I'm in love with my bully | Teen Ink

I'm in love with my bully

June 29, 2017
By Firefox511, Elk Rapids , Michigan
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Firefox511, Elk Rapids , Michigan
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As the loud obnoxious sirens inch closer and closer to my house I could hear…. Wait I should start from where my whole wild adventure began. First off my name is Seán William McLoughlin and I have extremely bad depression. I also cut but my mom doesn't know yet. I'm going to be transferring from my home country. Always gloomy, non stop down pouring Ireland. To sunny mesmerizing L.A. because my mom got a new job as a teacher. Surprisingly her new job pays a lot more than being an executive chef back in Ireland. The number one thing I'm going to miss the most about Ireland is my teachers at my old beaten up, small, horrible smelling place called a school. I didn't have any friends throughout primary and the beginning half of my first year of secondary school. I'm moving to L.A. before the second half of secondary school begins.
     ~1 week later~ I just got done moving into our fabulous new house in gorgeous, sunny L.A. I'm starting school tomorrow I wonder if I'm going to get bullied again just like I was back in Ireland for being gay. That's one of the reasons my depression is getting a whole lot worse. After I got all settled in and unpacked my mom yells up to me, “Seán dinners ready come down and eat.”
     “Ok I'm coming give me a second!” I yell back down to her as I get off my bed to head down. As I sit down at the dinner table with my food my mom asks me “how do you like the new house is it to your liking?”
     I say back to her, “mom I love the house but I'm perfectly fine with a big or small house as long as you can afford the rent then it makes it our home.” I smile her way and she smiles back at me with tears streaming down her face.
      I get up to comfort her and then she whispers to me as I hug her, “Seán I could never ask for a better son ever I'm glad I have you in my life and I can count on you just like your father counted on me to keep you happy.” I start to tear up because I remember the night my father died. I was about 12 years old on a cold rainy blissful night after dinner my mom came in my room and said, “ I'm so sorry but your beloved father has passed away from trying to stop a horrible street fight defending a poor high schooler.” After I heard that my whole body shut down and something inside of me just snapped like a twig breaking beneath someone's foot. I was devastated but I knew that since my dad wasn't around anymore I was the one that had to protect my mom with my entire life and whole heart. I smile as I detached myself from my mom and told her good night.
     She smiled back at me and said,”goodnight dear have a peaceful sleep and have sweet dreams tomorrow is a big day for both of us.” Before I went upstairs I gave my mom a hug and a kiss on the cheek then went to my room to sleep. As I got to my bedroom I only thought of the bad things that might happen at this new school. I soon let slumber take my week tired body and engulf me to my happy place as I slept.

