Dearest

October 7, 2009
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Baby,



I miss you, I do. I don’t know how I can miss someone constantly in my thoughts. I miss the way you held me and pushed sadness out of reach. I miss walking on the beach. The way we would sit in the sands, the feel of your hands on me. There are some memories that never leave. I know that we can not change the past and that we can not predict the future. In the past I loved you, in the present I love you, and in the future I see myself loving you. For you opened my eyes to how love should feel and never again will I settle for less.
In this time of our lives, we are surrounded by possibilities and choice, which in the past have come between us, but isn’t it possible that they could also eventually bring us together? With both of us being better people for the time we spent apart. It kills me that right now we can’t be together. Sometimes pride and fear get in the way of expressing true emotion. I feel a deep guilt in my heart for ever hurting you by enabling to see my feelings. I’m telling you now that there is no need to cry, because when you’re feeling alone so am I. I curse the stars for making us feel so distant and alone. Yet at the same time I take comfort in knowing that you feel the same as I do. .
“Sometimes we tend to be in despair when the person we love leaves us, but the truth is, it’s not our loss, but theirs, for they left the only person who wouldn’t give up on them.” You gave up. As I sit here writing I know that I still have yet to do the same. I knew that I couldn’t change your mind, but most importantly that I couldn’t change your heart. Time has gone by and we’ve both changed.


I make no expectations from you. We are who we are. I wait for nothing in return, and will content myself with unrequited love.


With love,


Ashley





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