I'm Fine | Teen Ink

I'm Fine

November 28, 2013
By Jasminniemouse6 BRONZE, London, Other
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Jasminniemouse6 BRONZE, London, Other
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Favorite Quote:
'Be yourself, because those who mind don't matter and those who matter don't mind'


Author's note: I’m Fine is probably my favourite story so far, because I can relate to it. I began writing it around a year ago, when I was going through a bit of rough time. I spent a large amount of time doing nothing but writing on my laptop, however, when I saw people and they asked me how I was, I would always answer with “I’m Fine”. I wasn’t fine. It struck me after a while that I use the phrase “I’m Fine” all the time to mask my true feelings,and I’m not the only person who does this. In fact, “I’m Fine” is a common phrase used by everybody to avoid talking about how they really feel. People end up bottling up their feelings inside and only becoming more upset inside. I needed something to cheer me up at the time. Everybody does at some point in their life. So if anybody has something going on that they’d rather say they’re fine about than express, I’d like them to be able to pick up this book, and realise that hey, they may be having problems, but Melanie has probably been through something similar or worse.

10 confessions;
1.
I am overly competitive
2.
I over think everything
3.
I tend to be a people pleaser, so if someone doesn’t like me I try to make them (unless the person is Kelly)
4.
Despite being ultra organised at school, I’m like a total slob at home
5.
People say that I’m smart, but what nobody realises is that I struggle to keep up in like every lesson
6.
There are so many mistakes that I’ve made that I can’t help but regret
7.
I actually want to do well in school (I am actually such a geek, I just keep it a secret)
8.
I have a tendency to make lists for everything (Hence the list here)
9.
There is only one person on this earth that can make me realise how small and fixable my problems are.
And my top confession:
10.
That person is my mum.
You read stories and watch movies of teenage girls who start the story with a big problem, you know, are teased by the popular kids, hardly anybody knows their name, etc. etc. but eventually get the most perfect boy in their school to be their boyfriend with the help of their best friend.
Don’t get me wrong, I love watching movies like that and reading books with that storyline, but I always end up feeling slightly depressed knowing the odds of my life ending up like that are zero.
That is why this is not one of those stories.
That and one other reason;
I have never had a best friend.
Don’t start feeling sorry for me or thinking I’m one of those “friendless freaks” because I’m not. From about the age of 5, I’ve always been in groups of friends, you know, there would be like 3 or 5 of us, and we would all be very close, but everybody would have their one best friend and it would never be me. I would always be the odd one out. There have been times of course, when I’ve gotten close to people and it’s been the 2 of us against the world, but somehow, that’s never worked.
Well I’m getting a bit sick of these teenage stories with the happy endings and I’m pretty sure that I’m not the only one who feels this way, so I thought I’d make whoever is reading this feel better about their own lives because mine never goes perfectly.
I’m not gonna bore you all of the details of how life went through the whole of junior school, because to be honest, I did a load of stupid things then that I look back at now and say “What was I thinking??” so I will move on to the present day;
I go to Lambston Secondary School; an independent school, only girls. In fact, I’ve been going to an independent girl’s school since I was four. Don’t label me as one of those snooty rich kids who lives in a mansion, owns 3 ponies and drinks from solid gold goblets or whatever, my parents work super hard to keep me in private school, I live in a semi-detached house and the closest thing I have to 3 ponies is a cat which we got for like the cheapest price ever because a friend’s cat gave birth.
I’ve never had a boyfriend (But then again, unlike most people, I don’t believe that you can have a “serious relationship” when you’re 13 going on 14 and to be fair, I’ve never been to a mixed school so I only know around 6 boys who aren’t related to me). Though I don’t like to admit it, I can be a big gossip and I am a huge control freak which makes me really respect my friends for putting up with me.
This brings me on to friends. I have basically had the same friends since I started secondary school with the odd one or two coming and going in the first couple of years of school, (you know how big a deal arguments are when you’re 11/12). At the moment we are a group of 4, there’s;
Macy - The down to Earth, super smart, constantly caring, gorgeous brunette with the cute past-the-shoulder layered look and olive, Italian skin. She works extremely hard to keep up her grade “A” average. She’s the all rounder - as good at sports as she is academically (Though I reckon that she is slightly better academically).
Brooke - The slightly crazy, fun to be around, naturally smart without even having to try fare-skinned artist, with the dark, glossy straight hair in a cute shoulder length cut. She has the oddest fashion sense but it works for her. She also has an “A” average.
Kelly - The sporty, curvy, cute, girly blonde, with the naturally wavy hair and addiction to foundation and fake tan.
And then there’s me, Melanie Dansworth, the cocoa skinned anti-sport, control freak with the frizzy midlength black hair, the addiction to straighteners and the fringe that attempts to hide the fact that my forehead is roughly the size of Europe.
You’d think with an even number, we’d each have one best friend, but no. You see, as much as I love them, Macy and Brooke have been best friends since... I don’t know, like birth or something, and they went to a different junior school to me, and though they say we’re all best friends, it’s obvious that it’s always gonna be the 2 of them, I mean, Kelly’s tried to weasel her way in a few times, you know, by trying to tear the 2 of them apart and trying to make Brooke her best friend, but no matter how hard it gets for them, eventually they come to their senses and are as strong as ever.
And Kelly? Well, she’s a lot like me, in terms of never having a proper best friend, and we tried the best friend thing, back in the first year of secondary school when we were both 11, but she stays with someone for a while, gets bored and moves on, and ever since I confronted her about it in the end of that first year she’s disliked me. To be honest, I have watched her break tons of friendships apart in the last couple of years and personally just find her really desperate now, the only reason I’m friends with her now is because she’s friends with Macy and Brooke and I love hanging out with them.
I should really listen to what’s going on. It’s the first day of year nine and I’m sitting outside eating lunch and ignoring what Kelly is saying. It’s a typical British September; the sun is trying as hard as it can to peer through the clouds yet not succeeding, harsh winds are wrapping around the trees, blowing the litter off of the streets near our school, and yet everybody (Including me) has traded the winter tights for the summer socks.
It’s the first day back at school from the summer holidays, so we’re sitting shivering outside eating in our usual spot (The corner in the field hidden away from everyone where the bushes and the long jump pit meet) watching the new Year 7’s show up with the longest skirts ever (The school says that skirts should be halfway between the knee and the ankle, but everybody but the year sevens wear them like an inch or so above the knee).
Kelly’s got too much fake tan on - and she’s wearing an excessive amount of foundation too. Again, as usual she is bragging about all the fun holiday time she spent with Macy and Brooke that she didn’t bother inviting me to;
“Oh my god! Yeah so wasn’t it so funny when my mum pulled that face and bla de bla de bla and I was so embarrassed and then bla de bla de bla and then you guys laughed and then bla de bla de bla and then we saw that movie and then bla de bla de...” Well, you get the jist.
She’s going on and on and on about everything that she invited them to and I’m sitting there in silence because, well, I have that slight pang of jealousy and, you know, what else was I supposed to do? Macy is looking up at me from her yoghurt with a confused look on her face;
“Hey Melanie, you okay? You haven’t said much.”
No I’m not okay. Why would I be okay? My 3 “Best friends” have sat there and talked for 30 minutes straight about everything that Kelly didn’t invite me too and I have had to sit there like a lemon because I really don’t know what to say.
“I’m fine! Don’t worry!” I’m smiling my most convincing smile but both Brooke and Macy are shooting me a sceptical look.
One of the things I love about them is that after I say that I’m fine they know that it’s code for them to leave the subject alone, and yet they both knew that I wasn’t fine. Kelly on the other hand, has taken my advice and is not worrying, so the focus is back on her again.
I honestly think that every time Kelly opens her mouth I hate her a little bit more. She thinks so much of herself that it’s unreal. I mean, it took about 5 minutes before Macy and Brooke zoned out too. Macy reached inside her lunch-bag for her phone and now she’s texting, Brooke’s keeping herself entertained with the piece of cellophane that her sandwich had been wrapped in and I’m eating my sandwich and laughing internally. It’s actually hilarious that she hasn’t noticed that nobody is listening to her. I kinda feel sorry for her. Maybe I should listen,
“I can’t believe we have netball right after lunch! It’s so much effort! I get so tired of Miss Swanrine telling me that I should be on the school netball team! I mean after a while you wish that you know, you weren’t as good at sports as you are! Melanie, Brooke, you don’t know how lucky you are that you don’t have her constantly asking you to play for the team! I mean even you don’t understand Mace! You’re on the team by choice! Speaking of netball we need partners so Brooke, I’m yours.”
“What?” See now Brooke’s glanced up from her piece of cellophane, “Um, sorry what did you ask?”
Kelly’s doing her classic eye roll and letting out an exasperated sigh, “Netball. Partner. You are mine.”
Whoa - for a moment, Brooke looked slightly uncomfortable there, I’m not sure if she wants to be Kelly’s partner after all. That would be a first.
“Oh, right, sorry I’m Macy’s.” Brooke mumbled quickly, and now she’s gone back to what she was doing without another word.
And so the awkward silence has begun. You see, Kelly always gets her way - she is never turned down for anything. Plus, no one would ever say anything but we all know that Kelly would never ask me to be her partner because she doesn’t like me, or think of me as a friend. She went quiet for a moment then pursed her lips and shrugged,
“That’s fine; I’ll go ask Megan or someone. See you later!” And now, she has got up, strutted over to the bin, emptied the whole, un-eaten contents of her lunch bag away and made her way to the closest door into the school.
“God Kel! Un-roll your skirt at least once!” Macy has joked after her,
So obviously, Kelly had to turn around and be all like “My skirt’s fine!”
Which it really isn’t, it just about covers her butt and her pants are totally on show, she’s so in denial about it, I have to say something;
“Kelly, I can see your luminous spotty knickers.”
Okay, maybe I shouldn’t have been that upfront about it. Although, Brooke and Macy have both erupted into a fit of giggles. They totally agree - Kelly’s knickers actually are showing. Kelly doesn’t look too pleased though; she’s just rolled her eyes and tried to divert the embarrassment away from her.
“God Melanie! Why are you looking, you perv?!” she screamed across the field, before actually unrolling her skirt once around the waist.
Typical Kelly, she’ll listen to me, but she’ll act like she’s come to the decision on her own. Now that she’s gone, the conversation can hopefully become interesting.
“You don’t really have to try to look; they’re just there when she gets up!” Brooke’s agreeing, “By the way, what were you doing in the summer, Melanie? I barely got to see you!”
And now I wish that I had something interesting to say, but the truth is, I spent the majority of my summer babysitting my little brother, Max. So I’ll tell them about the few interesting things I did do and just ask them how their holidays were, (Macy goes to Italy every year and Brooke’s parents surprised her with a 3 week trip to New York).
You know what? I actually love these 2. I’ve known them for 2 years now and I already feel like I’ve known them forever. Who knows? Year nine might not be as bad as I thought.

