Sexy Hate | Teen Ink

Sexy Hate

November 17, 2017
By Cwyn8 PLATINUM, Seattle, Washington
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Cwyn8 PLATINUM, Seattle, Washington
20 articles 0 photos 0 comments

Author's note:

I am writing about a female villain who isn't evil becasue of a man breaking her heart, but because of a mixture of other reasons that will have you turning pages as fast as you can, as you can relate to each troublesome topic. 

Screaming wildly, I run at the man, hitting him solidly in the side with my sword. Giving an exaggerated grunt, the man falls to the ground, making us both laugh.
“Papa!” I laugh, “Will I at least leave a bruise?” I’ve been training for combat in the past week. It’s my favourite game to play with my father.
“Oh yeah, it’ll be a big one for such a little girl like you, Lyra,” he replies.
Smiling with pride, I turn away from my father, looking out at our farmland. I’d grown up here. My father never lets me leave alone, despite my constant pleading. Supposedly, father had built it all himself, in a purposefully secluded area. It’s quite beautiful.
A scream from my father breaks me from my daze, “Lyra! Run!” I turn to see my father’s look of fear as something silver protrudes from his chest, making him choke and spill blood from his mouth.
Tears welling in my eyes, I turn and run into the woods surrounding our farm.
My father had once said, “Lyra, if I ever tell you to run, you run as fast and far as you possibly can, and once you can’t run anymore, you hide. Hide well. There are people in this world who want us dead, so if anything happens to me, go to this address.” He’d written an address down and made me memorize it before shredding the paper he’d written it on. “Don’t ever tell anyone that address. It’s incredibly dangerous.”
“Yes daddy,” I’d never questioned him until now, as I’m running through the woods, alone, knowing that my father is dead.

“Lyra,” a voice startles me awake, “wake up, it’s time for practice,” my best friend Jace whispers, trying not to wake my roommate.
Nodding, I roll out of bed, pulling on pants. I turn away from Jace in order to put on a bra and day shirt, but I can feel his eyes on my bare back.
Since the day I arrived here at age 8, he and I have been inseparable.
“Let’s go,” I growl, walking briskly from the room. I’m not a morning person. It’s early enough that it’s still dark, and with every breath we take, the exhale is visible in the air.
I walk through the mostly dead grass over to the shed with sparring equipment.
“Hey, you okay? You seem upset,” Jace asks, concern clear in his voice. When I don’t answer, he asks, “The nightmare again?” I nod curtly, tossing a wooden sword at him, signaling that I don’t want to talk. Getting into position, he comes at me and hits before I’m ready, knocking me backwards. The wind knocked out of me, Jace runs forward to help me up. Still trying to get my breath back, he suddenly jerks me forward, planting a very awkward kiss on my lips. I pull back and turn away, blushing.
“Come on, let’s spar,” I say, confident that I’ll beat him.
Both of us getting in position this time, I make the first move, swinging my sword high, expecting him to block. He parries my attack and we dance around, swords colliding. Finally, I land a blow to the side of his face that forces him to call it.
Knowing that I left a nasty bruise, I go check on him, “Are you alright?” he stands up, shaking his head. My heart drops to my stomach. He’s never said no to not being okay before.
“But not because of the hit,” he sighs, sitting down, putting his face in his hands. He begins shaking and I know that he’s crying. I wrap my arms around him, kissing the top of his head as I’ve done a thousand times before to comfort him.
I don’t ask him what’s wrong, I’ve made that mistake before. When he’s ready to talk, he will.
He raises his head, tears still streaming down his face and I really see that he didn’t sleep last night by the bags under his eyes. “My mom.. She.. Ugh!” Jace growls, unable to breathe. He’s always had problems with his mother, but the tears ended years ago. “She kicked… Kicked out Sylv,” He gasps, fresh tears falling onto his lap.
I knew it was going to be bad, but I never expected this. “What? Why?” I ask, bewildered.
“It’s my fault… I… I convinced Sylvileitin to sneak out with me the night I got into the dorm. Our mom caught us coming back and Sylv took the blame. I… I tried to say they were covering for me, but mom told me to stop always trying to cover for Sylv. It wasn’t until this morning, when Sylv showed up here that I knew.”
Trying to take everything in, I look down at the ground. “Wow, Jace… I am so sorry…”
“I just… don’t know where they can go. My dorm is so full,” he sighs, wiping his face with his hands.
“Oh, well I’ll let them stay with me. I have an extra bed and Lylz won’t mind.”
Looking tired and defeated, he glances at me. “Could you? I didn’t want to ask…”
I nod instantly, wrapping my arms around him, sitting there for a minute. “Come on, let’s go to the breakfast hall,” I whisper. Surprised, Jace looks up at the unusual request. I hate breakfast and he usually joins me to spar instead, despite his need for nutrition. “You could use the company of the crowd, plus, you need to eat.” He has a bad habit of not eating when he’s stressed.
We stand and walk to the hall in silence. Walking in, the room makes me catch my breath, as it does every time. Long tables covered in food line all the walls. Tables that seat up to ten people fill the middle of the room. The lights are artificial stars on the ceiling, giving off a gentle blueish glow.
“Come on,” Jace says, leading me to the nearest food table, immediately filling his plate.
The tables hold every food you’d dream of, sweet, savory, salty, sour, bitter, you could find any flavour. Though I don’t eat breakfast, the drink table holds a variety of at least ten different juices, but I go straight for my favourite, pineapple raspberry yogurt smoothie. The Woman had added it to the menu when I moved here and refused to eat anything else.
The Woman is the leader or mother of our small town. Unlike leaders around the world, The Woman mingles with us. She eats with us, spars, and sleeps in the same dorms. Really, the only way in which she is different is her face. She’s ageless. I’ve asked Jace how old she was, but his response was a terrified,
“Don’t ever ask that again.”
Though weird, I didn’t think much of his response.
Turning, I scan the room for Lylz. I spot her at a table by the door, talking with The Woman.
I walk over and as I do, they get quiet, obviously changing the topic.
“Greetings, Lyra,” The Woman smiles at me. I sit next to Lylz, not saying anything. Jace joins us, taking one look at me and squeezing my knee in comfort.
“So, how is everyone?” The Woman asks, distractedly.
“Fine,” we all mumble, beginning to eat.
“Alright, well I’ve got some things to do. You kids have fun,” she says, exiting the room, briefly glancing at Lylz and I before doing so.
Turning to Lylz, “what was that about?” I ask.
Looking down, she pretends to eat, but whispers, “Come with me after we eat,” then proceeds to eat in silence.

