lot, they could almost feel the stares from the other kids.
“Is that Crystal with….”, Crystal and Dexter tried hard to block out the gossipy whispers as they headed towards the gym where the dance was held.
“Get you some Point Dexter!” a couple of students exclaimed as Dexter and Crystal walked by them.
“Oh I see you big Dex!” other students started screaming their approval of Dexter and his date. Dexter couldn’t believe what he was hearing. The very people that treated him like he was invisible were finally acknowledging his existence.
“Crystal…are you serious?”, this one jeering voice could be heard over all the cries of praise. Crystal stopped dead in her tracks. They both knew who was approaching, so they weren’t surprised when they turned and saw Jason coming their way with his new girlfriend. Jason’s spotless white tuxedo gleamed and he walked with a certain obnoxious cockiness. He smirked at Crystal and he wrapped his hands tightly around his beautiful brunette girl who walked beside him. “This is the best you could do?” Jason scoffed at Dexter. Crystal still couldn’t talk. She focused her attention on a particularly interesting crack on the cement ground. “I’m sorry I’m being incredibly rude. Sarah this is Crystal. Crystal this is my girlfriend Sarah”, Crystal flinched at the word ‘girlfriend’ but she still held her composure.
“Hello Sarah, my name is Dexter. Nice to meet you”, Dexter held his hand out cordially to Sarah, but Sarah looked repulsed.
“I understand if you are jealous Crystal. I mean I would be too if my date was”, She eyed Dexter up and down with scorn. “Well you know what I’m getting at. You had your chance Crystal, but you blew it. Now let’s go Jason”, Jason and Sarah walked past them and entered the gym. Crystal started to sob quietly and a single tear rolled down her face. Dexter didn’t know what to do so he scratched his head awkwardly and waited for her to stop crying.
“Comfort her dimwit!” Thaddcus suddenly appeared on his right shoulder.
“How?”, Dexter whispered anxiously.
“Pat her on the back and say some encouraging words”, said Remington who appeared on his opposite shoulder.
“Um it could be worse Crystal. He could have taken a demon warrior with immeasurable strength to prom. Now that would be bad…” He laughed uncomfortably but Crystal didn’t laugh with him. She rolled her eyes and turned her back to him.
“Oh I almost forgot…” Dexter said remembering the other part of the advice.
“This is going to be bad”, Remington said as he saw Dexter c*** back his arm.
“Real bad”, Thaddcus agreed. Dexter opened his palm and slammed it on the middle of Crystal’s back.
“What the hell Dexter!” Crystal roared. “Next time you want to comfort me just don’t, ok? Let’s just go inside to the stupid prom.” Crystal stormed away through the gym doors.
“I’m sorry”, Dexter stammered but Crystal was already gone.
“This is going to be a loooooong night”, the grouchy little man said.