10 annoying things about Lambston Secondary School;
1.
In order to get to school on time, I have to get up and 6:30am
2.
It is very rare to go a week without having any tests
3.
It specialises in sport and I’m not sporty
4.
They stuck me in the top maths group due to my exam result and now I feel really dumb because everybody else is actually smart and I’m always like a page behind everyone,
5.
The uniform is really sucky,
6.
School dinners are terrible (But I have packed lunches so it’s not that bad),
7.
There is terrible mobile signal in every classroom
8.
There is terrible mobile signal out in the school grounds too
9.
You get in trouble if you’re caught eating in the classroom, and in the winter, (when you freeze if you eat outside) there’s not enough space for everyone to sit in the cafeteria
And the most annoying thing about my school:
10.
It takes me almost 2 hours to get home from school in the afternoon.
It’s amazing. There is one bus that goes from Lambston to anywhere remotely near my house. ONE BUS! And it doesn’t even start near my school! You see, Lambston High is in the middle of nowhere, so I have to walk a ten minute walk up a hill from school, past the railway station, and turn on to another road in the middle of nowhere that has a bus stop.
From there I have to usually wait roughly 20 minutes if I miss the first bus (School ends at 3:30 and there’s one bus at 3:38 that I can sometimes get if I sprint and teachers let us out on time) and then that bus takes me 10 minutes to get to a stop on Lambston high street, where I then have to wait 5-10 minutes for a bus that takes 50 minutes to get to the ‘Herbal Goods Store’ at the end of my road.
What makes it worse is the fact that my school is only a 20 minute drive away from my home, but it’s really tricky to get to the second bus stop and the bus takes a route that goes around every possible road that it can.
Well, I’ve just arrived home, it’s 5:20pm, and I am already tired from lugging around a tonne of books that need to be covered for the next time I have those lessons. I did the easiest thing I could do; drop my bag at the door, follow Socks (my cat) into the kitchen, fill her water and food bowl, decide to leave the litter box for my dad to empty, grab an apple from the fridge, my bag from the hallway and make my way upstairs to my room.
I love my room, it got re-done last year. You see, the teddy bears that I had painted on my walls weren’t cutting it anymore so my parents said that if I could come up with the money, then I could re-do it. There are like no jobs available for girls my age, so I ended up saving up birthday money and Christmas money for 2 years, and now I have replaced the whole teddy bear theme with four pale lilac walls, deep purple curtains, and a white bed with a bedspread that matches the curtains. Inside is a white wardrobe, with a matching chest of drawers, a desk and like 3 mirrors (Not because I’m vain - because they came in a pack of 3 - full length, mid length and small and I wanted to make the room look bigger because it’s tiny).
You know what? I’m staring at my reflection in this full length mirror and I didn’t realise how terrible I actually looked at school. Lambston Secondary School has the worst uniform ever - I don’t understand why anybody in their right mind would pair a pale green shirt with a plaid, pleated navy monstrosity of a skirt. Not to mention the super ugly jumper (bright green with a black stripe on the collar) that just has to be the most hideous thing I have ever had to wear in my life.
I need to do something..... My brush is in the same place - resting on my bed because I chucked it there this morning. All I have to do is take my hair out of its slightly frayed ponytail, un-clip my fringe (Ever since Kelly went to the hairdressers and got a similar styled one, I haven’t worn it out to school) brush my hair out, shower, wash my hair, pull on my favourite pyjamas (They’re blue with snowmen on) and grab my blow-dryer from the bag in the corner of my room.
I know that it sounds kinda complicated but it’s pretty simple when you’ve done it a couple of times and I’m a big perfectionist so I LIVE by routines.
Oh great. The phones ringing. The only working home phone we’ve got is the one attached to the wall in the front-room, and it’s so much effort running down to the front room every time someone rings the house. I better answer it then,
“Hello?”
“Where were you?!” My mum practically screams down the phone, “I rang your mobile 9 times!”
I’m gonna write this in a dialogue because it’s easier;
Me: I was in the shower, I couldn’t hear anything.
Mum: Watch the attitude missy.
Me: Sorry, what did you want?
Mum: I wanted to see how your first day back went but you didn’t pick up your mobile and you weren’t picking up the home phone and I began worry!
Me: Oh, yeah it was okay, I had an overall good day, can I talk to you when you get home?
Mum: ...What are you doing?
Me: Nothing, just talking to you why?
Mum: Then why are you so desperate to get off of the phone?
Me: Because I just washed my hair and there is water dripping down my back.
Mum: You need to dry that off! You could catch a cold!
Me: I know that is what I was going to do, but then you rang.
Mum: Oh, well then I’ll talk to you when I get home, bye,
Me: Bye.
See, that is a typical conversation with my mum - whenever I don’t pick up my phone she assumes the worst. It’s annoying, but at the same time, it’s great to know how much she cares about me. You know, I should probably check my mobile, I mean my mum did say that she rang me 9 times.
Well, there they are; the 9 missed calls, along with 2 text messages.
The first from my dad; hey, how was your first day back? Did you get home alright?
Which I decided to reply with; Yh, I’m fine, I’m home, first day was Gd How r u??
And the second from Kelly; Hey, u alrite? I tlkd 2 Megan in netball & she sed tht Becki heard Brooke & Macy say tht u were upset with someone?? Who r u upset with?? I won’t tell any1 Xxxxx
Huh. Typical. The only time Kelly ever texts me is when she thinks that there’s drama going on, so she can be the first one to know. I’m not going to bother replying to her, I’ll just delete the text message and chuck my phone back on my bed where I had left it earlier.
Aww, Socks just tiptoed in, stretched on the end of my bed, and let out a small “Meow”. I sat next to her and stroked her tummy with one hand while I dried my hair with the other, it’s taken six months, but she’s finally gotten over her fear of the sound my blow-dryer makes. I felt my hand shift slightly as she climbed onto my lap and began purring. At least she was, but the front door clicked open and my dad came in. She practically leapt off of my lap and now she’s sprinting to the door.
“You’re always here when I get home, aren’t you? At least SOMEONE met me at the door!”
He’s joking. He’s not mean or possessive or anything, it’s just that Socks worships the ground that he walks on so we’ve got used to her meeting him at the door. I probably should go downstairs and say hi though,
“Hi Dad! How was work?”
“Alright, nothing special, I’ve got ten minutes to relax before I have to go and pick up your brother from his football practise. So, you heard from your mum today?”
And now we’re both sitting in front of the TV watching the sports updates (well, he’s watching, I don’t really get sports so I’m just trying to figure out what’s going on. We do this every day when he comes home from work during school time.
Phone is ringing again. This time it’s mum;
“Hey, just got off the train, the bus home takes 5 minutes; will you put kettle on and take the instant coffee out of the cupboard? Okay, see you in a minute bye.”
And she’s already hung up, better get started then. Okay, I’ve filled it with water, now the kettles boiling, just need to find a box of instant coffee in the cupboard. Honestly, you cannot find anything in this cupboard, plus half of these boxes are out of date anyway. Let’s see, we have tinned tomatoes, tuna, corned beef, jerk seasoning, jam... ahhh, there’s the instant coffee - nestled between a tin of tomato soup and an ancient “Noodles - Just Add Water” packet. Oh, and behind them are some De-Caf Cappuccino sachets. I feel like some De-Caf Coffee! Oh, but it’s an old sachet - and there’s no expiration date - just some faded squiggly lines. Oh well, it’s probably good.
Now my mum’s home and I am already halfway through my cup of what vaguely tastes like a Cappuccino.
“I’m home! What are you drinking? Is that coffee because you know that I don’t like you drinking so much caffeine!”
“Relax! It’s De-Caf.”
Great, she’s grabbed my mug and she’s looking at the suspicious looking liquid inside, she’s gonna realise that it doesn’t even look like coffee. She’s gonna make me throw it away. It doesn’t taste good or anything, I just wanted something warm to drink and I don’t particularly want to throw it away. Okay, she’s gonna say something, just gotta get ready to fight back and lie,
“I didn’t even know that we had De-Caf coffee left in the house. Did you check the expiration date?”
And now she’s giving me that look. That evil, ‘I know way better than you so I’m gonna tell you what to do now and your just gonna do it look.
“Of course I checked the expiration date” That sounded relatively believable, I mean, it was the truth... kinda... I mean, I did check the expiration date; I just don’t have to tell her that I couldn’t make out what it said. Just need to change the subject, turn the conversation into something else, “So how was work?”
“Fine. How was school?”
Perfect. Now all I have to do is keep the conversation on school until I’ve finished my coffee and then I can go upstairs.
“I’m telling you, I didn’t punch the guy, my tackle just went wrong!!” Max just yelled. Great, now he’s coming into the kitchen without taking his trainers off, leaving a mud trail behind him. Mum’s about to explode.
“You better clean that up!!”
So now they’re in full blown argument mode and I’m back watching sports updates with my dad. As much as I love football... Okay I don’t like football at all. So I’m gonna go upstairs to my room, do some social networking.
Okay, so I got my own laptop for my 12th birthday so that I could do all my homework on my computer and I keep it underneath my bed because my bed is the only place I use it (I actually hate sitting at my desk). Max is 10 and he is counting down the days until he starts secondary school and can get his own laptop, because right now he is so jealous of the fact that I have one.
Let’s see... What to do, what to do... I guess I’ll go online, see what my friends have been up to. I love having my own room. I love the privacy, the peace, the serenity, the calmness...
“I need your laptop! Dad’s on the one downstairs and I have homework due in for tomorrow”
I need to get a lock on my bedroom door. URGH what is Max’s problem? Does he not understand that when my door is closed, he needs to at least knock! And now he’s walked up to my desk and is fiddling with my biology folder. He’s so annoying!
“Um, firstly can you not see me using it? Secondly, don’t touch that, and thirdly, next time, instead of telling me you need it, why don’t you actually...”
“I don’t need you laptop that much; I’ll go ask dad for the family one.”
“Urgh you’re such a pig!”
“Takes one to know one!”
“That insult sucked!!” I yelled as he was leaving my room, “And next time, close my door! It was closed for a reason! I need my privacy!”
Sometimes I hate my brother so much. I wonder why he’s even born most of the time.

