It’s not like anything happened.

It’s not like you and him turned into anything. You were never a couple… Or even an “item” for that matter.

Just good friends. Good friends is what he called you two. Besties. It was never good enough for you though was it?… Because you still can’t seem to let him go; get him out of your mind. He’s still in there, even when you find another good friend to fill the void; he will always be your one in a million.

Besties.

Was he really that to you? Hell, no. You always knew he was more. Much, much more. Even when you swore you were over him. No matter how hard you tried to forget your feelings, and no matter how many tears rolled down your cheeks, he was always like your oxygen; like your world would come crashing down if he had never existed… Right?

Right.

And you killed yourself. You killed yourself trying to block him out. But everyday you would see his smile, and get sucked right back in. But it felt good. It felt amazing. To be wrapped in his arms. To have him hold you close enough to smell his cologne. It was your heaven wasn’t it?

Did you get that pain in your chest? That feeling of emptiness when he wasn’t around? Like when he left the room he didn’t just take his smile with him, but he took all of you insides with him too? He cleaned you out. Until you were hollow.

But you’re over him now. He’s gone, and you’re starting over.

And still, everytime you let your mind slip back to one of those memories of your first love, the pain comes rushing back.

It hits you like a ton of bricks.