Walk by Faith

January 21, 2013
“Who want’s to go first?”
That aching inside me tells me to push myself, overpowering my fear and self-doubt, just long enough for me to raise my hand, instantly making me the unsaid leader of my gym class. What did I just do? I can’t do this.

But there’s no way that I would allow that fear to reverse the feeling of thrill I got just from climbing the first few steps. I have to do this. I can do this.
Most people think I’m not much of a risk taker. Maybe they’re right--but maybe not. Step by step, I realize that being a risk taker isn’t needed, but walking by faith is.

I feel my legs losing stability beneath me and I can finally empathize with those who have felt their heart beating straight out of their chest. I’m at the top of this 20 foot ladder. Now I stare at my next obstacle. The plank. The cheers of my classmates fade out, and I’m left alone with my thoughts. This harness isn’t tight enough. What if I take the wrong step and the harness fails and I die? My teacher’s encouragement must have snapped me out of my daydreaming.
“Olivia, you’ve got this! You can do it.”
You can do it. These four words echo through my mind. After wrestling with my thoughts, I’m forced to face my lack of faith.
If I was focused on the five steps ahead of the one that I haven’t even taken, I will fall. I see nothing. I have no idea where I’m going or what my next step will be. I’d be lying to say that I’m not scared. But the more I walk by this amazing faith, the more I realize there’s no need to worry. The more I realize over time, God has made me a leader and expects me to use that gift even when I feel like I can’t do it.
The truth is, I can’t do it solely on my own. But I can, when I walk by faith. Not knowing what I’m doing with the rest of my life, or how my life will change, or what my next step might be, is a lot easier knowing that I’ve got a great God guiding every step I take. I put the blindfold on, and have no choice but to walk not by sight but by faith, and faith alone.

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