What Could Have Been

All those years, I thought you were crazy. I always told myself you were lying, telling me only what I wanted to hear. But I didn't want to hear it. I knew what you were, and what you did. You were a player, so I ran away from you, even though you told me countless times how badly you wanted me. And no matter how many other guys threw themselves at me, you were the only one I ever thought about. I didn't know why you were stuck in my head, and I didn't want you to be. I never wanted to let all those feelings I was trying so hard to compress, to take me over. Sometimes, I just wanted to give in to all the tempting feelings. And for a while I even considered taking you on, but I struck that idea down quickly. I often thought to myself, that you were extremely out of my league, that I wasn't like the other girls you have dated, and not in a good way. I never knew why you even bothered flirting with me. I wasn't drop dead gorgeous, I didn't have a nice body, even though you told me I had all those things. I even told you how I felt about my appearence and you told me I was beautiful. But, I just couldn't believe you. I will never know why.
And now, I'm starting to think how good of a relationship we could have had. We were great friends, but not like brother and sister, and we'd known each other for about 5 or 6 years, so of course we had good communication. And really, thats what a relationship is, communication. I told him everything and he told me eveything. He even rode my bus, so he lived right down the road! I'm starting to believe I made a mistake by not taking you seriously.
I'll never forget the time you told me, when we were riding home one day, and though you had a girlfriend, your goal before you died was to date me. And another time when it was raining you asked me if you got off the bus with me if I would kiss you in the rain. I just laughed and said whatever, but you were dead serious. I never stopped thinking about it.
I always told you, how much of a player you were. At first you denied the very idea. But when I started to tell you all the things you've done, I think you realized and changed your ways. Because ever since then, you've been with that same girl. So, natrually, I've come to regret doing that. But then you started getting in trouble, and I never really saw you anymore, and we stopped talking as much. Thats when I really began thinking about the numerous times you put your hands on me, and told me how soft I was, or when you got close to me, and told me I smelled good. I'll never forget how good your hands felt, how right it felt.
But now its too late, you had to leave, and you'll be gone for 3 months. You probably won't even remember me. And, I think you really love her. Not like the other times you said that about girls, this time you really mean it. And shes beautiful, everything you deserve.
Well, its time to admit to my mistakes. It's time to say good bye, and thank you.





Join the Discussion

This article has 1 comment. Post your own now!

TheWordSmith said...
Oct. 8, 2011 at 1:59 pm

The first thing I would suggest is spacing - readers often glance at a story/article/poem & decide, "I can handle that; I'll read it," or, "That looks like too much to read - I'll just read something else." Spacing encourages more people to read what you write. :)

I think that this definitely has great potential; I would just refine it a bit. The main thing I would work on is the ending - this piece had the potential for one of those really memorable endings that sticks with the re... (more »)

 
bRealTime banner ad on the left side
Site Feedback