Facebook Activity



Teen Ink on Twitter

Report abuse Submit my work Share/bookmark Email Print Home

The Cullen Girl

Rate this article:
Author's note: This is my very first fanfiction I've ever written.
Author's note: This is my very first fanfiction I've ever written.  « Hide author's note
Chapters:   « Previous 1 2 3 4 5 6 ... 8 Next »

Meeting and Mixing everything up?

I walked into the room, the air was filled with freshly cut grass and the smell of the woods. It seemed amazing to be in a home where I can be loved and possibly accepted. Both Emmett-I guess that's his name, I haven't fully memorized their faces, so let's call the well built one that looks like a teddy bear that-and Jasper, I guessed it was Jasper, the way his face looked made him look like a Jasper. Edward, I think that's the other guy's name is, walked out quickly not even bothering to look at me. His bronze hair stood up as he caught my smell. He stood at possibly a few feet tall, possibly around 6'1.

I couldn't take my eyes off of them, they were inhumanely beautiful. But, weirdly enough, they looked nothing alike.

The room was covered in lilac wall paper, hammering in with portraits of flowers. Delicate like roses had outsmarted the rest of them by standing out the most amongst them all. There was also wooden floors below my now naked feet, nothing was on them except for socks. The bed had resembled one of those from the Victorian times. The comforter was as soft as a feather and as warm as a bowl of soup. Yes, very weird saying… but, I usually always describe things in that kind of way.

I looked towards the window. Ageless trees had blocked view of the condensing clouds that were now overhead. Rain had hit the glass window lightly. I wanted to lose myself in a daydream at that very moment. I imagined myself running into the forest, deeply into the heart of the woods. Where no could find me. I could only find myself there and no one else.

It then fled as soon as I heard a slight knock at the door.

"Well, I see you are calmly enjoying yourself." I turned to see a young girl, about the age of thirteen, walk in. She had the same bronze hair as the guy I figured was named Edward, and the beautiful woman, Bella? Yeah, let's call her that, She also had a mixture of Bella in her. Chocolate brown eyes that were amazingly mysterious and beautiful.

"Yeah, I am… so, you're Renesmee?"

"Yes… and you're Milla… now that we got that out of the way, tell me about yourself." She sat down on my bed, patting the spot next to her for me to sit. I slowly walked over and sat next to her.

"Well, I've been moved from family to family after running away from each of them. But, what some of them don't know is… the second to last family I had began to abuse me, they neglected and domestically abused me. I couldn't bare to be there…. So I…"

"Ran away," she looked at the ground as she finished the sentence. I nodded. For a while we sat there in silence.

"So, I guess it's time for dinner." She sighed, she got up and left the room, I silently followed, not bothering to let her know I'm there.

Everyone was sitting at the table, Nessie, I assumed I should call her that besides Renesmee. What a mouthful it was, sat at the nearest chair right by a handsome guy. He, like all the others, was built, he had short hair and smile that was to die for, his eyes were also the type where you can get lost in. I hid behind the banister, brushing up against the stands of the staircase.

"So, where is she?" The tall man asked, holding onto Renesmee's hand.

"She should be down in a few minutes. I was just up there, and she seems even more quieter than me, and I'm a-" She was cut off by a hand hitting the table. They turned, the tall guy's nostrils flared. He gazed at me, a sly smile appearing on his face. The now golden brown eyes were all staring as the guy looked to the top of the banister.

"So, you're her?"

"I'm who?" I asked, quickly walking down the stairs and towards the others, keeping a short distance between us.

"You're Milla?"

"Milly for long ways."

They all smiled, I could sense that it was fake.

"Milla, food is ready." A woman, looked to be around thirty five, called to me, I guessed Esme. I walked over, each of them moving to give me a way to walk to an open chair. I sat there, dazing in thought as I began to pick at the spaghetti that was still sitting on my plate, untouched.

"Sweetie," Esme began, sitting at the chair besides me and placing a delicate finger on my hand. "I know you've been through a lot… but, please try and eat." She smiled happily. I smiled back, but deep down inside it wasn't a smile, it was fear.
Chapters:   « Previous 1 2 3 4 5 6 ... 8 Next »


Join the Discussion


This book has 37 comments. Post your own!

flutterbye1888This teenager is a 'regular' and has contributed a lot of work, comments and/or forum posts, and has received many votes and high ratings over a long period of time. said...
Dec. 22, 2013 at 4:28 pm:
  I think that you had Milla interact with Edward too much. Edward, at this point, would be completely enveloped with his new family.   They don't actually have conventional "fangs"   When introducing the characters, you probably shouldn't say things like "lets call her Bella," or "I guess I can call her Nessie," just because those nicknames were in the books and movies. Have the caracters ask her to call them those things after she uses t... (more »)
 
Reply to this comment Post a new comment
 
Tara_Tomlinson_99This teenager is a 'regular' and has contributed a lot of work, comments and/or forum posts, and has received many votes and high ratings over a long period of time. said...
Dec. 4, 2013 at 2:17 pm:
O.M.G this was awesome.
 