The 10 steps to my morning routine
1.
Wake up at 5:45
2.
Continue to press snooze until 6:20
3.
Beat Max to the bathroom to use the toilet
4.
Go downstairs and eat a bowl of cereal
5.
Brush teeth and mouthwash
6.
Wash face
7.
Moisturise face
8.
Get dressed
9.
Do hair
And the 10th step to my morning routine:
10.
Sit downstairs ready with my shoes and my bag watching TV while mum yells at Max for not being ready
So Kelly rang me last night. It was... well, funny more than anything else. It’s amazing how fake somebody can be on the phone, and I mean store-bought pancake fake. It went a little something like this:
Me: ...Hey
Kelly: Um is this Melanie?
Me: Yeah. Is this Kelly?
Kelly: Yeah. Hi Melanie! I wasn’t sure if I had your right number,
Me: Well you do, this is me,
Kelly: Oh. I sent you a text earlier but I never got a reply?
Me: You did? That’s so weird I never got a text from you. (Which was a complete and total lie, I just didn’t want to reply to her)
Kelly: Oh. Well it said that it sent. Anyway, I was talking to Megan in netball and she said that when she was in the changing rooms before netball she heard Macy and Brooke say something about you being upset with someone?? Well, I thought that we were really good friends so I wanted you to know that you can tell me anything, I’ll always be here for you. So what’s wrong?
Me: Really!? If we are really good friends then why did you not talk to me once in the whole of the summer holidays? You only want to be my friend right now because you think I have something interesting going on and you want to be one of the first ones to know! Nice try but I’m not telling you anything!
Well I didn’t really say that. That was what I meant when I really said;
Me: I’m fine, really nothing’s wrong. So how are you?
Kelly: I’m good, look, I have to go. Bye.
So now I’m interested to see how school goes today and whether Kelly will acknowledge me at all. Kelly and I used to be really good friends, some would say best friends. But people change, sometimes for the better, sometimes for the worse and one of us changed and we grew apart. It’s just how it is. Honestly, I think it started when she got her first period halfway through year 7. Suddenly, she had this snooty thing about her and insisted on spending more time with Megan who ‘knew what she was going through’
However, in about the middle of year 8, they had this whole argument because Kelly became obsessed with Megan and added all Megan’s primary school friends on social networks like she knew them, and talking about them like she had actually met them.
As usual, as soon as Kelly came back, Brooke and Macy leapt to Kelly’s side like she hadn’t ditched them for ages and all of the bitchy remarks that they had made about her over the past couple of months were instantly erased. What did I do? Nothing. Lulled in the background because I wasn’t surprised, some of my friends are major begs.
Finally, I’m at school. That car journey was too long. I need school to hurry up, or at least the next half hour - I’m freezing. We have registration at 8:30, but Macy and I both get in at 7:50ish, (Me because my mum drops me to school before she drops Max. Macy because she takes the train and the early train is the only one that can get her to school on time).
If you get in early, you’re supposed to report to the school hall until 8:25 but it’s really crowded and loud in there and the floor is always sticky so Macy and I meet on the stone steps outside of the cubicle of sports lockers.
So here we are as usual, casually sitting on the stone steps chatting about random little subjects. I like Macy, she’s very down to earth, and unlike most people at my school, she’s in a similar situation to me. She lives in the same kinda sized house as me, has 2 working parents, can barely afford private school and buys any designer clothes that she has in sales.
It’s only the second day at school so obviously, we’re still in September, but it’s a really cold September this year, I mean we’ve been outside for 20 minutes now and my butt is freezing, plus I’m holding onto my coat for dear life. It’s one of those days where you breathe and mist comes out of your mouth and Macy’s rubbing her hands together in hope that they’ll warm up.
“Hey, Melanie?”
“Yeah?”
“It’s freezing out here.”
“I know.”
“Wanna go inside?”
“I don’t mind, but I hate that lunch hall.”
“Me too.” Now Macy’s tapping her foot. It’s what she does when she’s trying to think of a solution and has nothing to say, “Wanna go to our form room?”
There’s her solution.
“Sure.”
You’re not supposed to be allowed in your classrooms until 8:25, in fact, you’re not supposed to be allowed anywhere outside of the hall until 8:25, but we like to take the risk and go to our classroom at around 8:10. Teachers are supposed to roam up and down the corridors, sending people to the hall, but whenever Macy and I sneak in early we hardly ever see teachers.
Its pitch black - obviously no one else is here. I hate our form room. Most of the school has been redone in the past few years, but we have to be on one of the only corridors that has not been touched. It’s a dingy old history classroom with faded cake, biscuit and gum stains on the floor, threadbare worn carpets, some grey cracked paper on the walls that I swear was once white, and desks arranged with a middle rectangle of about 8 desks positioned in front of the teachers desk, and the rest of the desks going around the edge of the room, like a border. It’s an attempt to ‘create a creative learning atmosphere’. It doesn’t work. At all. Macy’s eyes are scanning the room as well, but I don’t think she’s taking in the dreary atmosphere.
“Something’s wrong...” Now she’s standing in the middle of the room circling slowly,
Oh well. If you can’t beat her, may as well join her. We’re both circling the room now, her probably with reason, me because... well... I don’t know why. Well, now I realise why. The giggles coming from underneath one of the middle tables explains it all. Now Macy and I are staring at each other, that cheeky/excited glint in our eyes. Dead silently, she’s placed her bag down on her desk, glanced quickly around the room, directed her focus back to me and mouthing the words.
“Three, two, one”
And we’re off: running around either side of the table and jumping underneath, scaring Becki and Allison as we do.
“What are you doing underneath here?” Macy’s managed to splutter between giggles.
We’re kinda friends with Becki and Allison. They have their own group of friends that consists of them, Megan and sometimes Chelsea and Britney from another form, but Macy, Brooke and I only really like Becki and Allison (because Megan is pretty stuck up, Chelsea only talks to you if she decides you’re popular and Britney only talks to you if Chelsea talks to you).
They’re both really pretty, both brunettes, but they have really different looks. Becki has the really light, thin just-passing-the-shoulder brown hair with natural blonde highlights whereas Allison has the long, thick, curly dark brown hair, both roughly the same height (Around 5’5) but Allison has really fair skin that burns easily and Becki has really tan skin.
“Well, we thought that you guys were teachers so we switched off the light and hid underneath the table” Allison’s finally explained, “And then we realised that this is actually a great place to hide so we thought that we would stay here until 8:25”
Macy and I are either side of the pair squashing them in the middle and we’ve all agreed that this is a pretty good hiding place, so now we’re staying underneath the table talking about the boring lessons that we have later, and annoying brothers, (Allison’s brother Kyle and my brother Max are in the same class at school).
Door just opened. Oh great. It’s all over, we’ve been caught. Busted. We’ll be sent back to the lunch hall to sit on worn down stools and get our shoes stuck to the floor. And whoever it is, is gonna give us that “You thought you could outsmart me - ha I’m better than you” look. Here it comes...
“Melanie!! Come and give me a hug!!” A shrill voice just screamed
Ok, maybe we aren’t busted.
It’s Kelly. I need to handle this tactically – slowly get out from underneath the table, and walk cautiously towards her wide spread arms. Wow. She’s actually hugging me, like properly squeezing me. This is really awkward. She smells like a Barbie doll and her hair is scratching my face.
“You and I really need to have a good talk.” Ok, and now she’s whispered to me, and her breath smells of tropical chewing gum and desperation.
This is such typical Kelly behaviour – acting like we’re besties because she wants to find out who I’m upset with. Oh well, when in Rome...
“Yeah, sure we can talk later.”
“Hey, what are you guys talking about?” Thank goodness Macy just broke the awkwardness between Kelly and me.
“Nothing. Don’t worry!” she’s replied with a shrug of her shoulders before turning around, mouthing “later” to me, and walking away.
Poor Macy. She’s looking over back at me for an answer. She honestly can’t stand being left out of things, but I guess none of us can to be honest. Time for some reassurance.
“Seriously don’t worry, Kelly’s just being Kelly! She’s fine she just asked me if I wanted to talk.”
The classroom’s already full of people buzzing and talking. It’s funny, as soon as 8:25 hits the school is filled with gossiping girls in plaid skirts and bright green shirts walking about everywhere. Kelly’s already off somewhere with Megan so Macy and I thought that the best idea would be to search the halls for Brooke.
Brooke is not a morning person at all, but she told Macy that she was coming in earlier than usual to finish off some homework. Classic Brooke, second day back and she was already behind on her homework. Macy and I find her where she usually tends to be in the mornings, on one of the library computers trying to get her homework for first period finished.
It’s not anything big, it is only the second day back at school after all. We had English yesterday and we had to fill out this sheet on the computer titled “Who am I?” and hand it in today. It had the basic questions; Name, age, favourite colour, what do you want to be when you grow up, your goals for the year, a paragraph on your personality, and if you were an animal what would you be.
Macy and I arrived at a good time; Brooke’s collecting something from the printer in the corner.
“You finished?” I asked as we went over to meet her
“Just. Hey!” she yelled, just before chasing after Macy, who had snatched her English homework, and is now giving it a read.
Wow. I need to rethink my English homework. This is a typical Brooke, a rushed but yet very impressive piece of work. I swear, Brooke could get away with anything. She doesn’t revise for tests and yet she gets super high test results, she doesn’t listen in class and yet gets amazing report cards and she does her homework at school in the mornings and yet it’s always amazing quality. That is probably the one thing Macy can’t stand about Brooke. Macy works super hard to get good grades and her grades are great, but they are always a couple of marks behind Brooke’s.
“My favourite colour is light blue because when translated to French it reads ‘bleu Clair’ and that is how I feel about my personality, clear - easy to see through - no secrets.” Macy read from Brooke’s sheet, “Brooke! What? Where did this come from? It asked you about your favourite colour, not a full insight into the poetic world of Brooke!”
“It’s all a load of rubbish that I typed in like 5 minutes” Brooke shrugged, stealing her sheet back, “I just needed something to hand in for next period”
Macy’s facial expression. Oh dear. This is actually quite funny, Brooke is completely oblivious to how jealous Macy is of her last minute luck. It’s been like this for as long as I can remember and to be honest, I completely understand where Macy is coming from, Brooke kind of flaunts the fact that she doesn’t revise and gets good grades after every single test we do, and it gets to the point where you just wanna go “Ok. We get it. You don’t revise.”
“Guys, hate to be a downer, but we have 2 minutes ‘til registration.” Macy’s staring at her watch in worry. She’s trying to get perfect attendance with no late marks.
Luckily, we done it.
Our form teacher, Mrs Baldon was already there when we got in, and so was every other girl in our class, sitting at their desks talking. She looked up and gave us a stern look,
“Don’t start off this year the way the three of you started off last year!” She moaned as we ran to our seats, “This is your third year of school here and this year I won’t let you off easy! I’ll mark you in as absent if you’re not here to answer your name!”
We sat down and tried to keep serious expressions on our faces, but as soon as she looked away we burst out laughing. We all got to choose where to sit in our form room yesterday. We immediately took the row of 4 at the back, I’m on the end (As usual) next to Macy, who’s next to Brooke and Kelly’s on the other end. Kelly leaned down on her desk so that she could see all of us (The problem with sitting at the end).
“Where were you guys?” She whispered down the line,
“You can talk! We asked you if you wanted to come with us! You were too busy with Megan” Macy whispered back
“Well sorry, but while you guys were messing about in the library, I was getting all of us invited to Chelsea’s birthday party!” She replied. At the mention of Chelsea’s name, Brooke chimed back into the conversation;
“Chelsea? Chelsea Billam?” Brooke asked,
You see, Chelsea Billam is in one of the other year nine classes, (There are 4 in total) and every year her parents pay for her to throw the most legendary birthday party ever. She rents out a club, gets a DJ and a live band, has a food room filled with sweets and hires a professional photographer to take pictures of everyone then posts them on her very own party website. The only problem is, the guest list is very exclusive, so unless you rank in the top 10 most popular year nine girls out of the 120 year nine girls that there are, you can’t expect an invite. 400 people go but the rest of them are year 10’s, year 11’s, girls that don’t go to our school and roughly 250 of them are boys.
“Yes, Chelsea Billam! Who do you think I mean?” She asked as she rolled her eyes, “It’s on the 31st October so the theme is Halloween! You’ve got to go in costume!”
Macy was still sceptical, “But..... How did we get invited?”
“I went with Megan to get her invite, and then Megan told Chelsea that she needed some for her friends so Chelsea gave Megan a bunch of invitations and there were spares! You’re welcome!” Kelly smiled, “Here you go, 1, 2, 3, 4” she counted as she handed us the invites
“Oh. My. God. What am I going to wear?” Brooke laughed,
“You should so wear that cute red halter neck that you bought when you, Macy and I went shopping that time!” Kelly exclaimed,
And then the conversation went, as it usually does, on to something that they did that I wasn’t invited too.