“I gotta feeling, whooooo hooooo, that tonight’s gunna be a good night. That tonight’s gunna be a good night. That tonight’s gunna be a good good night. I gotta feeling!” From his seat, Dexter looked at the hundreds of Crawfield High School students who were dancing and singing, and having a fabulous time. Those who weren’t dancing were having a good time socializing. Even the chaperones from the walls of the gym bobbed their heads and tapped their feet rhythmically to the beat of the Black Eyed Peas song. Contrastingly, Dexter and Crystal sat at a far table away from everyone else. Crystal wasn’t really speaking to him, but instead she watched Jason and Sarah dance with venom.
“Look at them…he thinks he’s so cool right now dancing with that skank! She is practically all over him. God, what a hoe…” These were the first words Crystal has said to him since the outside incident. Dexter just nodded his head; he didn’t know what else to do. The two little men had gone dancing and they hadn’t returned. Dexter was getting increasingly worried that this was not going to turn out to be a good night at all.
“Tonight’s the night….let’s live it up! I got my money…let’s spend it up! Go out and smash it like oh my god! Man that’s my song!” Thaddcus suddenly appeared on Dexter’s right shoulder. Dexter was so surprised to hear the grouchy little man’s boisterous voice in his ear that he almost fell out of his seat.
“You okay Dexter?” Crystal asked, noticing his near catastrophe in the chair.
“Yeah…yeah I’m fine”, Dexter said. Then he realized something. “She can’t see you or hear you can she?”
“Nope. Nobody can except you. It’s like we are a figment of your imagination” Thaddcus said with a sly smile.
“Wait…are you?” Dexter asked suddenly worried that he had gone crazy. The little man boxed Dexter’s right ear. “Ouch!” Dexter yelped as a searing pain shot into his ear. Luckily, Crystal was still watching Jason so she didn’t notice.
“Could a figment do that? That was for throwing me at a wall. Yeah you thought I forgot that little incident didn’t you?” Dexter mumbled an apology.
“Man this is really cool! It’s like you are fro-“
“Stop! I don’t want to hear another stupid comic book or TV reference from you for the rest of the night. Got it?”
“But...”
“No.” the little man shook his head to emphasize his point. “Now how about you take that girl out to the dance floor instead of sitting here like a dimwit.”
“You’re so abusive”
“It comes with the job. Now go dance.”
“I don’t know how”, Dexter frowned. “And I’m scared she’ll say no”
“Grow a pair, will you? Just say ‘we are dancing. I will not take no for an answer’. Then after you say that walk-off and she will follow you. It’s all about confidence kid. Girls like guys with confidence”, the little man glanced over at Crystal. “That’s why your girl is going goo-goo eyed for that Jason kid. He has confidence.”
“It’s really that easy?”
“Plain and simple.” The mean little man said confidently. Suddenly the other little man appeared on Dexter’s left shoulder.
“The punch is delicious! You guys should really go tr-“ Remington noticed Dexter’s serious expression on his face. “Did I miss something?”
“Not yet. You are about to witness Dexter follow my expert advice”, the grouchy little man said proudly. “Watch and learn. Go show him, Dex.” Dexter got out of his chair. He took a single deep breath to control his jitters, and then he turned towards Crystal.
“Crystal?”
“She can’t even dance! Oh I’m sorry; what’s up Dexter?” Crystal turned her attention away from her ex-boyfriend and faced Dexter.
“We are dancing”, Dexter said emphatically. Not use to being so frank, Dexter nervously continued. “I mean if-if you want to because you don’t have to, but if you are in the dancing mood then we can. I understand if you are not in the dancing mood because you might be tired. I’m kind of tired myself. It’s been a long night, but I realized we haven’t danced yet so we should dance. Just-just one time?” Dexter was talking at hundred miles per minute and he couldn’t stop himself. Thaddcus slapped himself on the forehead.
“Confidence, boy! Confidence” he yelled in his ear.
“Oh right”, Dexter whispered to him. Dexter made a small 180 degree spin and walked away just like the little man had advised him too.
“So that was your advice?” Remington asked, stifling a laugh.
“Shut up! It would have worked-“
“If it weren’t for those meddling kids and that dumb dog right?” the nice little man couldn’t control his laughter any longer.
“Shut up!”
“Guys, is she following me?” Dexter asked excitedly. The little men turned, and to their surprise, Crystal was actually following them to the dance floor.
“Yes my advice is still working! In your face!” the mean little man celebrated on Dexter’s shoulder.
“Um…I still don’t know how to dance”, Dexter reminded. He was starting to get frantic because he didn’t want to completely embarrass himself.
“No sweat, Dex. It’s easy. All you do is move side to side like this”, the mean little man demonstrated on his shoulder. “If you feel the music move you then don’t be afraid to do your own thing.”
“Oh ok that doesn’t sound too hard”
“You can do it Dexter!” the nice little man said encouragingly. Dexter turned. Crystal was right there behind him smiling. She looked so beautiful that he immediately started doubting himself and his dancing abilities.
“Come on let’s dance”, Crystal said, grabbing his hand and leading him to an open spot on the dance floor. They stood a few feet apart and, awkwardly at first, began to dance. Crystal was a very good dancer. She gyrated her hips side to side and whipped her hair back and forth to the beat. Dexter, on the other hand, did a dance that consisted of shuffling his feet in place. “I love this song!” Crystal shouted over the booming sub woffers.
“He’s doing it! He’s actually doing something that can be interpreted as a dance!” Thaddcus said excitedly. Though there was always someone bumping and banging Dexter while he danced, he felt as if it was just him and Crystal on the floor. He closed his eyes and swayed; he felt the music.
“Show me your moves!” Crystal encouraged. That’s exactly what Dexter did. Dexter started to execute swift karate chops and punches in the air, and every so often he would jump and side kick for flare.

