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A LETTER TO REMEMBER....

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Carla heaved a sigh. She had to do it. She couldn’t go on like this anymore. Writing was the only thing that made her free of her overbearing emotions. She opened her notebook, flipped to the centre page and tore it off. Then she took a blue ball point pen.

“Fine then. Let’s get this done!” she muttered and began writing swiftly. The words were coming to her naturally. Earlier when she had thought about writing this letter, she had thought that it’d be the toughest of all that she’d written previously. But looked like she was wrong. All the emotions of revenge, betrayal, ecstasy and regret were pouring down from her pen onto the paper like Niagara Falls…

ABC City
XYZ Lane
Belgium
17th February, 2013
Dear Jason,
Hope your girlfriend lets this letter reach to you as it is.
This is the first time that I’m making any conversation with you directly. Probably the last time too. The reasons for writing this letter are purely selfish- I wanted to get rid of my burdening emotion, plus, I was a bit excited about receiving a reply from YOU. It has been 15 months since we came to know of each other’s existence- a rise in position was seen. From a speck of dust, we had risen to live human beings in each other’s eyes. I can bet all my stock of chocolates on it that you know the names and whereabouts of most of my friends. Don’t be embarrassed. I know of yours too. Frankly, it was quite a thrill to see you outside school, when I’d be returning from my tuitions. I’d drive my friends crazy by repeatedly demanding your presence at that spot. Lunatic, I know right? I had a few sources to get your phone number but I didn’t go for any. What would have happened if I did have your number? Obviously, I don’t have the guts to call you or text you. So, having your number just for the sake of it didn’t go down well with me. Though quoted as very evil, a huge flirt and a Casanova, you proved to be very shy when it came down to approaching me. All those sly glances, deliberate steps to show off your athletic and sporty skills during our Games period together, the smirks and sniggers of your mates- did you think I didn’t notice all that? At one point of time, all of it did seem cute but now I feel repulsive when I remember those old times. You showed yourself to be very brave and smart. If that was true, then why didn’t you have the guts to wish me on my birthday? I know you knew about it. You were right there in the canteen when I was giving a treat to my friends. I was aware of your darting eyes. Yes, I was.
The major blunder that you committed was of refusing my friends of having any knowledge about a girl named Carla. Is it true, sweetheart? You don’t know any Carla? Did you ever think just how much this simple statement of yours could hurt me? Much more than what my friends did by approaching you and talking to you about me? No, ofcourse not. Guess that’s why they call you evil. Then whatever your girlfriend said to me, I replied to it with all politeness because I’m not ‘evil’. Ahh. You knew how much I cried that day. You knew how scared I was. You knew it all! Still it took you 10 days to apologize? You couldn’t even do that face to face! Virtual sorries don’t have any value, my dear!
After all of this melodrama, I still blush when you come around. Even though I abuse you in front of my friends, I quietly curse myself for doing that. I still keep a tab on you-I’m well-informed about your whereabouts these days. My friends still nudge me during recess when you pass by. And most of all, I still start doing crazy and stupid things when I get aware that you’re watching.
Whatever happened with me during my high-school year, I think THIS would be called a milestone- something which would come to me accompanied by a sigh from my lips, a flutter of my eyes, a shake of my head, biting of lips, and the rundown of an uneasy feeling in my body. If all these actions don’t accompany this memory of mine, only then will I be convinced that I have truly forgotten you. Only then will I be able to behave normally with you. Only and only then, (on ignoring all your vices, your somewhat sour reputation and your hostile and highly annoying girlfriend) will I be able to toy with the idea of becoming your friend. And this time, I’ll be the one initiating it, I’ll be the one approaching you and I’ll be the one who’ll get you rid of all your vices, bad reputation and, if possible, your girlfriend too. Lol. :D
Carla

She ended the letter with a triumphant look on her face. With great dignity, she stood up and went out of her house, towards the letter-box. There it was- the blue, rusted box of letters. She went towards it slowly. As soon as she was a step away from it, she stopped abruptly and stared at the letter-box. Even though blue was her favourite colour, she wasn’t liking the sight of this blue-hued-huge-box. She closed her eyes. After a minute or so, she opened them. They had gathered a hypnotizing glare. With great determination, she crumpled the envelope containing the letter and threw it into a nearby dustbin.

Treading the road back home, she muttered, “Oh well, maybe some other time. The letter-box was rather full anyways…”

Now, isn’t THIS a case of ‘sour grapes’, eh?



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