10 Costume Ideas that I could go to Chelsea’s party in;
1.
I could do what all the popular people do: dress like a slut and put on some form of animal ears and claim to be an animal,
2.
The obvious one - go in a short white dress, white heels, fling on some wings and go as an angel,
3.
I could go as a school girl - you know, tight short skirt, school shirt and tie - but that’s also been done to death.
4.
Go as some type of Disney character for a laugh, but I’m not popular so no one would find it funny.
5.
I’d say cheerleader, but those costumes are always super expensive,
6.
Maybe soldier - shorts, camouflaged top, trainers and military face paint,
7.
I would say 118 dude - you know, red shorts, white top with the words “118” sprawled across the middle, but then I’d have to do it with someone or I would look like a saddo, and if I did it with someone then I would have to wear the same as them, and that’s just awkward because you know that everyone will be talking about who looks better.
8.
I could do the easy thing - go in a nice dress, throw on a plastic tiara and tell everyone that I’m a princess
9.
I could go as a witch but I’m not a big fan of the warts and spots and broomsticks
And my 10th costume idea:
10.
I could just not go - because I don’t know if I can be bothered to find a costume
You know, when I imagined being a teenager, I imagined what my friends would be like. I imagined having that perfect best friend; the one that I told all of my secrets to, the one that I swapped clothes with, started a band with, and became famous with. It would be me and her against the world and whenever she came to my house we’d never be able to stop talking.
Somebody should have warned me how much reality would suck.
It’s been a week since we got our invites, so we’re lying on my bedroom floor brainstorming costume ideas. It’s the usual set up, no one’s really talking. I’m sitting crossed legged on the floor looking up Halloween costume ideas on the internet, Macy’s lying on the floor next to me stroking Socks, Brooke is lying on my bed daydreaming and Kelly is sitting on my swivel chair texting. It’s funny, for ‘best friends’ we never really talk that much.
“Maybe I could go as Minnie Mouse!” Brooke’s suggesting, breaking the awkward silence, “I’m serious, think about it, I could text Becki and ask if I could wear that cute short black spotty skater skirt that she wore to Stacie’s end of summer party, because she can’t wear it to two parties in a row and I could pair it with my red halter neck top that I bought last month, and buy a Minnie Mouse headband online!”
Ok, she’s right. That actually sounds kind of cute.
“And you could pair it with my bright red wedges!” Macy’s suggested, popping a bubble from the bubble gum in her mouth, “Kel, you okay? You haven’t told us any ideas.”
See, neither have I, but this is what happens. People care about Kelly more than they’ve ever cared about me. And it’s not like Kelly even cares – she’s rolling her eyes like it’s a chore to actually talk to us.
“Yeah, sorry, been texting Megan about the party.”
“Anything interesting?”
“Well actually, Chelsea’s chosen her 5 V.I.P’s. This year it’s Liz Witts her best friend out of school, Ariana and Lucy, her best friends in school, Megan and… Me! So it looks like you guys can’t come and get ready at mine before the party, sorry.”
And now she’s back to her phone. Like it doesn’t even matter that she’s just blown us off.
Oh yeah - another interesting thing about Chelsea’s party - the V.I.P. Section. Every year she chooses 5 girls and 5 boys who get ready at her house. The girls get their hair and make-up done by professionals, and get outfits bought for them. They’re literally like bridesmaids. When Chelsea makes her big entrance they follow behind her, each one escorted by a boy. Megan is always a V.I.P. But Chelsea has hardly ever spoken to Kelly and as far as Kelly talking to Chelsea, well; I’ve never seen it happen.
It probably makes me a bad person if I say this, but I’m kind of glad that she’s blown us off. This way I spend less time with her, and hopefully Macy and Brooke will finally pick me over her. It looks like it’s happening though, because Brooke and Macy are exchanging puzzled looks.
“Okay, then what are you going as?” Macy’s asked, a false smile plastered on her face.
“Oh, Megan said that V.I.P’s have to keep their costumes secret so that they can surprise everyone on the night, and so no one steals the idea. But I know what it is and you guys are gonna love the whole idea and concept!”
And now she’s smiling her “I’m doing you a favour” smile. She really shouldn’t have. Macy’s showing her signs of pre-rant: lips pursed, red cheeks, squinted eyes, furrowed brow… She’s about to erupt.
“Well, that’s fine Kel. Mel, Mace, you can come to mine and get ready!”
And Brooke managed to stop it. Urgh, Brooke. As much as I love her pacifist ways, for once, just once, I want Kelly to know that she can’t get away with everything.
“K, good. I’m so sorry guys! I really wish that I could have you guys round, but I can’t turn down the offer to be a V.I.P. And then show up to her party with you guys! That would just be rude! I’m gonna go get some water, does anybody want anything?”
Yeah, there is a lot I want. I want Kelly to either remove herself from my life, I want Macy and Brooke to see Kelly the way that I see her. I want a flat stomach, long hair, thighs that don’t jiggle when I walk and a smaller forehead.
“Melissa..? Do you want anything or not?”
“I’m fine.”
***
One thing I really hate about the feminine species as a whole is the bitchiness. I’m not gonna lie and try and act like I have never bitched about anybody, but over the years, I have learnt to keep my views to myself, because the second I express them, I wind up in a world of trouble.
I mean, as soon as Kelly left my room at the sleepover, Macy and Brooke went into full b**** mode. All I heard was; “She’s so selfish”, “She’s sucking up to Megan”, “Remember when that happened with”, “Like when we went shopping in” over and over again, and you know what? I didn’t join in. Ever. I was incredible proud of myself, I managed to maintain self-control in a situation where I could have really participated. Now Macy and Brooke have nothing to blame me for in that conversation and I got to listen to all their problems with Kelly, which actually made me happy.
And now I’m hoping that Macy and Brooke will actually carry out their threats and not talk to Kelly.
Macy and I our sitting – sorry – shivering our butts off outside in our usual spot. She hasn’t stopped talking about her costume calamity since I sat down. She’s gone into a vast amount of detail and I could literally tell you everything about the situation.
Basically, she went shopping with her mum after she left my house on Sunday and she found this really cute top (It was white and lacy) so she bought it and she wanted to wear it for Chelsea’s so she thought that she would be an angel or a fairy so she went to the party shop to get some wings and as it’s just over a month until Halloween the only ones that they had were black and black angel wings really didn’t go with her white lacy top.
“Why don’t you just ditch the angel idea and go as something else that’s white and lacy?”
I can hear Becki and Allison giggling behind us due to the fact they just made Macy and I jump with their random suggestion.
“So this is where you guys hide in the morning!” Becki’s exclaimed, walking over to the steps and sitting next to Macy, “We were bored in the classroom by ourselves so we walked around the grounds and thought that we’d try and find you guys! We brought you presents!”
Now Allison’s perching herself next to me, squashing Macy and I in the middle. I can smell the syrup and pancakes aroma wafting from the paper plates that they’re holding, and they’re offering us a plate each. I’m supposed to be on a diet this week, but oh well, I guess I’ll start tomorrow, can’t turn down free pancakes.
“We were gonna bring bacon, but then we didn’t know if you liked bacon, and everybody likes pancakes” Allison’s explaining, “Where’s Kelly?”
“With your bestest friend Megan most probably” Macy’s answered, rolling her eyes
“Have you heard? Megan is a V.I.P now!”
Ouch. You could hear the scorn in Becki’s voice as she said that. Who cares? I may as well join in;
“Oh we know, Kelly’s a V.I.P. too!”

10 things I still haven’t done a week before the party;
1.
I haven’t bought anything new to wear
2.
I haven’t got a cute pair of high heeled shoes to wear (mainly because my mum won’t let me wear any shoes over 2 inches high)
3.
I haven’t saved up the money to buy an outfit for the party
4.
I haven’t painted my nails
5.
I haven’t asked my parents if Macy and Brooke can come round
6.
I haven’t sorted out with Macy and Brooke whose house we are going to
7.
I haven’t decided what I am going to wear
8.
I haven’t decided what I am going to the party as
9.
I haven’t bought a present / birthday card for Chelsea yet
And the 10th thing I still haven’t done:
10.
I can’t even remember if I’ve RSVP’d
So Brooke’s house is out of the picture. Her 18 year old sister Lulu is having a house party that night, and she doesn’t want three 14 year old kids getting in the way.
Macy’s parents are getting a few rooms in her house renovated for the next few months, so we can’t get ready for Chelsea’s party at hers, and if we went to mine, we’d have to get the bus back so we wouldn’t get to mine ‘til 5:30.
Looks like we can’t go.
It’s a week before the party and Macy, Brooke, Allison, Becki and I are all in the same position – none of us have a clue what we are doing about this party.
This week feels so different. We’re eating in our normal lunch place, but Allison and Becki replaced Kelly because apparently, the week before her party, Chelsea’s V.I.P.’s must try and spend every waking moment with her - before, after and during school.
“So you’re hanging with us at the party, right?” Alisson’s asked while chewing on her tropical bubble gum. See, Alisson’s lucky. If I was that forward, I would be considered pathetic and needy, but because Allison’s higher up on the scale of popularity, she can get away with being so straight to the point. I guess now is as good a time as any for me to voice what has been going through the mind of Macy, Brooke and I.
“Don’t even know if we’re going.”
“Why?”
Why don’t I know if I’m going? Because, if I’m being honest, I don’t even like parties. They’re load and require effort, and you end up standing around in an uncomfortable outfit talking to around four people, ogling guys that you’re not going to talk to anyway. I only go because... Well... I guess I go because everybody else goes. It’s what’s expected of me socially. But I can’t tell them that. Instead I’ll just say;
“Dunno... Just can’t be bothered.”
“But you guys have to go! It will be fun!” Becki’s whining,
“About as much fun as it is watching Kelly run after Chelsea at school.” Brooke’s retorted, picking the lettuce out of her sandwich.
“Come on you guys! You can join in with our 10 minute challenges!”
“10 minute challenges?”
“Allison and I do them all the time! Basically, Allison and I will both come up with a challenge for us all to do at the party, and then we’ll see how many of us can do it in 10 minutes! The one with the most success wins!”
Ok, that actually sounds kind of fun, but I still don’t want to go. I’ve put myself off of this party, and now it just seems like too much of an effort to even try. I have the perfect excuse not to go;
“It sounds cool, but I still can’t. We have nowhere to get ready before the party.”
“Easy, get ready at mine!” Alisson’s suggesting, “I live 5 minutes down the road from here, and considering we’re all having bad luck with the costumes and we’re roughly all the same dress size, let’s all bring like 5-10 bits of nice clothes and accessories and shoes and then we can all mix and match!”
“That sounds really awesome! We’ll be there!” Brooke’s piping up,
Great. That means I actually have to go.
***
5 minutes. That’s all I have left. 5 minutes. 5 minutes ‘til I can leave school, 5 minute’s ‘til that bell rings and I can leave this free period and go to Allison’s house.
It’s been a relatively good day. It’s Friday. Chelsea’s party is tonight and I’m actually out of my slum. My parents have agreed to let me sleep over at Allison’s after Chelsea’s, which I’m still kind of shocked about.
You see, I thought my parents have this “Unless we’ve met the girl or the parents, you can’t sleepover” rule, but what I forgot was that Allison’s brother Kyle is really good friends with my brother Max, so they’ve already met her parents. When I asked my parents if I could sleepover at Allison’s they were like,
“Do we know Allison?”
“Yeah,” I lied, “You know, Allison Halden!”
Luckily, Dylan was then like, “Do you mean Allison - my friend Kyle Halden’s brother? Can Kyle come round?”
So then my parents decided that since they know Kyle’s parents I could go. They even rang up his parents and offered to let Kyle sleepover at our house on Friday so now Allison and I are both brother free for the weekend.
I haven’t actually seen Kelly all day. Which is probably why my day has been so good. Apparently, the day of Chelsea’s party, her V.I.P.’s cannot see anyone but her, but they have to come to this final registration. They can’t leave school without being registered.
And here they, OMG. OMG. OMG.
Oh.
My.
Gosh.
Macy and Brooke have just witnessed exactly what I have witnessed. I can tell because they’re trying just as hard as I am to fight back laughter. Kelly and Megan have walked into the classroom and... I’m speechless, plus, Kelly’s walking over and I need to stop the smirk on my face. I’m gonna have to keep my mouth closed. If I say anything to Kelly I will start laughing. There’s no alternative. I mean, I’m trying as hard as I can not to look her in the eyes as it is.
Brooke’s got that look in her eye. That look that show’s that she’s ready to stir trouble. And it looks like she’s gonna start now.
“Kelly, you’ve got a dodgy bright orange patch of fake tan somewhere,”
“Really, where?” Kelly’s asked, frantically checking her arms for patches
“Everywhere! Why are you and Megan bright orange?” And now she’s laughing. Yeah that’s right, Brooke is laughing at Kelly right in front of her face, and Macy and I are just sitting here with our lips pursed, at risk of opening our mouths and joining in.
“Oh,” And Kelly looks confused. Her brow is furrowed and everything. “Yesterday Chelsea paid for all of her V.I.P’s to get professional spray tans. Is it that obvious? It’s for our costumes!”
“What are you going as? A giant cheese puff?”
Brooke’s asked that with a dead serious straight face, but that’s too much for Macy and I. We’re off. We’ve erupted into a fit of giggles, not that Kelly cares. She’s just rolled her eyes and gone to talk to Megan again.
The minute I got home from school yesterday I rushed upstairs to start packing. I packed the usual - pyjamas (Just some boring checked shorts and a plain black vest top, my snowman pyjamas don’t leave the house), a change of clothes for Saturday, underwear, my spare hairbrush, and I packed my toiletries this morning after I used them.
Next was the hard part - finding the clothes for the party.
I looked through my wardrobe for possible costume related items, but to be honest, I was having trouble starting.
I thought about it logically. I don’t have many nice dresses for parties, so I packed the two I have:
I rushed upstairs to start packing. I packed the usual - pyjamas (Just some boring checked shorts and a plain black vest top, my snowman pyjamas don’t leave the house), a change of clothes for Saturday, underwear, my spare hairbrush, and I decided that I would pack my toiletries after I used them in the morning.
Next was the hard part - finding the clothes for the party.
I looked through my wardrobe for possible costume related items, but to be honest, I was having trouble starting.
I thought about it logically. I don’t have many nice dresses for parties, do I’ll pack the two I have I thought as I grabbed my short black chiffon dress with the one sleeve and my grey strapless and placed them in my bag. I have been in a lot of school productions and you normally get to keep the costumes, so I looked through those but all I found was a large camouflage T-shirt that I wore when I played a soldier, A deep blue shawl I got from a dance show and some maroon leggings which I actually hated because Maroon makes my legs look like tree stumps. I chucked them all in my bag too (Plus the baseball cap that matched the T-shirt - They’re kind of a matching set). 6 Items done, now why don’t I get some accessories? I thought.
I looked through my top drawer. My top drawer is the one with all my hair accessories. I found two old headbands. One with leopard ears attached and one with what I assumed were some type of monster ears attached.
8 items done, I’ve got to find 2 more. I chucked in my navy canvas trainers, the one pair of heels that I own (My mum doesn’t believe that I should be wearing high heels at such a young age), and I thought I’d go one extra and add the pair of suede pumps that I bought last summer.
It was almost 11pm by the time I was done choosing my ten items so I chucked in some basic make-up (you know, lip gloss, foundation, eye shadow, mascara, eye liner), stole a packet of strawberry laces from the place where Max hides his sweets, packed them in my bag and then went to bed.
And now there are 20 minutes. 20 minutes ‘til the end of the day. I’ve had to sit through double maths, a history test, art, geography and I have 20 minutes until RS is over. 20 minutes.
Kelly’s barely talked today, but then again she barely talks to us nowadays anyway. We didn’t even get a “Hi” this morning. It doesn’t matter though.
10 minutes. Allison’s smiling at us all - It’s a cheeky smile and it pretty much summed up everything we’re looking forward too.
Fun, laughs and a little pinch of crazy.