“I’m dancing…I’m really dancing!” Dexter exclaimed. He didn’t realize that some of his punches, karate chops, and kicks were actually making contact with some of the other people on the dance floor.

“What the hell?” A few people shouted after being karate chopped in the neck. Slowly, everyone took notice of Dexter’s bizarre dance.

“Um Dexter…” Crystal tried to stop him but she was laughing too hard.

“Hiya!” Dexter kicked a girl on her butt and she toppled to the ground. He spun around and accidently kicked another student in the stomach

“I can’t watch”, Remington disappeared after being flung from Dexter’s shoulder onto the ground during a particularly intense jump kick.

“You’re killing me kid”, Thaddcuz said disappointedly. He soon disappeared as well. In a few short minutes everyone was staring at Dexter’s eccentric dance. Some people were laughing, some people were shaking their heads, but most were just confused.

“What is he doing?”, seemed to be the question on everbody’s face. Since everyone was watching him, Dexter took the facial expression as “Keep going Dexter! Keep going!”. After seeing his rather interesting dance moves for awhile, people began to respect it. His moves were so inexplicably graceful and fluid that it was oddly good. Somewhere in the crowd, a chant had started.

“Go Dexter! Go Dexter! Go Dexter! Go Dexter!” Everyone was cheering him on at this point. Bright flashes of blue blinded him as people whipped out their cameras. Dexter did one more kick before throwing his arms in the air at the conclusion of the song. Everyone went ballistic. Classmates that Dexter had never spoken to before were patting him on the back and taking pictures with him. Dexter reveled in his four minutes of fame. He threw his hands up one more time and his classmates cheered and applauded.

“Maybe I should have put deodorant on my prom night list…” Dexter said to himself after smelling his armpits. Slightly embarrassed, Dexter scurried over, with his hands under his armpits, to the punch table to get a drink.

“Wow where did you learn to dance like that?” Dexter turned around to see Crystal smiling at him. Dexter shrugged his shoulders; he wasn’t quite sure either. “So do you want to dance some more?”

“Um…” Dexter didn’t want to tell Crystal that he was completely exhausted. He didn’t even know if he could move again after a performance like that.

“Come on don’t be a party pooper. It’s a slow song.” Crystal grabbed his hand again and Dexter’s heart fluttered.

“Go on Dexter. We’ll help you out.” The two little men reappeared on Dexter’s shoulder. Remington motioned Dexter to go dance with Crystal.

“Okay we can dance”, Dexter said a little reluctantly. His feet and legs were already starting to cramp up. Crystal strolled to the dance floor with Dexter limping slightly behind her. Crystal wrapped her hands around his neck, while Dexter stuffed his hands in his pockets.

“Put your hands around her waist”, Remington advised.

“Grab her butt!” Thaddcus shouted in Dexter’s ear.

“No don-“, but it was too late. Dexter cuffed his hands around Crystal’s backside.

“Dexter!” Crystal yelped. “Um don’t touch my butt. Thanks.” Dexter blushed and immediately dropped his hands.

“You can put your hands around her waist again,” the nice little man said. “Mr. Immature over here doesn’t know a single thing about being a smooth gentleman,” the nice little man glared at the other little man from the opposite shoulder.

“Hmph! Call me when you want some real advice, Dex. Softy over here ain’t gunna get you anywhere.” Thaddcus disappeared. Meanwhile, Crystal was trying to get Dexter to slow dance but he wouldn’t budge.

“How do I slow dance?” Dexter whispered to the little man.

“What? Did you say something”, Crystal asked.

“No I didn’t say anything”, Dexter said nervously.

“Don’t worry I’ll show you. Just listen to every word that I tell you”, the little man said. Even with the little man directing his every move, Dexter still managed to step on Crystal’s feet several times.

“Um sorry”, Dexter apologized constantly. Crystal only winced. Dexter was starting to get the hang of it as the song progressed.

