Target

March 6, 2011
By Ryter, Warwick, New York
Ryter, Warwick, New York
0 articles 0 photos 49 comments

Favorite Quote:
Yesterday is History, Tomorrow is a Mystery, and Today is a Gift, that is why it is called the Present.


Summary:

Ex-firefighter, Emmit Anderson, woks for the government after the accident. When he is entrusted with top secret government information, he doesn't know what he's getting into. Nobody was supposed to suspect a government desk worker, but they were wrong.


Ryter

Target


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This book has 25 comments.


on Aug. 12 2011 at 8:18 pm
emilybwrites SILVER, Villa Hills, Kentucky
5 articles 0 photos 112 comments

Favorite Quote:
last night i lay in bed, looking up at the stars and i thought to myself, where the heck is the ceiling?

wow this was fantastic great imagery i loved it! please check out my poem "Forgotten Domain" and please comment!!!

Steph0804 said...
on Jul. 21 2011 at 9:58 am
*Sniff* I was hoping that Bernice was gonna kill Vince.

Steph0804 said...
on Jul. 21 2011 at 9:41 am

Hm... if the woman pronounces her w's as v's, shouldn't she pronounce her th's as z's?

By the way, I was hooked from the first page :)


Ryter said...
on Mar. 23 2011 at 9:00 pm
Ryter, Warwick, New York
0 articles 0 photos 49 comments

Favorite Quote:
Yesterday is History, Tomorrow is a Mystery, and Today is a Gift, that is why it is called the Present.

One can dream, or one can work. Depends on how stressed I am at the time. LOL.

on Mar. 23 2011 at 8:57 pm
singingwriter14 BRONZE, Chester, New York
2 articles 0 photos 42 comments

Favorite Quote:
"Some days you're the statue. Some days you're the pigeon."

Well you never know...;-)

Ryter said...
on Mar. 23 2011 at 8:14 pm
Ryter, Warwick, New York
0 articles 0 photos 49 comments

Favorite Quote:
Yesterday is History, Tomorrow is a Mystery, and Today is a Gift, that is why it is called the Present.

Thanks! Actually, everything I write, I see as a movie, hence my inspiration: real actors/actresses! I plan one day for one of my stories to be made into a movie! But we all know I've got 1/1000000000000000 (i dont even know how many zeros I just put...) chance of that ever happening. I guess I just have to meet the right people. :/

on Mar. 23 2011 at 11:16 am
singingwriter14 BRONZE, Chester, New York
2 articles 0 photos 42 comments

Favorite Quote:
"Some days you're the statue. Some days you're the pigeon."

Wow. I am so glad you added more to it. This is so good! Keep going. I need to know more! This would make an awesome movie. I like the suspense with Emmit. I mean, they didn't say he was dead, right? I am so pumped to read more! Go Ryter! :-D

on Mar. 17 2011 at 3:29 pm
Basketball23 SILVER, Pine Grove, Pennsylvania
8 articles 13 photos 488 comments

Favorite Quote:
"I'm living in a shell with no soul" -Three Days Grace (World So Cold)
"Time still turns the pages of the book it's burned" -Avenged Sevenfold (So Far Away)

Haha well I lvoe everything about it!!!  I can't wait to read more!!!

Ryter said...
on Mar. 17 2011 at 3:24 pm
Ryter, Warwick, New York
0 articles 0 photos 49 comments

Favorite Quote:
Yesterday is History, Tomorrow is a Mystery, and Today is a Gift, that is why it is called the Present.

I know! xD

on Mar. 17 2011 at 3:17 pm
Basketball23 SILVER, Pine Grove, Pennsylvania
8 articles 13 photos 488 comments

Favorite Quote:
"I'm living in a shell with no soul" -Three Days Grace (World So Cold)
"Time still turns the pages of the book it's burned" -Avenged Sevenfold (So Far Away)

You're so evil!!!!

Ryter said...
on Mar. 17 2011 at 3:14 pm
Ryter, Warwick, New York
0 articles 0 photos 49 comments

Favorite Quote:
Yesterday is History, Tomorrow is a Mystery, and Today is a Gift, that is why it is called the Present.

I don't know >:)

on Mar. 17 2011 at 3:12 pm
Basketball23 SILVER, Pine Grove, Pennsylvania
8 articles 13 photos 488 comments

Favorite Quote:
"I'm living in a shell with no soul" -Three Days Grace (World So Cold)
"Time still turns the pages of the book it's burned" -Avenged Sevenfold (So Far Away)

Oh my goodness!!!  Now I'm confused...is he dead or isn't he?!?!?!?!