The 10 steps to get from school to Chelsea’s party
1.
Walk to Allison’s (She lives one of the roads near the school)
2.
Say hello to her parents and run upstairs
3.
Watch the TV in her room while Becki straightens Allison’s hair
4.
Compare outfit choices and choose what we’re going to wear
5.
Order pizza
6.
Get dressed
7.
Eat (Carefully)
8.
Apply makeup & finish hair
9.
Take pictures in front of her mirror
And the last thing that we need to do:
10.
Leave for the party in her mum’s car, ensuring what we are at least 20 minutes late
Allison’s house is actually huge - 4 floors, 6 bathrooms and 8 bedrooms.
Her room is massive - it has an ensuite bathroom and a walk in wardrobe, as well as a king-sized bed and a single bed for her cat. However, despite the enormity, we are all crowded in front of her full length mirror, trying to view our outfits from all angles. It took a while before we were all happy with our outfits, but if I do say so myself, we did a pretty good job.
Both Allison and Becki decided to go with the cat theme. Allison’s borrowed Brooke’s dark denim high-waisted shorts and Becki’s ¾ length, flowy, leopard print sleeveless top, wore her canvas black trainers, used my headband with the leopard ears attached, and dressed as a leopard. Becki’s dressed as a normal cat and wore a pair of black sequined shorts that she bought last week and had been “just dying to wear”, and a plain black vest top. She borrowed Macy’s black cat ears and got me to draw eyeliner whiskers on her cheeks.
Brooke’s stayed with her Minnie Mouse idea and paired Becki’s short black spotty skirt with her red halter neck, Macy’s red wedges, she’s left her hair out in its sleek black bob and borrowed her 6 year old cousin’s Minnie Mouse ears.
Instead of going for her angel theme, I’ve leant Brooke my black, one sleeved chiffon dress and she’s made the outfit complete with her black heels and the pair of black angel wings that she got from the party store, so she’s dressed as a dark angel.
And then there’s me, wearing Becki’s black high-waisted shorts, the baseball cap that I brought with me, Brooke cut my large camouflage print T-shirt and turned it into a relatively fashionable ¾ length flowy cropped top, and I’m pairing it with Allison’s black biker boots. Now, Becki’s drawing military lines on my face with some ugly green-black lipstick that she got free in a magazine.
“What time is it now?” Macy’s asked, as she’s curling the last of her straight hair.
“Ummmm...... 9:15!” Becki’s replied, checking the time on her phone and now she’s shoving her phone back down her bra.
“Perfect! We are officially fashionably late!”
“Well then we better go!”
***
The party started at 9:00pm and now it’s 9:30 and we’ve just come in. The party is in full swing and completely amazing - but a little over the top for my liking.
Everything’s pink and the club walls are decorated with picture after picture of Chelsea. There’s music pounding, lights flashing, people dancing, pale pink balloons all over the floor, (Apparently we’ve missed the balloon drop), pick and mix, rose balloon arches leading down the middle of the room and an area where you can go over and get a professional photographer to take your picture. There are neon pink lights attached to every wall that flash on and off in large capital letters reading, “YOU HAVE NOW ENTERED CHELSEA LAND”.
This is just surreal. I actually feel so small, and not because of my height. It’s like some big, bright maze of girlyness. I actually don’t know where to start.
“LET’S GO FIND KELLY AND MEGAN AND SEE WHAT THEIR OUTFITS ARE!” Brooke’s yelled over the music.
Gosh. It’s like walking through a main road. There are sweaty bodies everywhere, and we keep having to stop and budge our way past people. We’ve made our way around this place at least twice now, and I have seen no trace of Megan and Kelly anywhere.
I think Allison just yelled something about finding out where they are, but I honestly don’t know - I can’t hear anything over the music. Okay, actually I don’t know what she said, because now she’s walked over to some boy, and started talking to him. She’s on stereotypical flirt mode: twirling her hair, tilting her head to the side and letting out a coy giggle every couple of seconds. OMG. She’s taking out her phone and he’s taking out his. Wow. We’ve only been here about 5 minutes and she’s already got his phone number. She works fast. Okay she’s coming back. I should actually listen to what she’s saying.
“Eep! His name is Sam, he’s in year 9 at the boys school down the road, he likes my leopard ears and he gave me his number! Oh and he said that the V.I.P’s should be coming out any minute now.”
Ok, the music’s stopped. The DJ has just stopped playing music. And now he’s getting his microphone ready, sounds like they’re finally coming in.
“Visitors of Chelsea land; we invite you all to applaud the best friends of the woman that made this all happen, Give a big welcome to Chelsea’s V.I.P’s!!”
Oh. My. Actual. Gosh.
What are they wearing? Are they serious? How can they think that they look good? I mean, a cheesy pop song’s now playing, the backdoor’s been flung open, and the 5 of them are skipping down the aisle of balloon arches, all as orange as pumpkins, in light blue denim knickers shorts, bright pink sequined bandeaus and matching pink patent high heels.
Macy’s turned to Brooke and I with a shocked look on her face,
“Is it just me, or are Kelly’s butt cheeks totally hanging out of those shorts?”
I’m laughing. Brooke’s just raising her eyebrows. Now the song’s changed to an even cheesier pop song and the DJ’s speaking again.
“And now, I present the birthday girl herself, CHELSEA BILLAM!”
Wow. And I thought that the party couldn’t get any girlier. Chelsea is being pulled down the aisle by two muscular boys in light blue tuxedos inside a cardboard motorbike. A pink cardboard motorbike. And Chelsea’s standing up waving at people, wearing a pale pink strapless lacy corset tucked into a black tutu with bright pink bows on (it’s so puffy, I mean, it doesn’t even cover her thong) and bright patent high heeled boots that stretch over her knees.
Great. Kelly’s running over, grinning from ear to ear,
“What do you think? Guess what I am!”
This is really awkward. I mean, I could easily tell her what I think she is, but I’m pretty sure she wouldn’t like the answer. She’s waiting for an answer, it’s funny, she’s looking expectantly at everyone, and up close, she looks incredibly fake. To start with, she’s got pumpkin orange fake tan on, is wearing an excessive amount of foundation, has luminous pink glittery eye shadow on (Which, may I add, is applied extremely poorly – I mean it reaches her eyebrows, and not in a nice way), pink blush smeared all over her cheeks, she’s coated her lips in red lipstick and her hair looks longer, puffier and like straw towards the end. Hair extensions.
I think she’s given up with us guessing, everyone’s just staring at her in shock. She’s rolled her eyes and is carrying on anyway.
“I’m a Barbie doll! You get it? Basically, we’re all Barbie dolls and Chelsea is the lead Barbie!”
“No offence, but since when did Barbie Dolls wear sparkly pink bandeaus and denim hot pants?” Becki’s asked, still taking in Kelly’s lack of clothing outfit.
“Since Barbie became a teenager!” Kelly’s giggled, giving another little twirl.
I’m finding this incredibly hard to understand. I mean, yes, fair enough, she’s being forced to wear this by Chelsea but really? How can she think that this is a good idea? I mean, I feel uncomfortable enough in Allison’s shorts, and my butt cheeks can’t be seen by the public.
I’m so thirsty and the bar is selling one drink – a plastic cup of luminous pink lemonade. Like seriously, it’s just fizzy lemonade with some form of highlighter pink food colouring. I have to say though – these bar stools are really comfy – surprise, surprise, they’re pink. It is £2.50 for a glass of pink bubbly stuff, it’s ridiculous.
I may have to buy some though. I don’t know what it is but my mouth is so dry. Good, the bar tender’s coming over, time to order.
“Umm... Yeah I’d like a cup of...”
“Nothing. She doesn’t want anything!” Allison’s butted in.
“Why don’t I want anything?”
“None of you want anything, because I have your first challenge! You have 10 minutes to get a guy to buy you a drink”
I don’t think I can do that. That’s really awkward. And desperate. And weird. Macy and Brooke seem to be thinking the same thing, because they’re giving Allison the exact same look that I’m giving to her.
“Guys. A challenge is a challenge! Now you have 9 minutes and 43 seconds left, you should all get going!”
And we’re off. Kind of, I mean Becki pulled us all into the middle of the floor against our will. “Look for the shy, awkward ones!” She’s yelling over the music, “That’s probably our best chance at getting a free drink,”
It doesn’t surprise me that Becki has tips on how to get guys to buy us drinks - she’s kinda boy obsessed. If she wasn’t so nice and sweet, everybody at school would so call her a slag behind her back, but because she’s one of the friendliest people you will ever meet, everybody just ignores all the slag-like things that come out of her mouth.
“I think I’ve found one!” Brooke’s shrieked, and she’s pointing to a boy who’s standing by himself, staring at his feet, “What do I do now?”
“Talk, flirt, laugh at his jokes,” Becki’s listing, ticking the points off on her fingers, “Then ask him if he wants to go over to the bar and hint that you want a drink!”
“Okay, I’m going in,”
It’s funny watching Brooke talking to this guy, I mean he’s easily shorter than me – and that’s saying something. He looks about 4’9 and Brooke is easily 5’6/5’7, plus, she’s in wedges so she’s easily a foot taller than him – she’s literally towering over this guy and he looks really intimidated. Oh my gosh, they look so awkward together. They’re standing there looking lost for conversation, it’s kind of odd.
Becki’s obviously bored of watching them. She’s already searching the room for new prospects. I fact – she’s pointing to a tall, slightly lanky blonde guy standing alone by the DJ.
“Macy, you’re tall - that guy is perfect!”
And now Becki’s pushing a slightly confused Macy in his direction, wishing her good luck before she can even respond.
Now she’s turned towards me, “Okay, we have 7 minutes left and I have the perfect guy for you!”
She’s linked my arm, and she’s leading me through the floor, while explaining what she’s doing awfully quickly.
“His name is Danny; he’s in year nine like us, he’s really cute, I think he’s older than you, he liked me for a while, but we got over it and now we’re really good friends! He’s really sweet but I couldn’t go out with him because he’s shorter than me and I don’t date shorter guys, but you’re pretty short too, so you guys will be perfect!” She smiled as she continued walking.
“I’m not that short! I’m 5’2!” Ok, I admit, 5’2 is pretty short... But I plan to grow at some point.
“And Danny’s like... I dunno... 5’3? Ah, here he is. Danny, this is my friend Melanie, Melanie, this is Danny. OMG!!! You guys look really cute together!”
And now she’s gone. She’s left me alone with him. She’s right though, Danny is pretty cute. He’s got short, dark hair, brown eyes, the same kinda skin colour as me and OMG his smile is amazing. Plus his outfit’s pretty cool, he didn’t try too hard and it looks good. He’s in jeans, a navy striped shirt and he’s got a gold plastic crown on his head.
“Hi, so yeah I’m Danny”
He’s smiling at me. That smile is so perfect OMG. I can’t bring myself to talk. What is this? Why am I so awkward around guys? I need to do something. He must think I’m like... I dunno... stupid or something. Ok, I giggled. What is it with me and giggling? I do nervous giggles after everything, urgh I’m so weird. He’s staring at me expectantly. I need to say something. OMG.
“Nice costume! I like the top, it is really cool.”
See, now he’s complimented my outfit and I have said absolutely nothing. I feel really bad, he’s making an effort to make conversation and I’m being really awkward. I’m such an awkward person. I really need to work on my personality. I need to say something. I’ll just say thank you!!
“Thank you!!”
That came out in an abnormally high voice - but at least it came out. That was actually easier than I thought it would be. Ok, now I can lower my voice and speak some more.
“You look really cool! I like the whole royal theme, it’s really cool! And I like your crown, it’s really...”
“Cool?”
He’s got an adorably cheeky smile on his face. Why did I babble like that? Why do I feel the need to be so weird around people? I swear, I am in major need of fixing. Just keep cool. He’s joking around. All I need to do is smile and lie. Smile and lie.
“Actually, I was going to say nice! You’re crown is really nice!”
It worked! He’s laughing! Yay! It actually worked. I made casual conversation with a cute guy. Wow. I really need to get out more. Oh well, I still find it an achievement!
“Of course you were! So, are you thirsty or hungry or anything? ‘Cause I might get some of that un-natural looking lemonade. You want some?”
OMG. OMG. Wow. Wow. Fhdjksjfhds. He just asked to buy me a drink. And I didn’t hint or anything. Hjdfksdjfhs. I. Actually. Can’t. Believe. That. He. Just. Wow. OMG. Yes. Ahjsdkajhds. What do I do now?
Oh yeah. Answering him would be a good place to start.
“Actually, yeah... Um, I’m kinda thirsty, I might get some lemonade too.”
I think I’m getting better at this. I actually answered that in a calm, cool and collected manner... Ish. Anyways, we are actually walking over to the bar together. Right now, I actually love Becki. This is just perfect. And I still have 2 minutes left of this 10 minute challenge thing.
Ok, he’s gone to go and get me a drink while I sit at the bar. Looks like I’m not the only one doing well with this challenge; Sam’s talking to Allison again, Brooke’s at the bar with this new boy (tall with bright red spiky hair), however she hasn’t got a drink yet, Macy’s sitting awkwardly drinking lemonade next to the tall blonde from earlier and Becki’s sitting with her drink in one hand, making out with one of the boys in the pale blue tuxedos that had pulled Chelsea’s motorbike in.
Eep! Danny’s coming back, and he’s carrying two plastic cups filled with the bubble gum pink fizzy liquid. I should say something to him,
“Do you need me to pay you back for that drink?”
Please say no. Please say no. Please say no. Please say
“No, of course not”
OMG. He is actually perfect.
“So Melanie, Can I maybe have your number?”
Yes. Yes. Of course he can. I can’t believe he just asked that. WOW. Now I feel special. Really special. OMG, I must be grinning like an idiot. I feel like I’m grinning like an idiot. Urgh – I keep doing this. I need to answer him when he asks me stuff! He looks so confused.
“Um, yeah sure, why don’t I put in your phone?”
He’s handed me his phone. This is actually happening. A guy just bought me a drink and asked for my number. Yes, it may seem like nothing to most people, but I’m shy, awkward, short and I don’t exactly have the best figure... so this is a big step for me. And it’s all happening n...
“Hi Danny! Haven’t seen you in a while!” Urgh. Did Allison really have to come and interrupt now? She’s looking at the 2 of us and tilting her head to one side, “Aww! You two look really cute together! Anyways, Danny I need to borrow Melanie for a while, your friend Lewis is over their sucking Becki’s face, why don’t the two of you go and hang out?”
And now I’m being pulled away. No. No no no no no. NO. Why now? Seriously? Now I’m back to sitting where we were siting before we left for the challenging.
“Alright everybody, status report! Becki, we all saw you with your tongue shoved down Lewis Milann’s throat so we don’t need to know the details, let’s move on to Macy, how did it go for you?”
Macy’s sighing, looking kind of bored more than anything else, “He bought me a drink, but he was the most boring, awkward, annoying boy I have ever met! He didn’t want to talk, he just wanted to savour the moment and sit next to each other in silence! And when I asked him about himself he told me that he doesn’t like to exchange information until he knows someone properly! Thanks for pushing me towards him Becki!”
Becki still looks proud of herself though, “Sorry Macy, but I am a good matchmaker! Take Melanie for example!” And now the focus is on me again. “You and Danny looked like you were having fun! What happened there?”
Ok, I’m not gonna lie, I actually like being the centre of attention. I mean, it doesn’t happen very often. I tend to be a wall flower most of the time, so the occasional focus on me is good. Everyone’s looking at me expecting a good story though, and mine really isn’t very interesting.
“Um, he said he liked my outfit, but that’s really all that happened. He did buy me a drink though!”
Which I didn’t drink. My untouched glass of lemonade is still sitting on the bar.
“You guys look so cute together! What about you Brooke?”
Brooke’s sighed, “I didn’t get a drink. I got nowhere with Matt the short one, but Toby, the red spiky haired one asked if I wanted to go to the cinema with him next Saturday!”
Allison’s nodding her head in approval and turning back to Becki, “Okay everybody did well! Becki, time for your challenge. What is it?”
I can tell I’m not gonna like this. Becki’s got a really malicious smile on her face.
“Girls, it’s time to kiss and tell! Allison - you’ve got to kiss Sam, Brooke - you’ve got to kiss Toby, Melanie - you’ve got to kiss Danny and Macy - I’m gonna set you up with my friend Keith and you have to kiss him!”
No. I can’t do that. I’ve never kissed a guy and I’ve just met Danny, getting him to kiss me would make me desperate. And a slag. I actually can’t. And Becki’s looking directly at me with a smirk on her face,
“Problem?”
“I’ve just met Danny...”
“Don’t worry! I realised that! I have a plan!” Becki’s answered.
What is she doing? She’s gulping down the last of her drink like her life depends on it. Seriously – she’s draining every last drop from that little plastic cup, and now she’s standing on a bar stool and clearing her throat.
“ATTENTION! I DON’T HAVE A BOTTLE, SO WHO WANTS TO PLAY SPIN THE CUP?”
Oh dear.
This should be interesting.