“Okay move to the left…your other left. There. You’re doing great Dexter. Now here comes the hard part. I’m going to need you to hold a conversation and dance with her at the same time. Do you think you can do that?”

“Um it’s going to be tough. I don’t know what to say.”

“Uh….Try talking about how hot it is in the gym. That might lead to something.”

“Phew! Crystal, this gym is hotter than Sasuke’s fire style jutsu from Naruto don’t you think?”

“Um…yeah…sure?” Crystal said obviously confused. “Some people want it all! But I don’t want nothing at all! If it ain’t got you baby! If I ain’t got you baby! Don’t you just love this song? God I wish I had somebody like that, where nothing really mattered except for the love that I shared with that person. Instead, I just keep dating asshole after assholes who try to take advantage of me and everything.” Dexter was shocked; he never knew that Crystal felt so strongly about love or anything like that. He figured he should say something, but his mind was blank.

“Dexter she is giving you an opening. This is going to be risky, but it just may work. You need to say these words: Crystal, I can be that somebody for you. Here’s your chance!” The little man was ecstatic at the opportunity that presented itself. Dexter took a deep breath and looked Crystal dead in the eye, something that he had never done before.

“Crystal, I can be th-“

“Excuse me can I cut in?” Jason suddenly appeared beside the two. He was talking to Dexter but he was looking at Crystal. Crystal made subtle shakes with her head, pleading with her eyes for Dexter to say no, but Dexter thought she had a strange twitch so he didn’t get the sign.

“Yeah sure. Talk to you later Crystal.”
“Dexter, no!” the little man screamed in his ear but it was too late. Dexter slid his hands away from Crystal’s hour glass hips and stepped back. Jason wrapped his large forearm around the middle of Crystal’s back and pulled her closer. Crystal was trying to get Dexter’s attention, but Dexter had already made his way to the punch table.
“Dexter do you realize what you just did?” Remington asked urgently.
“You idiot!” Thaddcus said appearing on Dexter’s shoulder, this time on the same shoulder as the other man.
“Don’t call him an idiot.”
“I’m calling you an idiot, softy! That’s why you don’t ever listen to this guy, Dex. He’s just gunna get you stepped on. Now if it were up to me….I would have given the ol’ one-two combo to Jason myself.” The little man jabbed the air with his tiny fists.
“What did I do wrong?” Dexter asked.
“Okay no I’m calling you an idiot for not knowing what you did wrong.”
“Dexter….you let the girl you like dance with her ex-boyfriend that she probably still has feelings for.”
“Oh…shoot.” Dexter dropped his cup and punch spewed all over the floor. He just realized the gravity of his mistake.
“Oh shoot is right kid.”
“Can I get her back?” Dexter and the two little men glanced at Jason and Crystal. Jason held her close to him and he was whispering something in her ear. Whatever Jason was saying Crystal seemed to like it because she was laughing and smiling.

“We better hurry”, Remington said solemnly.

“I got a plan”, the two little men said in unison. They looked at each other skeptically.

“Your plan is what got us here in the first place!” Thaddcus accused.

“Well your plan almost made Dexter the laughing stock of the school!”

“Keyword: almost. Now everyone loves him thanks to me.”

“Uh guys?” Dexter didn’t know which little man he should listen too.

“My plan would have made Crystal fall in love with Dexter if it weren’t for-“

“Those meddling kids and that dumb dog.” The grouchy little man mimicked the other man’s voice but made it five octaves higher. “You know what I’m going to let you try your little plan first, so you won’t complain that you didn’t have a chance when my plan succeeds.”

Remington only rolled his eyes. “You are too kind”, he said sarcastically. “Dexter are you ready?...Dexter?” Dexter wasn’t listening to him because he was too busy watching Jason put his arm around Crystal. Crystal seemed to enjoy that because she placed her head gently on his chest. The two little men followed Dexter’s gaze.

“Damn they look like the picture perfect couple. Yeah you lost her Dex”, Thaddcus said pessimistically.

“It’s never too late for love”, the nice little man affirmed.