I wake up with a loud groan as I hear my mom walk in my room and say in a sweet, gentle but loud enough voice so I could wake up, “ sweetie wake up time for your first day of school since we moved here.”
    I say in a quiet scratchy voice,” I'm up I'm up give me a couple of minutes.” She giggled and then pulled back the blinds to my window to make sure I don't fall back asleep. About five minutes went by and I was finally dressed. Soon enough my mom yelled up to me saying breakfast was ready. I told her ok then ran down the steep stairs rushing to the kitchen. When me and my mom got done eating I grabbed my school stuff and my mom got her purse and the keys to the car then we set off to the school. I can't lie I'm so nervous for my first day of school here in L.A. I wounded what the people there would think of me and more importantly will my depression get better, or get worse if that's even possible. It's a 30 minute drive to the school from our house which is a lot shorter than the drive to school back in Ireland. Soon enough my mom and I arrived to tall brightly colored red school. All of my nerves began to jumble up in knots I was immensely nervous to go to this new school. The same thoughts ran through my mind as we approached the school, “what if they don't like me?, what if I get bullied even worse?, what if anti comes back!?” Then it hit me I can't let anti comeback he will ruin my life even more. Finally we reached the school and we entered. “No turning back now” I said to myself. We head towards the school office and by golly it was enormous. My jaw dropped from amazement. My mom looks over at me and giggles then said,”Seán close your mouth” I looked at her quickly shut my mouth and blushed from embarrassment. As my mom left the office to go to her classroom I was left there waiting the person that the office lady called down to show me around the school. Her name was Signe. As soon as she walked into the office she greeted me with a warm smile that made me smile. Now I do have to admit she was drop dead gorgeous and if I wasn't gay then I would ask her to go out with me but since I am gay I would just like to be her friend or even her best friend. Then I hear a warmly hello nice to meet you come out of her mouth.
     I said back to her,”hello nice to meet you to you must be Signe”. She answers my question with a simple nod.
     She then says,”and you must be Seán”.
   I nod then I corrected her,”yes my real name is Seán but I like to go by Jack”.
     She then gently nodded again and said,”well let's get on with the tour shall we”. I nod and she leads me out of the office but as soon as I get out of the door a tall handsome guy with red hair knocks me to the ground. As try to get up off of the cold hard floor with Signe’s help he glares down at me and says with a chilling tone,”watch where you're walking you green haired dweeb.”
    I then look up at him saying with a furious tone,”I'm sorry for whatever I did to ye but you're te one that ran into me so I suggest that ye take your own advice flame haired wannabe and watch where ye going.” Next thing I know I'm being lifted off of the ground and pinned up against the lockers by the jerk that ran into me.
    He says to me with a growl,” hehehe so you think you can just talk back me to like that you grassed haired Irish brat well looks like the new kid needs to be taught a lesson huh.” As he pulled back his arm  I didn't flinch I already knew what was going to happen to me and I was used to it. He then balled his hand into a fist getting ready to punch me Signe yelled at the guy that was going to punch me.
She said,”MARK LET HIM GO IT WAS YOUR FAULT IN THE FIRST PLACE!” Then next thing I know I hear my mom come rushing out of her classroom and said in an annoyed and enraged voice to the guy so called Mark,”That's enough let go of my son or I will suspend ye Mark, and I know if ye get suspended one more time you're going to be in a lot of trouble with your dad, and you don't want to get in trouble with your dad now do ye?”
    Mark sighed and dropped me then said to me with a bone chilling voice,” This isn't over yet just so you know watch out and trust me you're going to wish you never talked back to me like you did.” He growled then left with it hands in his pockets mumbling something to himself. I hugged both my mom and Signe with a grateful smile.
    I then say to Signe,”Thank you guys so much for yelling like that Signe because if ye didn't then my mom would have never of came out and helped me with my little problem with Mark.” I then turned to my mom with a worried look on her face and told her the whole story about what just happened to me. She sighed then said,” well ye two better get on with that tour.” I nodded to her and then turned to Signe and told her let's go. She smiled and then started to show me around. ~7th period~ I was so happy the day was almost over and I have my mom for one of my classes but sadly I have Mark in all of my classes. It's only the first day and I'm already getting death glares. Dang that must be a new record for me. ~end of the school day~ finally te first day of school here is over and now I can get back home. To be honest it wasn't that bad. Of course as soon as I thought that it got a whole lot worse. As I got to the front doors of the school Mark and his gang grabbed me from behind and pulled me back into one of te school hallways. I sighed as I was turned around by one of Mark's goons. “What do you want Mark”, I said in an annoyed tone. All I got was a hardy chuckle. Then all of a sudden he pulled me from the tall one with brown short hair.
“Go easy on the new kid Wade”, Mark said holding back another chuckle.
    “What do you want with me this time Mark”, I said with a bit of anger.
    He turned back to me and said,” I noticed that you didn't even flinch when I was about to hit you,”
“Yea so what,” I said impatiently.
“Well I was wondering if you wanted to be in my little gang and hang with us and if you do we won't bully you plus you won't ever be bullied ever again. So whatcha say bucko.”
Mark lets go of me and makes me face his gang as he tells me all of his friends names. He pointed to the tall one that grabbed me earlier, this is Wade he's the main target of our jokes.” He points to a slightly shorter chubbier version of Wade but instead of brown hair he has purple hair.”this one is Bob he's kinda the so called player of the group.” I give a little chuckle when Mark says this. He then points next to Bob at the guy with white dyed hair and says,” his name is Matthias he's the smooth talker of the group he mainly gets the group out of trouble if we were blamed for something or if we were caught doing something bad.” I nodded towards Matthias to let Mark know I was paying attention to what he was saying. “ then there's felix he's the flirtations one of the group.”
  “Wait there's still you.” I said with curiosity in my voice.
“Ahh that's right well I'm Mark and I'm the leader/roughest person in the school.”
I snicker at the words he said then I said,” sorry but no I want to be friends with people that would actually care for me and be nice to me so kindly screw off good bye I need to go so my mom doesn't worry about me and plus I don't care what you do to me now I never have and I never will, I don't just want to be friends with someone just to stop them from bullying me.” I then turn and head for the door again but this time Mark grabbed me and pulled me close to him so he could whisper to me in a deep hushed voice saying,” you will regret not taking my offer when you had the chance you little Irish pipsqueak.”
“Whatever you don't scare me ye fake tough guy wannabe.” I said with annoyance in my voice. Then he let me go and I went and found my mom then we headed home for the rest of the day. After dinner I said goodnight to my mom and went upstairs to go to bed. I didn't go to sleep until 12:30 am because the only thing I could think about was what Mark said. Then soon enough I was wrapped up in total blackness as I started to dream.



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