The 10 people that are playing “Spin the Cup” (Other than Becki, Allison, Macy, Brooke and I)
1.
Danny - The cute, dark haired, really cool prince with the amazing smile, (The one who bought me the drink)
2.
Toby - The one with the red spiky hair (Which he explained that he and styled and colour sprayed just for the party) who was talking to Brooke earlier,
3.
Sam - The blonde haired boy that had spent most of the night with Allison (Though nothing had happened yet)
4.
Lewis - The boy who seemed to always have his tongue in Becki’s mouth. (Allison later told me that he was Danny’s best friend up until two weeks ago when he started dating Becki.)
5.
Keith - The other boy in the blue tuxedo that had brought Chelsea in. He looked like a Californian surfer with his blonde hair and tanned skin (apparently, his tan never wears off)
6.
Matt - The short one that Brooke had been talking to earlier. He was okay looking, the only problem I had was his hair - it made him look like a girl, it was like a black bob.
7.
Jason - The tall, boring boy that had bought Macy her drink in the last challenge
8.
Chris - Toby’s friend. He had also dyed his hair bright red and styled it spiky for the night. They were supposed to be from some old band.
9.
Kelly - Who took time out of her amazing V.I.P. schedule to come slum it with us paupers for about 5 minutes
And our 10th player:
10.
Megan - Who had come over with Kelly to see what we were doing and sat in our circle with a look that said “I’m not supposed to be with you people”
That’s right. It’s in literally every stereotypical teen movie that has a party scene.
We are playing spin the bottle (with a cup).
It’s actually happening. And I don’t know whether to look forward to this or run away.
We’re all gathered round in a circle on the floor of the food room because it’s the room where you can hear the music the least and it has dim lighting, (which Becki claims will ‘set the mood’)
There’s 15 of us – 7 girls, 8 boys, all the girls are all one side and all the boys are on the other.
I have been given 10 minutes to kiss Danny.
Any minute now, my heart is going to beat right threw my chest, and the butterflies are going to burrow their way out of my stomach. Becki’s words keep going through my brain:
“It’s a plastic cup, so it doesn’t spin very far, fake your spin and really just point it to who you need to kiss!”
I once had to have an operation because I got a bead stuck up my nose and had to get it surgically removed. Even then I was not as nervous as I am now.
Becki’s going through the rules one final time before we start. The butterflies in my stomach are on full swarm mode.
“Okay, the rules are pretty normal - If you spin it, you have to kiss whoever the open side of the cup points to. Girls do all the spinning, and if you’re a girl and it points to another girl then you can spin again. Who wants to start?”
And so the awkward silence begins. Everybody’s looking around, hoping that somebody will nominate themselves and get started. The only sounds around are the faint music in the background, and the beating of my heart.
“It was your idea! You start!” Megan’s snarled. Now she’s pursing her lips and giving Becki one of her signature Megan glares.
She really shouldn’t have done that, ‘cause now Becki’s raising an eyebrow back and smirking at Megan.
In a matter of seconds she’s fake-spun the cup in Lewis’s direction, jumped across the circle and now they’re swapping saliva. Megan looks mortified, Brooke and Macy are staring wide eyed, most of the boys look jealous and Allison just looks bored.
OMG. They’ve literally been kissing for 3 minutes. Seriously, do they not need air? Everyone looks really awkward Ok, they’ve stopped. Finally. Becki looks pretty smug though – she’s sitting back in her seat with a smug grin on her face and her arms are crossed.
“Anyone willing to go next?”
This is tense. She and Megan are exchanging death stares. Somebody needs to break the cattiness going on.
“I’ll go next!” Allison’s declaring,
Finally, the tension between the two of them is gone and everyone is back on focusing on the cup again. Allison’s spinning... and it’s Sam.
She’s raising her eyebrow at him and he’s smiling back, “I was hoping it would land on me”
And with that he’s leaning across the circle and is giving her a peck on the cheek. Allison really doesn’t look too happy. I mean, it was sweet how shy Sam was, but I think Allison expected more.
Ok, so we’ve already decided that the girls are doing all the spinning of the cup and that we’re going around the circle.
Which means I’m next.
Ok. I’m going to throw up.
I’m just sitting here, and this white plastic cup is lying in front of me. It’s taunting me. It knows that I’m not brave enough to do this.
This isn’t me. I don’t do things like this. I don’t play spin the cup, I don’t kiss guys, I don’t do dares or challenges. I’m boring and sensible and safe. Why am I doing this? Great now everyone’s waiting. They don’t think I have the guts!
Ok, they’re right, but they don’t need to know that.
It’s just a cup. It’s just a spin. It’s just a kiss. A kiss with a boy. Some random boy. With gorgeous eyes. And an adorable smile. I can not do this. I have to do this. Ok, I’m doing this.
The cup’s seems really fragile, like if I touch it will collapse. Urgh, ok now I’m just making excuses. I just need to spin it. Without it looking staged. Just point it towards him and act like I’m spinning it.
Ok. That wasn’t so bad, I can breathe again – the spin actually looked pretty realistic, I mean, it’s pointing directly at Danny.
Oh gosh. He’s looking from the cup to me. I shouldn’t have done this. What is he thinking? He looks really confused. This is not good. I need to say something to break the awkwardness and show that I’m not as desperate as the cup is making me look.
“We’ve just met; I get it if you don’t want to kiss me”
Ok. That was cool and calm enough. I’m quite proud of myself, I made it casual and reasonable and it kinda sounded like I don’t care. I do care though. If he says no I might shrivel up and die, right here right now.
“You have to kiss her! Those are the rules!” Becki’s protested.
I actually love Becki right now. Like seriously. I’m actually so glad that she’s enforcing the rules. If I were to be rejected by Danny I would never live it down. Never.
Ok he’s laughing – that’s good. Now he’s leaning across the circle. In front of me. Sfkksdjfhksldghjldskfj. OMG. His face is literally right in front of mine – Like, if I were to inch closer even slightly our noses would touch. Shoot. He must be able to see every tiny little spot on my face. OMG why did I just say that? Now I have grossed myself out. What if he thinks I’m grossed out by him? Happy face, happy face.
“I never said that I had a problem with kissing her!”
Ok, now my butterflies are flying around in a frenzy. He just said that in a really deep whisper and ended it with a chuckle. I can feel his breath on my face and it tickles slightly, it’s kinda cute. It’s really cute. He’s really cute. His chuckle is cute. His breath is cute.
Shoot. Shoot. Shoot. Shoot. He’s going in to kiss me. What if I’m not a good kisser? This is not the way to do this – with everyone watching. I can’t do this, I will not do this. Think fast....
Ok. I just kissed him on the cheek and made everything awkward. Why did I have to do that? That was awkward as fudge. Great I just made everyone’s evening awkward, I mean, his face – he looks really confused and slightly rejected. He’s staring into my eyes and his eyebrows are furrowed. His eyes. Are so perfect. And I just made them sad. I am a bad person. Ok, I’ll just smile and giggle. Smile and giggle.
“Okay, Kelly and I have got to get back to Chelsea like now so I’m gonna quickly take my turn,”
And the awkwardness is broken by the monster herself who has now broken Danny and I apart, spun the cup, watched it face Lewis and practically jumped on him, grabbed his head and given him a big old snog before whispering “Text me later babe,” in his ear and getting up to leave with Kelly following behind her.
Becki looks heartbroken, and angry and jealous and vulnerable at the same time, but she’s brushing it off and carrying on.
I don’t care. Megan made it more awkward than I did.
Just saying. 