“Oh brother. Your cheesiness is actually making me nauseous. I’m about to hurl.” Thaddcus pretended to throw up. “Call me when it’s over Dex”, and with that he disappeared. Dexter sighed to himself. The two had stopped dancing, and now crystal was sitting close to Jason playing with his curly brown hair.

“Dexter focus.”

“Okay I’m listening.”

“All we have to do is separate Jason from Crystal. Then you remind Crystal how Jason hurt her and that she deserves better”

“Deserves a better what?” Dexter said absent mindedly; he still couldn’t believe that Crystal would leave him like that.

“A better boyfriend. Focus Dexter.” The little man snapped his fingers in front of Dexter’s eyes to make him listen. “Now I want you to walk over to Crystal and ask her to dance. Don’t look a Jason and don’t acknowledge him. Can you do that?”

“I don’t know…he’s kind of big. What if he tries to hurt me?” Dexter looked down at his thin scrawny arms and small torso. He wouldn’t last a second in a fight.

“Be brave Dexter. It’s all about confidence”, the little man smiled at him.
“You’re right.” He adjusted his glasses, pulled his pants up higher on his belly, fixed the wedgie in his butt, and held his chin high. Dexter pushed passed the people on the dance floor to get to the table where Jason and Crystal were sitting. Jason smirked at him as he realized that Dexter was coming their way.

“Dexter the karate kid! I would like to thank you for keeping my baby company while I was dancing”, Jason squeezed Crystal closer to him. “That was really thoughtful of you.”

“Don’t let him get to you.” Remington said. Dexter stopped right in front of Crystal and focused all of his attention on her, but she wouldn’t look at him. Crystal’s blonde hair cascaded down her shoulders and her head was cradled on Jason’s chest.

“Well you can go now.” Jason said, making a shoe-shoe motion with his hands.

“Crystal, do you want to dance?” Dexter’s voice cracked a little, but he said these words with an unusual firmness.

“Hold your hand out to her.” The little man said. Dexter extended his palm to the backside of Crystal’s hand. She didn’t make a motion to take it. Crystal lifted her head and her light blue eyes met his brown ones. Her entire face was wrecked with sadness and sorrow and she bit her lip.

“I-I’m sorry Dexter, but I’m with my boyfriend right now…maybe another time.” Crystal spoke quietly but her words echoed inside Dexter’s head. He froze.

“Oooooh tough luck karate kid, but as you see this lovely girl is mine for the rest of the night. So you can go. I hope this doesn’t alter our friendship.” Jason sneered. “Bye-bye now.” Dexter never felt so broken and betrayed. Dexter ran away from the couple like they were monsters. He dashed to an abandon corner of the gym and curled up in a little ball.

“Those bastards!” Remington cursed loudly.

“Damn that was pretty messed up”, Thaddcus said appearing on Dexter’s shoulder again. Dexter kept shaking his head in disbelief. “Um…hey…it’s gunna be alright kid.”

“Now I know what Goku felt like when Vegeta betrayed him in the fight against Broly…”

“What did I tell you about co-“, the little man was about to chide Dexter for making another comic book reference but stopped when he saw the cold look from Remington. “I mean…yeah I was thinking the same thing.”

“JASON! YOU LEFT ME FOR THIS B****? YOU TOLD ME YOU WERE DONE WITH HER!” Sarah’s sudden outburst could be from across the gym. Dexter swiveled his head to see Sarah flapping her hands at Jason.

“Sorry Sarah, but we’re done.” Jason said calmly without the faintest sign of remorse.

“So you’re just gunna give up everything that we had?? Baby I loved you!” Sarah was suddenly pleading. Tears smeared her mascara and blush, making her look like a sad clown.

“We only dated for a couple days, but thanks for everything.” Jason cooly flipped his hair and put his arm around Crystal who was sitting quietly beside him. At this point, everyone had stopped dancing and was now watching the argument. The DJ had even turned off the music and the chaperones were making their way over to the scene.

“Is everything okay here?” One of the chaperones asked.

“I’m gunna kill you, Jason!” Sarah jumped on Jason and tried to claw his face with her fake ruby red nails. It took four chaperones to pull her off of him and even that was barely enough. When they finally got Sarah off of him, Jason calmly stood up out of his chair and dusted himself off, wiping the long brown hairs off of his white tuxedo. He wasn’t mad or angry; in actuality, he looked devoid of any emotion.

