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And The Truth is One Day We Will All Run Out Of Time

We all wish our lives away waiting for things to happen: a vacation, a day off. All I’m going to wish for from this day forward is time. More time to be with the ones I love. None of us know how much time we have on this earth but all I know is right now I’m going to make the best of the time I have left. I love my family more than anything in this world.

And now I am coming to the biggest obstacle on this earth for me. My grandma is slowly losing it. Right now we have to take her to get a cat scan on her leg because she has full blockages and they don’t know if they need to do bypasses on it. And she’s also facing dementia. I hate to admit it but the dementia is winning. She is fading. It’s not exactly subtle but day by day you can tell big things are changing and you better enjoy her know because tomorrow when you wake up she won’t be the same person. She is moody and stubborn. She is easily confused but there is no way in hell I will ever forget this lady. I don’t know how much time I have left with her and I don’t care. I just wish there was a way I could have more time. Even a day, an hour, a minute, a memory. I just want more time to remember her and it hurts because her time is coming all too soon. I’m 15 and 15 is too young to tell a child that they need to be strong. It’s too hard to be that strong when the most important thing in your life is crumbling in around you. I have had a better relationship with my grandma than most people find in a lifetime. I can talk to her for hours about anything, but she isn’t the same person she was a year ago. Time changes things. Subtlety she is becoming a very different person and she is one I have not known before. Time heals all scars but sometimes time creates new wounds. There isn’t enough time in a person’s life to do everything you want to do. But there is enough time to find a person that you will love no matter what. My grandma has changed me into an amazing person and time cannot change the person she is to me. With dementia, time makes it harder to remember the things you thought you would never forget. But time is a great teacher. Time teaches you that if it happens once it could happen again. Time teaches you to love truly and when times get hard, they will get better someday. But there will never be enough time to satisfy everyone. Time is a calculation of all the blood, sweat, tears, and hardships a person goes through. All I know is one day we will all run out of time to be with the ones we love and to be on this earth. And I also know that one day if you waste time now, one day, and I don’t know when, you will regret it. About a year ago I lost my grandpa to Parkinson’s and dementia and by the end he didn’t remember my name until the very last time I saw him. And at his funeral I cried because I had so many opportunities to tell my dad, “let’s get in the car and go see him.” I regretted not taking those opportunities. I regretted not trying to spend more time with him. Time ran out. So now that I am facing the same obstacles with my grandma, all I know is time will always run out so make the most of what you have; whether that is a day, an hour, a minute, a second, a memory. It will all run out. I've been burnt, beat, and set on fire; nothing can stop me now.Don’t wait for tomorrow to come because one day you will look back and see all of the today’s you wasted.



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