The 10 things that I need to do before school tomorrow;
1.
Write an essay reviewing the Class Book that we read in English,
2.
Complete page 24 ex. 1, 2, & 4, page 25 ex. 5, 6, 7 & 8, and the whole of page 26 of my maths text book in my exercise book (Why does my teacher feel the need to kill me with homework over the weekend?)
3.
Research some artist (That I forgot to write down the name of) and present it in a creative way for art homework,
4.
Text Macy and ask for the name of the artist that we have to research,
5.
Finish off writing up the method and conclusion for the Chemistry experiment that we did last Thursday,
6.
Remember what we did in Chemistry last Thursday
7.
Check with my mum to see if my uniform is in the washing machine,
8.
Make sandwiches and keep them in the fridge, ready for tomorrow,
9.
Shower, wash hair and shave legs,
And the last thing I need to do:
10.
Pack bag and actually get some sleep
It’s 1:00pm on Sunday and I am knackered. After being picked up from Allison’s yesterday, I was dragged to some family gathering thing and my parents made us stay until midnight, after I had barely slept at Allison’s. I couldn’t even sleep in this because I had a Judo lesson at 10:00am, followed by church. I showed up to both the lesson and church looking an absolute mess in my huge grey hoodie, black leggings and messy bun. I can’t even remember how either went – I’m so tired. All I know is that I came home, went straight upstairs and now I’m here, in my room, getting started on the mountain of homework that’s all in for tomorrow.
I’ve finished my chemistry, and I’m attempting to concentrate on my maths before falling asleep. Ok. So I need to solve some equations - fun. Algebra would be fine if my brain understood maths.
Bedroom door’s opening. I need a lock. Badly.
“Max, what are you doing in here?”
“I was making myself some hot chocolate, so I made you some too.”
Max? Making me hot chocolate? Ok it’s happened – either I’m hallucinating or someone had kidnapped my brother and sent a replacement. Hmm, it smells normal, it looks normal.
“Max, I am not in the mood for your jokes so just tell me what you put in this hot chocolate!”
I knew it! He did something, because now he’s staring at his feet guiltily and quickly swapping his hot chocolate with mine,
“Okay, I may have put a load of salt in yours for a laugh, but I’m sorry. Have mine - I really need to talk to you.” And now he’s invited himself in and has perched on the edge of my bed.
“I don’t really think I feel like hot chocolate anymore, and I’ve got a tonne of homework to do so if you want to talk, you’re gonna have to make it quick and to the point.”
Ok, this might actually be serious – Max is gulping and looking at his feet again. Maybe I was too blunt, I mean, he looks generally worried about something. “You’re a girl, right?”
Worry over – now he’s just being stupid. “No. I am not a girl. In fact, I’m a boy, just like you! Have been all my life”
“Well that explains your outfit!” He’s got a silly smug expression on his face. I do not have the time of the energy for this.
“LEAVE. NOW.”
“I’m sorry! I’m sorry! Please! I actually wanted to ask you something important!”
“Well what is it then?”
Now I feel bad – I may have snapped at him, but to be fair, I’m tired and in the last 10 minutes he has insulted me and put salt in my hot chocolate. His face has changed though – he looks kinda sad and embarrassed. Now I definitely feel bad. Ok, I need to show a little sympathy.
“Ok Max, I’m sorry, seriously, if you have an issue you can tell me!”
He’s looking seriously embarrassed. Is he being bullied? Or beaten up? I don’t care about age, I will personally go all judo on anyone who is hurting my brother.
“What kind of things do girls like?”
Ok. Now I’m kind of confused. That was totally not what I was expecting.
“Max, why do you want to know what girls like?”
“Because I just wanted to know okay?!”
Ooooh, Max just snapped at me! Defensive attitude, eyes on feet, non-Dylan behaviour. I know exactly what that means.
“What’s her name?”
His expression just went blank. I am so totally right. Dylan is in crushville – population: him.
“What’s whose name?”
Please. He can’t try and confuse me now! I’m not that easily confused.
“What’s the name of the girl you like?”
“What? What are you talking about? I don’t like anyone! Why would you even... Ok, her name is Rosie.”
“Awwww! That’s so cute! You’re first crush!” My little bro’s growing up! Having his first crush! Ok, this requires major teasing, “Max and Rosie – sounds like an adorable couple!”
“Never mind! I knew I shouldn’t have asked you! I’ll go search online for the answer!” And now he’s leaving. Shoot, ok, I might have played that wrong, “See! THIS is why I salted your hot chocolate!”
Ok. I did a bad thing. Time to fix this and run after him, “Wait! Max! I didn’t mean to...”
SLAM. His door. In my face. Meh, I’ll apologise later. He has to forgive me - I have so much on him that it would be a very risky move if he didn’t.
Ok let’s see, Macy’s come back with the art homework and after a quick google, I have found out how long this thing is. I’ll do that later. I’ve pretty much sure that I’ve done most of the stuff I need to do today – I’d apologize to Max for making fun of his little crush, but he’s in the shower.
Nothing to do – May as well eat.
“Melanie, is that you?” I swear, I can’t go downstairs without being called to do something.
“Yeah it’s me! Just coming down to get some food”
“Ok, well could you go upstairs quickly and just knock on the bathroom door and tell Max that he needs to get ready in the next 5 minutes, he’s got to bake something sweet to give to his class tomorrow!”
Perfect! I’m bored, Max had a chore he needs to complete, and he’ll have to forgive me if I help him out!
“Don’t worry! I’ll bake something nice for Max’s class!”
“Why? What’s in it for you?”
“Dad! I’m fine! I’m just helping out my brother!”
Ok, now the interrogation is over, time for some apology baking. What to bake, what to bake? I will play it safe, bake his favourite cookies – oat and raisin.
Let’s see: Bowl, hand-whisk, butter, sugar, flour, baking soda, eggs, oats, raisins. Now time to roll the mix into balls and squish them onto oven trays.
“What are you doing?!”
And there’s Dylan – standing in the doorframe with his angry face and superhero pyjamas. Sorry, no. He is being too rude to the person who is baking cookies for his class, whether I owe him an apology or not.
“I’m sorry, what did you say?”
“I said, what are you doing?”
Ignore the rudeness. You owe him. Deep breaths - smile through the attitude.
“I made cookies for your class tomorrow!”
“What flavour?”
“I made your favourite, raisins and oats! Look - I’m really sorry about earlier when I made fun of...”
“Are you trying to get me killed?! I can’t take healthy cookies to school! I’ll be made fun of! This is the first Monday of the month and this time it’s my turn to bring in the home-made morning snack. People want sugar!! And chocolate!! And Fat!! Nobody wants healthy raisins and oats!!!”
Wait – Is he being serious?! I have just wasted a good half hour of my life making cookies for him and he’s yelling at me for making his cookies too healthy! No. That’s not right. He does not get to do that!
“You know what? I don’t know why I bother! Throw the cookie mix away, eat it, do what you want with it! If you don’t care about them then why should I? There is a box of brownie mix in the cupboard; they taste 100% fake and are filled with sugar, chocolate, fat and all the E numbers that you need to be popular with your little classmates! Have fun”
Let him be upset with me! I don’t even care about apologising anymore – If he’s being an annoying little brother then I can be an annoying older sister.
I don’t care about Max, I don’t care about cookies, I don’t care about anything!
Except homework.
I still have English and art in for tomorrow and I don’t really want detention

The author's comments:
More to come :) In the process of editing at the moment.