Reply to this comment Post a new comment
 
Tman2 said...
Dec. 3, 2013 at 5:59 pm:
same thing you did twilight justice love the foster home thing
 
Reply to this comment Post a new comment
 
Girlonfire12 said...
Sept. 12, 2013 at 8:07 pm:
Hey i loved the book you just need to continue it. i don't believe this is your first fan fiction u r so good look for mine it is called how i survived the hunger games.
 
Tman2 replied...
Dec. 3, 2013 at 5:58 pm :
You did a really great job I like the story and style
 
Reply to this comment Post a new comment
 
101929 said...
Apr. 26, 2013 at 2:29 pm:
nicely done! creative ideas!
 
Reply to this comment Post a new comment
 
Naadz said...
Aug. 2, 2012 at 3:36 am:
I love the book, but I want more! Please continue this book... I really really liked it! The plot is so great.. You really have a vivid imagination!:)
 
Reply to this comment Post a new comment
 
Alynumber4 said...
Jun. 19, 2012 at 5:11 pm:
I like the idea of this book, and the writing is pretty good, but I find myself confused by a lot of the English used. English is my first language, and I'm fairly sure that alot of this is not using correct grammar. I'm not looking to really critique you or anything, but some of the paragraphs in which really important things happened I ended up having to re-read and spend a few moments speculating about what you had meant to say, which made it hard to get lost in the story. Try having someone ... (more »)
 
Reply to this comment Post a new comment
 
Lacer said...
May 18, 2012 at 3:27 pm:

Hmmhmmhmm. I know this is Twilight fanfiction, and I generally dispporve of fanfiction. It tends to be sloppy, and done in an hour over a wave of enthusiasm.
But, I do admit, the first page is done okay. No, I'm sorry to say I can't tell you that its good, and it does need improvement, but that's why I review, hmm?

First off, your usign first person narrative because Stephanie Meyer did it, and you want to be a character in the story. That is the weakness of all... (more »)

 
Branderz replied...
May 18, 2012 at 3:58 pm :
Thanks for the advice... But, I wasn't putting myself in the story whatsoever.... I also made this character up
 
Lacer replied...
May 18, 2012 at 4:41 pm :
It's a common association.
 
Moayo lest replied...
Feb. 4 at 12:21 am :
I really love the plot to the story but im dying for more. and some romance would be relly cool to. just a suggestion. the end kinda confused me but it just added to the suspence.
 
Reply to this comment Post a new comment
 
Andra said...
Feb. 5, 2012 at 12:44 am:
is it free to post a novel? im new.
 
DirectingGabs replied...
Feb. 11, 2012 at 6:54 pm :
Yess it is.
 
AHPK0 replied...
Feb. 12, 2012 at 3:34 pm :
thank you for your help
 
Reply to this comment Post a new comment
 
UNserieswriter said...
Dec. 5, 2011 at 6:57 pm:

having written both my stories from multiple points of view, i suggest you refrain from explicitly saying things like:

"From Alice's point of view."

Instead try to make it clear through thoughts, conversation, surroundings, and the characters actions who is currently holding the point of view.

Just some friendly advice. :)

Just some friendly advice

 
Reply to this comment Post a new comment
 
princees yui said...
Nov. 22, 2011 at 2:55 pm:
sorry.not 2 be mean but totally 2 SHORT!But it was creative.
 
Reply to this comment Post a new comment
 
msoledadvc said...
Nov. 2, 2011 at 10:53 pm:

Well, I think I'd better tell you before that sometimes I don't understand because my "mother language" isn't English, if not Spanish. So I'll read it again more carefully and try to understand. ;)

But I really love this book!

 
Branderz replied...
Nov. 3, 2011 at 6:50 am :
Aww thanks and it's okay :)
 
msoledadvc replied...
Nov. 4, 2011 at 1:41 am :
:) Just telling the truth.. By the way, do you know how to tag an article as favorite?? I haven't still figured it out, help?
 
Reply to this comment Post a new comment
 

Launch Teen Ink Chat
Site Feedback