Once again, I'm in Barnes and Noble and about to commence studying for finals because they launch next week.  I'm currently sitting in the familiar and humble little cafe and immersing myself in my fantasy music playlist on my iPod.  It never ceases to awaken my inner spirit and take me to another planet.  This, combined with the lovely aroma of toasty warm coffee, makes for a sense-stimulating environment.  It helps my creativity flow through my writing and I end up reaching a somewhat euphoric trance due to the stimulation of the multiple senses.  It makes my inner spirit smile and puts me in a place of tranquility.  This magnificent spiritual experience at this bookstore today sharply contrasts with my visit the prior week.  I remeber enduring another gruesome panic attack that quickly tightened its peremptory grip on me and stole my mind from reality, and not in the pleasant fashion like the former.  My mind was racing, like complex Celtic music, and simultaneously, a growing crowd of people chattered continuously around me.  It was an internal, mental explosion.  I couldn't pinpoint a single idea or distinguish one single thought from another.  It was agonizing, all of my stresses were attacking me synchronously.  I felt out-of-body, like a spirit watching the world go by in slow motion, suffering in silence.  At this point, I thoroughly believed that it was irrefutable to escape immediately or death would follow suit.  It was as if the devil sat there with his chin up torturing my helpless being, controlling me like a puppet, and watching my misery with an evil smirk.  The physical effects were unbearable: My heart beating furiously, at the tempo of a hummingbird's, the hot, sticky sweat gluing to my skin, the uncontrollable shaking and trembling, the nauseating dizziness, my muscles becoming bricks and feeling immobile, the hyperventilating leading to near unconsciousness, the chest tightening as if an elephant were crushing it...the impending sense of doom.  My entire body ached in a million different ways, proving it exasperating.  On top of it all, I fought courageously to keep silent, due to it being in a public location.  The fierce horror of a panic attack simply cannot be expressed to the fullest extent utilizing the English language.  It fails to do it justice...I strongly believe that one must experience a panic attack themselves before they can truly understand the degree of power one possesses over the mind, body, and soul.