“Follow me,” Lylz demands, walking off. “Jace, you can only come if Lyra wants you there,” she adds, increasing her pace to a brisk walk. I nod, trying to keep up with my roommate.
“Where are we going?” I ask, impatient with all the walking. Lylz ignores me and continues to walk.
It wasn’t until we had been walking for what had felt like an hour, that she stopped. We are in a forresty area surrounded by fog. “What are we doing here?” I ask, confused.
“We are here so she can’t hear us. This is the only area in the entire village that there aren’t any devices to monitor us, and that’s just cause it’s always foggy here, due to the swamp.”
“Okay, but why do we need to be in private?” I ask, bewildered at the news.
“Because,” she sighs, “You need to see this,” she pulls out a piece of paper and hands it over to me. Instead of the paper I thought she’d had, it is a photo. More like a series of photos on one photo sheet.
“What is this..?” I ask, tears filling my eyes. “Please tell me this isn’t what I think it is. Where did you get this?” The sheet is filled with dozens of photos of my father and I working on our farm, playing without sparring equipment, making food, and enjoying our time together.
“That is precisely why we needed to come out here,” Lylz sighs, “I got it from The Woman. My parents were working with her to take your father down.. I don’t know how you got here, but The Woman is keeping it from you so you don’t turn on us.”
Dazed, I stand there for a long moment. Suddenly, I’m opening my eyes as Jace yells my name, “Lyra, are you okay? What happened?”
“I’m fine,” I growl, sitting up. “How long have you known?” I snarl at Lylz.
Backing away with fear in her eyes, “I swear I just found out for sure at breakfast. I would never keep something like this from you. I swear. Please, Lyra, you have to believe me,” she’s crying as she begs for my forgiveness.
Looking down, my heart breaks. My father would be alive if it weren’t for her parents. They killed the only family I had ever known.
“Okay, I’m sorry,” I say, tears still streaming down my face. “I’m keeping this.”
“No offence, Lyra, but how are you not freaking out on Lylz?” Jace asks, turning to me with frustration in his eyes. “She just told you that her own parents killed the only one you have. She gets to keep both of hers, and they took you only support away, and somehow they are letting you live here oblivious.”
“Jace, this isn’t her fault. She didn’t know. It was her parents, not her. She was just ten when it happened. Why should I hate her?” I say, confused at his anger. He’s never been an angry person.
“She could have known. You were on your own at ten, you know what someone is capable of,” he yells.
“Stop it, Jace! I trust her, she didn’t know,” I scream back, glaring at him for the assumption that one of my best friends could be responsible for murdering my father.
“Fine,” he sighs, turning and walking off. I don’t know if he knows the area, but I hope, under all of my anger, that he doesn’t get lost.
“He loves you,” Lylz says, turning away, seemingly sad. “That much is obvious.”
I don’t say anything back because I don’t know exactly how to respond. Suddenly, “Why are you sad about that?” I ask, genuinely curious.
She turns, looking me in the eyes, her face still covered in tears. Her brilliant blue eyes still full of tears. Her long black hair covers about half of her face, but I’ve memorized her features perfectly. She’s wearing a beautiful dress that’s black with blue flowers that match her eyes perfectly. “Is it that hard to tell?” She asks, sighing.
“What? I’m confused,” I respond, trying to figure out what she could be talking about.
“Lyra… I’m in love with you. I always have been,” Lylz turns away again. “That’s why I could never betray you like that.”
“Oh,” I wish I was better prepared for this. My brown hair is in a curly, tangled mess. I’m in sweats and a tank top, my bra showing through. Now I realize why she’s dressed so nicely.
“I had planned for this day to go very differently. I didn’t want to present you with this news in the middle of you finding out that our people did... What they did.”
I sigh, not sure what to say to that part. “I like you. I’m not sure if it’s love, but I like you. I always have,” I respond, trying not to guard my feelings like I always do. It’s wrong, to these people, to be lesbian. Even so, I keep telling myself that I’m not gay, but I can’t help how my heart feels. I’ve never been attracted to a guy, which is why it was so awkward for Jace, my best friend, to kiss me this morning.
“Would you ever.. Go on a date with me?” She asks shyly, still not looking up at me.
“Yes. But I have to figure out what to do about me being here first. About how to handle this new information. I’ve made it my mission to find the people who killed my father, but I didn’t think it would be the people I’ve come to trust. That aside, why would my father tell me to come here if the people out to get us are here? It doesn’t make any sense.”
“I can help with that. I have always trusted my parents, but given the recent news, that’s not the case anymore. I can look around the house, I do know where they generally keep their things hidden.
“About your dad telling you to come here, we haven’t been here long. We had just arrived when you came to us. Before us, it was another group of people that The Woman didn’t like much. She said that them leaving was peaceful, though. I guess she’s not so trustworthy either.”
Nodding, I turn to look around. We are surrounded by trees and bushes. It’s beautiful in a rugged kind of way. In the center of the clearing we are standing in, is a rock big enough for multiple to sit on comfortably. I walk over to it, to examine what looks like paint on it. As I get closer, I realize it’s not paint, but carvings. What’s even more surprising is that it’s writing and drawings of me. The art is insanely good for being carved into stone. Turning around, I say,
“Okay, let’s go back. We can’t be gone too long or they’ll realize something happened. I don’t want to make it obvious that I know until I have a plan,” I state, trying to work out a plan in my head, but I just keep seeing the images of me carved into the rock. I know that it was Lylz that did them, but I didn’t know she had that kind of skill, and it’s insanely romantic for her. I always thought she was too stony to be a gushy romantic.
As we walk, again in silence, I think about what a date would be like. I’ve known Lylz for almost the entire time I’ve been here, but I never thought she was into girls. I guess that shows how little I truly know about her. She generally spends a lot of time running and working out, but she’s a strange individual. She only uses things she finds in nature to work out, instead of supporting the weight making companies, because apparently they kill a lot of the ecosystem making their products. For instance, one time when a storm blew over a tree, she used a large branch to do her squats and bench press. I’ve always thought that was an interesting aspect of her personality. She cares about everything nature related, even humans, who often hurt nature.
I’ve seen her plans to build her own cabin, but only from trees and such that have already died. I love how green she is, even though it can be quite frustrating sometimes.
“Do you want to just go hang in our dorm?” I ask, wanting to talk more about us.
Nodding, she follows close behind me. Leaning forward, very close, “There are mics in our dorm, so be careful what you say. I don’t care if they know about us, but you don’t want them to know about what we talked about today. That will end badly.”