“I gotta go to the bathroom. I’ll be back baby.” Jason jostled his way through the crowd and avoided the cold stares from his classmates as he proceeded to the bathroom.
“Asshole…”, was muttered disparagingly in the crowd, but no one had the guts to say it loud enough for Jason to hear. A few of Sarah’s friends lead her away to comfort her and everything slowly went back to normal. From across the room, Dexter noticed something peculiar about the whole argument. Crystal had wrapped her arms around her body throughout the whole altercation, but she hadn’t moved an inch. She hadn’t lifted a finger to defend Jason from Sarah, or yelled at Sarah for calling her a b****.

“There is something different about her…” Dexter said to himself.

“Who cares about her…did you see Jason! He dropped one girl and picked up another in a matter of seconds, and there wasn’t a bit of guilt on his face.” Thaddcus gawked.

“It’s despicable”, Remington said.

“It’s awesome!” Dexter and Remington stared at Thaddcus. “What?” He asked innocently. “I’m just saying…from man to man”

“More like teenager to embryo”, the nice little man retorted.

“What are you trying to say huh?” the mean little man raised his voice challenging him.

“I’m saying…you’re short.”

“What?!?” the mean little man exploded. “In my current state I clearly have a full millimeter over you and you know it! Don’t make me walk across Dexter’s big neck and teach you a lesson!” The mean little man snapped into a boxing stance. The other little man simply yawned pretending to be bored.

“I want her back”, Dexter said softly. The two little men immediately stopped.

“I think you lost her Dexter….” Remington said apprehensively. His little fingers patted him softly on the bottom of his head.

“You don’t understand. She was the only one that actually treated me like a person, even when we were little. Everyone else called me weird or made fun of me, but she always stood up for me. Yeah she doesn’t understand half of my jokes and yeah I’m not nearly as cool as some of her other frien-“

“Oh really? We hadn’t noticed…” Thaddcus rolled his eyes.

“Shhh! Let him continue”

“She’s just a really nice girl that’s all.”

“So you want her back? Well I can help.”

“Whoa, whoa whoa! You had your chance buddy. Now it’s my turn. With my advice Dex, you will never go wrong.”

“You will really help me again?” asked Dexter happily
“Of course. That’s what we’re paid….Um…I mean here for.” Thaddcus beamed at Dexter. “Now here’s what we’re going to do….”

