This is incredible writing! I am only on the very first bit now, but I will continue to read it! Thank you.

This is amazing, I haven't been on this site for a good while so I read your comment on my story very late and it led me here. But seriously, you're such a talented writer. I love what you wrote about and the way you put words together :)

I really like the concept of this story, you take the idea of afterlife and really put a new twist on it. I do agree with some of the points Donna suggested, but at the same time, it all comes down to your vision and how you prefer your readers to see it. I can tell you worked very hard on this, so be proud and keep writing! :)

This is a really great novel, and a very creative concept behind it. However, if you would like to have this published someday, I have some suggestions to improve it just a little. First of all, keep your voice consistent. I like that you have Emilia narrating. However, if this is the case then you are more restricted. Emilia can not possibly know other people's thoughts, or whether someone's hands are cold or hot. In order to keep the descriptive details (which are very good!) you need to either switch POV or else have a saying that mentions something like, "once I was dead, I could hear other people's thoughts, and feel what they were feeling" or something along those lines. Also, in the same token, you switch very quickly back and forth between Adam and April, seeming to follow both of them at the same time. If this is true, how is Emilia in both places at once? This needs to be explained for the readers to comprehend everything. One last suggestion, be sure to keep your characters consistent. Adam goes from being all depressed at his house to suddenly deciding to move away and acting all happy, and then goes back to being sullen. Other than those things, I really enjoyed the storyline. I kept reading on and on because I wanted to know what happened next. Keep writing!