Love
I unlock our dorm as we finally reach it. Our room is small, just a single room with an attached kitchen and a bathroom on the far wall with a pocket door that we painted to look like an aquarium. It’s relatively clean, despite our blankets strewn everywhere. I try to make my bed, but often times I don’t, in my hurry to get outside to spar. The third bed in the room is naked, seeing as how no one ever uses it, since only two of us live here. I go to the linen closet by the pocket bathroom to grab sheets so Sylv could sleep here tonight.
“You’re okay with Sylv staying here, right?” I ask, making the small bed.
“Yeah, that’s fine,” Lylz sighs, falling onto her bed, exhausted.
“So, you want to go on a date. Where would you take me on this phantom date?” I ask, blushing. I never thought I’d be able to tell her that I wanted to go out with her at some point as more than friends.
“I don’t really know. I’ve never dated before. It’s not like there are a lot of girls here that are as unique as you. Or girls that are even slightly gay, cause, you know… That’s illegal here.. The Woman would have our heads if we were open out in public, but she’s always known about me. She just told me to keep it to myself, and don’t tell anyone. For being as screwed up as she is, she really does care.”
Snorting, I retort with, “Right, she obviously cares. She had my dad murdered. So much love right there.” I realize a second too late what I just said. “Oh s***, she’s going to hear that.. Well, I guess I’ll have to deal with the consequences… Unless… Unless I leave.”
Lylz just stares at me for a minute, shock plain on her face. “You’re kidding right?”



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