10 Things that really annoy me about my brother
1.
He is such a snitch,
2.
He locks himself in the bathroom and sits in the middle of the floor just so I can’t get in
3.
He has the most annoying friends
4.
He has the worst dress sense
5.
He is a pig when he eats
6.
He is rude
7.
He is insensitive,
8.
He’s a jerk
9.
He steals stuff from me
And the most annoying thing about Max:
10.
He holds grudges
Sleep is just amazing.
Drifting off in a dream, snuggling under covers, feeling toasty warm and having your worries temporarily melt away… It’s just perfect.
“Melanie!”
You know what isn’t amazing? Being woken up from a perfect sleep.
“Melanie! Have you not woken up yet?!”
Urgh, mum’s voice is getting closer, any minute she’s gonna knock on my door and actually force me out of bed, but you know what? Five more minutes won’t hurt anybody.
“It’s 7:40!”
Wait. What?! How did this happen? I have an alarm that goes off multiple times every morning, I should have heard it! Is she sure it’s 7:40? Shoot. Where has my alarm clock gone? It was on my bedside table last night and now it’s not. In fact, looking around my room, it’s not in here at all.
Well, right now I have more important things to worry about than my clock being missing. It’s 20 to 8 and I’m usually at school by 10 to. That’s not happening today. Let’s see… Takes my mum 20 minutes to drive there, and if you take into account the traffic, that’s a 30 minute drive. If I leave in 20 minutes I can still get to school on time. Problem solved, just need to run to the bathroom and be as quick as I can.
19 minutes
It’s locked. The bathroom door is locked. And I now have 18 minutes to leave the house.
“Max! I’m really late, how long are you gonna be?”
“Dunno, as long as I need, to be honest.”
Why is he being so smug? Urgh, I do not have time for this, I have 17 minutes to get to school.
“Well, what are you doing in there?” Silence. All I can hear is the hallway clock ticking. “Max, seriously. What are you doing in there?”
“Sitting on the bathroom floor, washed and dressed. I’ll be here ‘til 8:30.”
Is he serious? Does he want me to kill him this morning? I have 16 minutes. 16 flipping minutes to be out of the house, washed and dressed, and I’m standing outside of the bathroom in my pyjamas because my brother wants to be funny.
“Max. I’m giving you 10 seconds to be out of the bathroom.”
“Or what?”
“Or…. MUM!!!” I hate to pull the mum card, I’m not a snitch. To be honest, I haven’t even yelled loud enough for her to actually hear me, but it’s enough to get Max to unlock the door and exit the bathroom with a scowl on his face. Point: me.
15 minutes.
Time for a quick rush inside the bathroom. Teeth, mouthwash, exfoliate and rinse done in 5 minutes, which is pretty good for me.
10 minutes.
Quickly – bedroom, uniform, hair, bag (pre-packed from last night – thank goodness). 1 minute.
A Dash down the stairs, out the door and into the car where mum and Max are waiting. That’s right. I don’t know how, but I just managed to get ready in 15 minutes.
***
Ok, I’m finally at school and its 8:26, 4 minutes until registration. The classroom’s packed, yet Macy, Brooke, Becki, Alison, Megan (Urgh), or Kelly (Even more urgh), are nowhere to be seen, and I’ve scanned the classroom like 3 times now. Oh well, might as well dump my bag on my desk and go and join Natasha and Valerie for a chat (They’re really nice and funny and would probably be super popular if they didn’t refuse to follow trends.)
So, Becki Allison and Megan have entered, along with Ms Baldon, so now everyone’s back in their seats. There is still no sign of Kelly, Macy or Brooke, so I’m sitting on our row of 4 by myself, looking like a loner. Perfect.
“Melanie?”
“Here.”
Great, now everyone’s staring, and silently judging, wondering why my friends have ditched me because I’m sitting alone. I just need to make myself look busy, fiddle around in my bag or something, anything to make me look less sad, lonely and pathetic.
“Ok, so Brooke, Macy and Kelly’s bags are here, but they are not, Melanie, did they tell you where they were going?”
Seriously. Why did Ms Baldon have to go and make the situation awkward? I can actually feel everyone’s eyes boring into my soul. I have to play this right, be casual, and make it sound like I’m fine with sitting by myself. I’m fine that my friends are probably having fun somewhere without me, all because of my stupid alarm clock. I am 100%, totally, completely fine. I will be fine, just need to plaster my face with a fake smile and speak.
“Um, I dunno, I was late this morning! I’ve just come in!”
Perfect. Now all I need to do is carry on my signature ‘act confused to hide the shame’ look until everyone stops staring.
That took like 10 seconds. Am I seriously that boring? Everyone lost interest in 10 seconds. I am slightly offended. And still alone. What is this? And what is my first lesson this morning? I’m pretty sure it’s history… Or PE… Or English… Or Maths… I don’t know, something educational. I really should check my planner. And, if I check it, there’s the bonus that I’ll look busy and un-aware of the fact that I may as well be in solitary confinement. 5 more minutes ‘til the end of form, come on, I can be strong for another 5 minutes. Seriously, where are these 3? There bags are on their desks but they’re M.I.A.
4 more minutes…
“Girls, you’re late.” Ms Baldon’s staring at the door.
Oh my gosh. It’s them. Kelly, Macy and Brooke. They’re strolling in the classroom giggling and apologising, sitting down in their seats, filling the row, completely oblivious to the fact that they abandoned me this form time and are rubbing their fun in my face.
“Where were you?”
Ok, that sounded way too angry. Not that they’ve noticed I’m angry, I mean I don’t think that Brooke’s even noticed I spoke and Kelly… Well, she doesn’t care.
“We went for a walk around outside and lost track of time” Macy’s whispered back,
“Oh, hi Melanie! Didn’t even notice you there!” Brooke’s added gleefully, “Are you ok?”
No. I’m slightly annoyed because whenever Macy, Kelly and I go for walks around the fields in the mornings, we always make sure to keep checking the classroom for Brooke! Do I not mean anything to them?!? Not as much as Brooke does, obviously. Urgh. I could rant and cause drama, or I could act ok and let this slide. I choose option number 2.
“I’m fine.”
Good. That actually sounded believable. Just need to wipe the moody look off of my face.
***
Ok, so now I’m pretty sure that I really am not thought of as part of the group. This morning didn’t get much better after registration.
After the end of registration bell rang, I had trampolining with Kelly (Macy and Brooke chose to take tennis instead). It was easy to forget about the morning incident because Megan, Becki and Allison take trampolining too and there are only two big trampolines, so when you are not one of the 2 people jumping, you’re standing around spotting people (Or in our case, standing around chatting while pretending to spot).
Becki, Allison and I did the usual: stood around, had a good conversation about Sam and Lewis, laughed at Allison when it was her turn to jump (She’s super scared of jumping on a trampoline), and stared in awe at Becki (She is amazing at trampolining).
However, as soon as trampolining was finished we went into the changing rooms and got changed and I went to go see if Brooke and Macy had finished changing but they weren’t by their sports lockers and their bags weren’t outside of their lockers so I left the changing rooms.
Our sports department is separate from the rest of the building so you have to walk down this path that leads to a side entrance to the main building. As I was walking down the path, guess what I saw? A few metres in front of me was Brooke, Macy and Kelly all linking arms as they strolled down the path laughing.
That was the moment that I was abducted and overtaken by the green eyed monster.
Now I’m sitting in English, waiting for our teacher to show up, while ignoring whatever conversation is happening between my “friends” and ranting in my head.
I’ve never liked Kelly, but now, I hate to say it, but I’m downright jealous of her.
She has ignored Brooke and Macy for almost a month, she looked at them like they were dirt at Chelsea’s party, and she is constantly blowing them off for better offers, yet they are still putty in her hands. I, on the other hand, am nothing but nice to them, am always the person there to talk to, lend them money, listen to every little petty problem that they have and yet, as soon as Kelly shows up, I am completely invisible. I honestly don’t understand how that makes sense at all.
I am on rage mode.
It also didn’t help that when I first got to English, Kelly and Brooke were in their usual 2 seated desk and when I went over, sat in my normal seat next to Macy and asked what we were talking about, they all went silent, and Kelly mumbled a quick
“Nothing don’t worry,”
Before Macy turned towards are and went,
“Well anyway I’m so sorry Kelly! I really wish I could!”
Yup. That’s right. I am being left out of conversations now too. May as well not be here at this rate.
Finally our English teacher, Mrs Dawson’s come in, asking for our homework. I know that this makes me sound like a complete geek, but I’m actually looking forward to handing in my essay – I spent time on it and it’s 5 pages long, well structured and if I do say so myself, the best piece of English homework that I have ever written.
Just need to get it out of my… It’s not there. It’s not in my English folder. No. No. No. It has to be there. Ok, I just need to stay calm. It was there when I packed it last night, it probably just fell out in my bag. I just need to have a rummage through my school bag, I’ll find it lying at the bottom and I’ll laugh about how silly I was for panicking.
Except it’s not there. And Mrs Dawson is making her way around the classroom quickly. Where is it? Where is it? Where is it? Where is it? It’s not there. It’s actually not there. All that I have lying in the bottom of my school bag is a tin of lip balm, hand sanitizer and… Wait… There’s a random piece of paper at the bottom of my bag, and it has writing on it.
Let’s see you try to tease me when you’re in detention for forgetting your English homework! From Max
He didn’t. No way. Is he serious? He actually took my English homework. And left a note? I hate him. So flipping much.
“Melanie! Homework?” Mrs Dawson holding out he hand.
Ok. I can do this. I have seen many people talk their way out of detention, I can do this. I just have to be charming, and sweet and believable.
“Well, my printer at home was out of ink and I was going to print it out in the school one this morning, but it just wouldn’t print!”
She doesn’t believe me. I can see it in her eyes. She’s giving me a really confused look. She knows I was lying. Great, I’m going to get detention, and she’s gonna think that I’m a liar.
“Well, you never hand in your homework late so I will give you the benefit of the doubt. We have a lesson last period tomorrow, if it is not in by then, I will have to give you detention”
I did it! I pulled off a successful lie, and it worked!
Urgh, I swear – that’s the one good thing that’s happened today. The rest of the day has pretty much sucked, waking up late just ruined my whole day.
I hate alarm clocks.
I hate English essays.
I hate my brother.
I hate Kelly.
At this moment I even think I hate Brooke and Macy.
Great. I’ve been abducted by the green eyed monster of jealousy and the red eyed monster of anger. How is that even possible?
Looks like I’m sporting one green eye and one red one.
Urgh. Those 2 colours really clash.



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This book has 2 comments.


FifaAnam said...
on Jan. 9 2014 at 6:34 pm
Another relatable story for teenagers acoss the world! I'm sure everyone has been through the struggles of teenage dramas, and to read  that they are not alone in them is great to know. Continue with this story please! Would love to hear what's next! :)

MummyD said...
on Dec. 24 2013 at 5:38 pm
As a mum who hears the words 'I'm Fine' from her teenage daughter when I know there is something wrong. This gave me an insight in want really goes on in her mind. Keep going with this.