“I would like to thank everyone for coming out and making this the best prom ever!” The DJ’s announcement over the microphone was responded with hundreds of shouts from everyone in the gym. “I would especially like to thank the parents and faculty for making this night possible and enjoyable. Okay we only have about two songs left then we are out of here. Let me see how the Crawfield High School get’s down! Go bears!” The DJ played the next song on his turntables and hundreds of students rushed to the dance floor. “Man I’m glad this night is almost over. This year’s prom was so lame.” Jason yawned and stretched his long legs. His arm was once again around Crystal and they were watching everyone dance. “Don’t you think?” “Yeah…” Crystal whispered softly. She looked distant and uncomfortable to be so close to him. “What’s wrong? Oh I get it…you’re thinking about after prom right?” Jason looked Crystal up and down like she was a piece of meat. He reached his hand out to caress her soft thighs but Crystal batted it away. She suddenly glared at him with her cold blue eyes. “Jason you are such an a-“ “Ugh not him again…Doesn’t he know when to quit?” Jason groaned. Crystal turned and saw Dexter striding their way. Dexter’s hands were clenched tightly and his usual awkwardness was replaced with an unnatural seriousness. “Crystal. You are coming with me now!” Dexter barked at Crystal. His voice was still squeaky but there was an added intimidation factor to it. “Look here macho man-“ Jason began scathingly. “Excuse me was I speaking to you? Thank you.” Dexter snapped at Jason. Jason was speechless; he certainly wasn’t expecting that response. Jason wasn’t expecting Dexter to remove his tuxedo jacket and fling it at his chest either. “Dexter…where is all of this coming from?” Crystal asked astonished. She had never seen him act so aggressively with anyone else before. Dexter responded by grabbing Crystal’s wrist forcefully. “Come. Now.” Dexter’s cutting words were almost enough to make Crystal follow him, but Jason suddenly came between the two. “Look here punk.” Jason threw Dexter’s jacket on the floor. “I don’t know where your coming from thinking that you can talk to me that way, but trust me I will gladly put you in your place.” Jason popped the knuckles in his fingers menacingly. He then grabbed Dexter’s collar and picked him up a few inches off the ground with one hand. They were eye level and their faces were almost touching. “Jason son, shi e no junbi!!” Unperturbed by Jason’s threat, Dexter managed to pull back his right fist then with all the force in his small arm he launched a punch that hit Jason squarely in the throat. Jason tripped and tumbled on top of the table behind him. In that split second, Everything stopped. The music, the students, the chaperones, Dexter, Crystal, everything and everyone were in a frozen state of disbelief and shock. “Owie!” Dexter suddenly broke the silence by screaming and clenching his right hand in pain. “Whoa did you see that? Dexter knocked him out!” Crawfield High School had been turned upside down. Dexter’s classmates hooted and hollered his name and patted his back saying things like “Good riddance” Or “It was about time someone taught him a lesson”. Chaperones rushed to the scene trying to push the crowd back, but they wouldn’t be moved away from their hero. “It hurts! Does anyone have a Band-Aid and some Neosporin?” “I’m gunna kill you!” Jason climbed to his feet with a murderous glare in his eyes. He was just about to rush Dexter but Crystal held her arms outstretched in front of him, blocking him from getting any closer. “Stop! I’ll handle this. Dexter…you need to go. Ple-Please leave us…” Crystal stuttered, but her words were clear enough to Dexter. “Boooooooo! How could you?” The crowd expressed their disapproval of Crystal’s decision. Dexter sighed and his shoulders dipped. He hung his head and turned away from Crystal and Jason, losing himself in the crowd. “Yeah that’s what I thought! You ain’t taken this from me! She’s mine!” Jason shouted at Dexter as he was departing. Jason attempted to wrap his hand around Crystal’s hips but Crystal side-stepped away. “Baby?” “No Don’t baby me, Jason.” Crystal crossed her arms and gathered her thoughts before speaking. “I’ve been waiting all night to get the guts to tell you this…Jason you are the biggest a-hole I have ever met in my entire life. You f*ing use me and all the other girls like we are no better than the toilet paper that wipes your fat ass. I’m done with you.” Crystal’s entire body shook with pent up rage, and it was all coming out like an open dam. She opened her hand and promptly slapped Jason as hard as she could. Jason’s face swiveled to the side and there was a large red imprint of a hand on his face. “Why you little bi-…gah!” As Jason was about to throw a blow of his own at Crystal, she had already countered the attack with a preemptive strike. The top of her shoe connected the place between Jason’s legs with a crunch. Jason rolled and spazzed on the floor clutching his private parts. The crowd exploded with elated emotion that the chaperones had no way of controlling. Fingers and cameras were pointed at Jason, as everyone laughed and celebrated, everyone except Dexter.

The cool night air rippled through Dexter’s brown hair and fogged his glasses. Dexter pensively looked out onto the parking lot, replaying those words over and over: Please leave us.

“You were an animal, Dex!” Thaddcus congragulated. “That’s the way to do it! You showed Jason who’s boss. Man that was truly amazing kid! See with my advice you’ll never go wrong.”

“Uh you didn’t tell him to do any of that.” Remington interjected. “You told him to grab Crystal and run while Jason was still in the bathroom…”

“Hey! The guy was taking a long dump and he is twice Dexter’s size. I didn’t want Dexter over here to miss out on this chance.” Thaddcus said defensively. “What Dexter did was basically my plan anyway.”

“Oh please…all you want is the credit. You don’t care about how he feels or what happens to him. As long as he follows your horrid advice you’re satisfied right?

“What are you trying to say!” The little man counted on his fingers and thought for a minute. “This is my great great great great great great great great great great nephew?....or is it grandson? It doesn’t matter. I love him more than you, and you’re just mad that your advice didn’t work.”

