Teen Ink

lots of dialogue! good tho!

Your opinion has been noted. Goodbye!

I just love it. 

Can I just ask why you created these feelings between Harry and Hermione - and why you thought they could ever betray Ginny (who is pregnant, apparently) and Ron, who is very much in love with Hermione - whose feelings are mutual. Don't get me wrong, you have a real talent for writing, but I just wondered why you forced this storyline, which would never have happened! I can understand why you might think that, though!

I don't think you should have made this a fan fiction - don't get me wrong, I think you have a real talent for writing, but if you were really doing a follow-up book (which super-fans like me would have loved), then you should't have done it like this - firstly, it turned into Twilight halfway through, and then character's relationships got twisted. None of this would ever happen, write to JK Rowling and see for yourself! I think she would be very upset about what y... (more »)

I think you ruined the relationships between Harry, Ginny, Hermione and Ron...you turned Hermione into someone she's not, and totally discarded Ron and Ginny - and Malfoy being in love with Hermione? None of this makes sense! None of these characters had these 'secret feelings' for each other - no offence, as I'm sure you spent a long time on this - but personally, I think this would have worked as a normal book, not fan fiction. Any reader of the books knows this would never hap... (more »)

I knooooooow lol I have SOOO many mistakes haha and I am so sorry!! This idea for this came so suddenly and I just typed, typed, typed not even regarding the mistakes! But I promise you I will fix everything when I revise it!! I've been so busy, I haven't had time to do it! But thank you for the comments, I will fix them as soon as possible. Stay tuned and happy reading! :D

Me and my friend were reading this. My opinion: I loved how deep you went into the relationships. It was cool to see everyones perspective. You should definitely keep writing fan fictions. Great job! My friend who is also HP fangirl crazy says: 1. Ginny's eyes are brown not green 2. Why is sirus not mention with all the people who died, dumbledore too 3. It felt kinda choppy 4. She liked it overall, but she is completely obsessed and memorized every word of the series and know a bunch of ran... (more »)

I love this, your like a mini J.K Rowling. I think Harry should go back to Ginny though, but I don't know about Hermine. Please post more!!!

how dare you defile the noble and sacred works of J.K Rowling!

I only read the first page so far and it seems great but one miner detail got me. i may be wrong but im pretty sure Hermione cast the spell on her parents knowing that she could later go to them and reverse it. i could be way off but you might want to check it out. :)