Why do I even care anymore, it's not like he does. Not like he tries, or even acknowledges me anymore. I say "hey" and get a glare. I ask what I did, get no response. He tells me he's not mad at me, but he talks and laughs with everyone else. Why can't he with me? We used to, he used to ALWAYS be there for me, he never is anymore. I know he said he gave up that life, the reason we were so close, that doesn't mean he can't talk to me. I've changed too, yes I will always see him like that, but I don't see just that. I see someone who used to stand up for me and care about me. He couldn't care less anymore, I'm just something he wants to forget. To erase. I always will be. They always try to forget me, even though I stand up for them still, try to be there still. He used to say he knew the feeling, apparently not, or he wouldn't do this to me anymore. I always feel like he resents me, that he hates me because he feels like I caused it. But I'll never know, only time we talk is if he needs advice or he's alone. I wanna give up but I can't, not yet. There's still one more blow he can give to make me leave. I don't hate him. I never will. I'm too much like my grandfather. There's too much love and forgiveness in me.