“Wha-What? How could you make such an accusation?”

“Stop fighting! Please. Thank you both for everything but…” Dexter rubbed his eyes and sniffled. He hadn’t broken his long trance with the parking lot. “It doesn’t matter. Crystal is gone.”

“It’s gunna be fine Dex. There are other fish in the sea. The girl in the pink was checking you out. Maybe you could try going after her.” Thaddcus playfully nudged Dexter on the neck.

“Just think of all of the fun you had tonight. You knocked out Jason, you danced for the first time, and you gained your classmates respect.” The other little man added. Dexter sighed and looked up to the sky.

“I think I want to be alone guys…” The little men only shrugged their shoulders before vanishing. Dexter wiped the fog off his glasses and cleaned them on his shirt.

“Dexter…is that you?” Dexter swiveled his head to see a blue blob coming his way, but judging by the voice he already knew that it was Crystal. Crystal moved timidly towards him, not knowing how close she should stand. “Listen. We need to talk.”

“Uh okay.”

“You want to put your glasses back on?”

“Uh okay.”

“Can you say anything other than ‘uh okay’?”

“Uh okay…I mean yeah. Yes. Yes I can say other things.” Dexter nervously corrected himself. His knees felt like jello and he was about to tip over.

“Here. I’ll just do the talking. First off, I wanna say sorry for putting you through that little fiasco. I was just so focused on getting back at Jason that I neglected your feelings, and that wasn’t fair of me at all. I just didn’t want you to get caught in the middle of everything. Can you forgive me?” Crystal bit her lip and crossed her legs in the most innocent way.



“Uh okay.” Dexter smiled broadly and showed off his brilliantly shinning braces.



“So what about you tiger, where did all of that come from?” Crystal waved her hands behind her.



“Oh well that wasn’t all that amazing.” Dexter said shyly. “All I did was ask myself a question.”



“What would that question be?” Dexter looked at his feet. He was embarrassed to admit this to anyone especially Crystal. He tried to think of ways to avoid answering the question, but he couldn’t. He took a deep breath before responding.



“Well I asked myself…what would Yusuke do? He’s kind of my role model and the ultimate BA of this universe AND the demon universe. So…yeah.”



“You mean Yusuke from Yu Yu Hakasho? Yeah he’s pretty cool.” Dexter’s head jerked up and he almost gave himself whiplash. He couldn’t believe it; Crystal actually understood one of his references.



“Yo-you know who Yusuke is? You watch Yu Yu Hakasho??” Images of Dexter and Crystal getting married and raising children in a Japanese dojo flooded his mind. He was in love.



“Well no. I have a twelve-year old brother who is in love with that stu-.” Then Dexter went for it. Throwing all caution and insecurities to the wind, Dexter puckered his lips and went for the kiss. Dexter was so wrapped up in the moment that he didn’t realize how far Crystal was from him, so his lips actually stumbled on Crystal’s neck instead of her lips. “Oh ok…I didn’t realize that talking about my little brother was an entiment moment.” Crystal laughed and lightly pushed Dexter’s head away from her neck. Dexter closed his eyes and he knew he crossed the line, and he should have never been so brash. While his eyes were close, he felt a strange soft bristle brush his lips momentarily. He opened his eyes to see Crystal kissing him gently on the lips. Only a fleeting ephemeral moment but it was equal to an eternity of bliss.

“That was my advice!”

“Shhhhh! don’t ruin the moment for him.” Dexter heard the two little men’s voices but they were nowhere to be seen.

“Up here, dimwit!” Dexter looked to the sky and spotted two stars shinning brightly down at him.

“Thanks you guys.”
“Who are you talking to and what are you looking at?” Crystal inquired.
“Oh it’s nothing…” Dexter said a little mysteriously. Crystal looked at him curiously but she didn’t comment.
“C’mon let’s have one more dance before the night ends.” She tugged at his collar jovially, smiling and winking at him.
“You go ahead. I’ll catch up with you later.” Dexter said. Crystal frowned but she didn’t argue. Dexter waited till she opened the gym doors and returned inside.

“First kiss.” Dexter made a slashing motion with his right hand in the night air. “Check!”



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