Ryter said...
on Mar. 16 2011 at 7:19 pm
Ryter, Warwick, New York
0 articles 0 photos 49 comments

Favorite Quote:
Yesterday is History, Tomorrow is a Mystery, and Today is a Gift, that is why it is called the Present.

How do you know he's dead? Did you read my little side comment? >:)

on Mar. 16 2011 at 3:16 pm
Basketball23 SILVER, Pine Grove, Pennsylvania
8 articles 13 photos 488 comments

Favorite Quote:
"I'm living in a shell with no soul" -Three Days Grace (World So Cold)
"Time still turns the pages of the book it's burned" -Avenged Sevenfold (So Far Away)

OH MY GOSH!!!!  I don't have a single thing to criticize about this.  Target is most definitely the BEST story I've every read.  GREAT JOB!!!  This is absolutely amazing!!!!  I love everything about this.  It must be so hard for Bernice to kill Emmit...awwww :`( It's so sad and emotional and everything.  This is fantastic!!!  I can't wait to hear the rest!!!!

Ryter said...
on Mar. 12 2011 at 8:56 am
Ryter, Warwick, New York
0 articles 0 photos 49 comments

Favorite Quote:
Yesterday is History, Tomorrow is a Mystery, and Today is a Gift, that is why it is called the Present.

Haha, yeea. Well, you never know what may happen :)

on Mar. 12 2011 at 8:49 am
Internal-Love PLATINUM, Queens, New York
33 articles 3 photos 311 comments

Favorite Quote:
Nothing's black or white, its all just a shade of gray---

















TI "Live your Life" ft Rihanna

yes, i knew Bernice was a Russian spy :) It reminds me of the movie Salt!

And thanks, that really clears it up!!

Now i kinda feel bad for the guy with the package. All because it was given to him, he's gotta be killed!


Ryter said...
on Mar. 11 2011 at 9:33 pm
Ryter, Warwick, New York
0 articles 0 photos 49 comments

Favorite Quote:
Yesterday is History, Tomorrow is a Mystery, and Today is a Gift, that is why it is called the Present.

Urg! I can never get one thought onto one post! Bernice is a Russian spy/trained killer. I thought I made that clear, but I guess I'll have to make it a little more clear. The disks are US government secrets, and she is collecting them for her government's use. I know in real life, we are like allies (sp?) with Russia or something to that effect, but I'm also not sure when this takes place, but it doesn't matter really. This is basically a first draft and I'll have to fix some things up (obviously) and it's hopefully going to be better. 

Ryter said...
on Mar. 11 2011 at 9:25 pm
Ryter, Warwick, New York
0 articles 0 photos 49 comments

Favorite Quote:
Yesterday is History, Tomorrow is a Mystery, and Today is a Gift, that is why it is called the Present.

By the way: The disks are government secrets

Ryter said...
on Mar. 11 2011 at 9:05 pm
Ryter, Warwick, New York
0 articles 0 photos 49 comments

Favorite Quote:
Yesterday is History, Tomorrow is a Mystery, and Today is a Gift, that is why it is called the Present.

Let me just say, they are not going to run away together. >:) does that put you back to the first square of figuring out what's going to happen?

on Mar. 11 2011 at 8:43 pm
Internal-Love PLATINUM, Queens, New York
33 articles 3 photos 311 comments

Favorite Quote:
Nothing's black or white, its all just a shade of gray---

















TI "Live your Life" ft Rihanna

Like charmiypiggy said, the story DID go a little faster then what i was used to, but i really enjoyed reading it!! There are SOME things you could fix, like in the flashback, you could make the flashback one lone paragraph. Even though i could tell it was a flashback (and an interesting one at that) you could use past tenses and stuff like that, to really set the scene...........But eventually i did get caught up in the story and the adventure and the romance.

But why was Bernice collecting disks? And for her country? what's going on? Maybe I'll find out in future chapters..........but that was one part i didn't get.

Champaign hair, and killing a man she loves.............now that's a different kind of story. i was shocked when her supposed 'lover' Vince put a gun to her head. That was pretty intense. i like intense :)

This was a creative story and a nice read :) i liked it alot

And do keep on going!! I'm in suspense though i have a pretty good idea of whats gonna happen............:D



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