Forbidden

March 15, 2012
By Ms.PeytonLovesHP GOLD, Rancho Cordova, California
Ms.PeytonLovesHP GOLD, Rancho Cordova, California
18 articles 0 photos 184 comments

Favorite Quote:
“We are all a little weird and life is a little weird, and when we find someone whose weirdness is compatible with ours, we join up with them and fall in mutual weirdness and call it love.” - Doctor Seuss


Summary:

Jennifer Lacer is a Forbidden. She is an outcast. A fugitive. And she is all alone. Her parents are dead. Her brother is missing. And she will stop at nothing to get her revenge. After all, she is only sixteen.


Peyton C.

Forbidden


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This book has 11 comments.


MichaelM161 said...
on Apr. 3 at 8:23 am
MichaelM161, Livermore, Maine
0 articles 0 photos 1 comment
I found this to be an excellent read. I was sad though, when Jasper had to die. Keep up the good work.

talhaak GOLD said...
on Apr. 12 2014 at 6:46 am
talhaak GOLD, Lahore, Other
13 articles 0 photos 9 comments

Favorite Quote:
“There is no greater agony than bearing an untold story inside you.” - Maya Angelou

I don't want to sound very critical. I like your story. It's interesting and the concept is nice but there are certain areas where I think the language could be improved. Also, in chapter 2, it seems that you are talking in the present but as the first chapter was referred to in the past, perhaps it would be better to carry on in the same way but I still really like it. I hope this helps!

on Oct. 15 2012 at 4:11 am
Vagabond SILVER, New Delhi, Other
8 articles 0 photos 107 comments

Favorite Quote:
Every end is a new beginning;
What a caterpillar calls an end the rest of the world calls a butterfly;
"Begining are normally sacary endings are normally sad,
it's in the middle which makes life worth living"

amazzzziiinngg!!! Please write more and more!! give me your feedbacks on my book "a new era" Thanks!

on Sep. 21 2012 at 9:23 pm
writer3499 GOLD, New Bedford, Massachusetts
11 articles 0 photos 196 comments

Favorite Quote:
"it's impossible to live without failing at something, unless you live so cautiously that you might has well not have lived at all-in which case you fail by default."
-J.K.Rowling

I would deffinetly read it if you wrote a sequel and I bet alot of other people would too!! If you do end up wrting a sequel I would probably love it but its going to be hard to make the second story as good as this! But i'm sure it will be great....please write more!!

on Sep. 20 2012 at 7:17 pm
Ms.PeytonLovesHP GOLD, Rancho Cordova, California
18 articles 0 photos 184 comments

Favorite Quote:
“We are all a little weird and life is a little weird, and when we find someone whose weirdness is compatible with ours, we join up with them and fall in mutual weirdness and call it love.” - Doctor Seuss

Thank you! I'm so stoked that you loved it. That totally made my day. It's okay that I didn't win; the girl who won defienetly had a better piece. But THANK YOU! I wrote this a LONG time ago, and I was thinking about doing a sequel. What do you think? I don't know....

on Aug. 17 2012 at 9:32 am
writer3499 GOLD, New Bedford, Massachusetts
11 articles 0 photos 196 comments

Favorite Quote:
"it's impossible to live without failing at something, unless you live so cautiously that you might has well not have lived at all-in which case you fail by default."
-J.K.Rowling

WOW this is amazing!!! This is one of the best things I have read on TeenInk! The idea is so creative... your a great writer! I loved every sigle thing about this! I t should have deffinetly won the contest...this is completly fabulous!!!

on May. 29 2012 at 6:21 pm
Kit-Kait BRONZE, Amherst, Virginia
1 article 0 photos 54 comments

I loved this. I actually cried when Jasper was to die... it was so saddening. You carry the reader along with you, make them feel those feelings. I know that so many people love this.

Keep working hard. 5/5


on Apr. 12 2012 at 7:47 pm
Ms.PeytonLovesHP GOLD, Rancho Cordova, California
18 articles 0 photos 184 comments

Favorite Quote:
“We are all a little weird and life is a little weird, and when we find someone whose weirdness is compatible with ours, we join up with them and fall in mutual weirdness and call it love.” - Doctor Seuss

Oh yeah, if your confused on whose answering your question, i changed my name from Peyton C. to HarryPotterLover30 :)

on Apr. 12 2012 at 7:46 pm
Ms.PeytonLovesHP GOLD, Rancho Cordova, California
18 articles 0 photos 184 comments

Favorite Quote:
“We are all a little weird and life is a little weird, and when we find someone whose weirdness is compatible with ours, we join up with them and fall in mutual weirdness and call it love.” - Doctor Seuss

Tnx that you liked it; her parents rebeled against the Council by trying to spread word of the Councils evilness and they tried to go after some leaders, but they got caught, someone ratted them out. Sorry i didn't mention this, but ill try to fix it and put it in. :) Anythging else that I missed?

on Apr. 12 2012 at 1:57 pm
AthenaSilverwolf, Hudson, New Hampshire
0 articles 0 photos 4 comments

Favorite Quote:
"I believe in my mark like initials carved in an old oak tree." Lady Antebellum

thought the book was really good. but now i'm curious; what did her parents do to become forbiddens? Loved it otherwise

on Mar. 23 2012 at 8:06 pm
Ms.PeytonLovesHP GOLD, Rancho Cordova, California
18 articles 0 photos 184 comments

Favorite Quote:
“We are all a little weird and life is a little weird, and when we find someone whose weirdness is compatible with ours, we join up with them and fall in mutual weirdness and call it love.” - Doctor Seuss

Hey, I hope you guys post. I worked really hard on this. I would want some feed back. I wrote this for the hunger games writing contest but i didn't win :( Oh well. please post!


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