Queen Pins | Teen Ink

Queen Pins

May 22, 2015
By Anonymous

Queen Pins
  When children return to school in September, moms who are not employed outside the home realize something they had forgotten still exists: free time.  Not knowing how to deal with this strange concept, stay-at-home moms may experience boredom.  With her two teenage sons back in school, Mary Johnson encountered this feeling.  She needed an activity to fill the spaces on her empty calendar so that her husband would not make her do the unspeakable: get a job.  After talking with her neighbor, Mary learned about a “really fun and super easy” social activity: a bowling league.   Realizing that this was the perfect way to appear “busy”, Mary could not wait to join.  Finding teammates among the parents of her children’s friends (also stay-at-home moms) was a breeze.  The only challenge: choosing a team name.  Mary, queen of her household, decided upon “Queen Pins” as her team name—not the best name in the league by any means —but a fitting one nonetheless.  With teammates and a team name—the only two requirements—Mary joined a bowling league. 
This will be Mary’s third year participating in this seven-month long league.  Bowling takes place once a week on Thursday mornings at 9:15 A.M. (a time that these housewives have anxiously awaited for six agonizingly long days) from the middle of September to the middle of April.   All teams are required to have three teammates present every Thursday morning; if a teammate does not show up, an automatic ten points are deducted from their weekly score.  Mary’s team understands the importance of showing up each week, as they need every point they can get—though dedicated, Mary and her teammates are by no means professional bowlers, to put it nicely. 
Bowling leagues have had an impact on American’s lives since the sport became largely popular in the late 1940s because of its simultaneously participatory, social, and competitive nature (Berg).  Mary’s team participates in a Women’s League  at the Medina Lanes bowling alley.  There are two different types of bowling leagues: sanctioned and non-sanctioned; the seriousness of the bowling league depends on which category it falls under.  A sanctioned league is one that has to follow the rules of the USBC  exactly, and costs fifteen dollars more than a non-sanctioned league (Smith). According to the National Bowling Council, 6.7 million Americans bowl in a sanctioned league (Haga).  Mary’s league was sanctioned last year, but the league manager wanted to save money (the extra fifteen dollars proved to be too big of an expense), so they are non-sanctioned this year. The bowlers do not mind this change, as it allows them to enjoy a more relaxed bowling environment each week.  Non-sanctioned leagues also give bowlers the opportunity to pre-bowl  if they know a teammate will be absent on a Thursday during the season.  Most bowlers appreciate this flexibility because these housewives are “very busy”  (Johnson).  However, Mary’s teammate, Michelle, does not approve of this rule.  “It is not nearly as fun because you are in an empty alley with your two other teammates.  It takes away from the social and competitive aspect of bowling”, Michelle said.
During regular play, some teams are still intense even though they belong to a non-sanctioned league.  For example, Sue (a fellow league mate) broke her right hand, which prevented her from bowling.  However, the team she was competing against one week made her bowl because they would not allow Sue to submit an averaged score—thus, Sue learned to bowl with her left hand.  According to Michelle, the seriousness of the game depends on the opponent.  Certain teams require their competitor to follow proper bowling etiquette.   With other teams, however, questions like: “Wait, whose son is playing football at Notre Dame next year?” and “Did you see that adorable sweater in the CAbi  catalogue?” take precedence over bowling.  Arguably the most intense teammate, Laurie, claims that bad teams are fun to play against, but her team performs at a higher level when playing a more competitive opponent—always focused on improving her personal best, Laurie prefers to contend with such teams. 

Michael Jackson’s voice resonates throughout the poorly lit building.   Illuminated signs indicate the teams’ designated lanes.  Freshly poured ice water lines the counter.   As women socialize minutes before bowling commences, their bowling balls rest in the automated ball return racks, waiting to be gracefully rolled down the lanes.  Most women don’t put much thought into the ball they choose to bowl with.  Maybe they choose the prettiest one—animal print and bright pink balls are common among the housewives.  Maybe they choose the lightest one—many find it is less tiring to bowl with a lighter ball.  Maybe they choose the one with the biggest finger holes—this seems to only apply to Michelle due to her “abnormally large” thumb.  However, according to Kim Adler, one of the world’s best female bowlers, the weight of the ball is one of the most important aspects of performing well.  It is common knowledge that the ball should weigh ten percent of the bowler’s body weight, but as women age, they loose strength.  Kim claims that bowling with a ball that is too heavy forces a bowler to develop bad habits.  Therefore, middle-aged bowlers should consider dropping a pound from their ball weight, but no more.   Kim and Michelle both acknowledge that ball grease is another factor that bowlers need to be aware of.  Michelle bought a special powder for her hands to tighten her grip (she also warns to never apply lotion the morning of bowling—lotion adds extra grease to the mix and severely hinders one’s ability to bowl).  Shoe selection is another major aspect of the game—it costs $48 to rent shoes for an entire season and only around $30 to purchase a pair that will last a lifetime.  Not only is it cost effective to invest in shoes, but it also allows women to practice good hygiene because according to Michelle, “wearing shoes that other people have worn is disgusting”.  It appears that most women in the league agree with Michelle, as around 75% of women in the league have their own bowling shoes (Smith).    
Even more important than balls and shoes: attire.  Mary—an avid CAbi shopper—is highly knowledgeable about the proper bowling “dress code”: “Under no circumstances should a bowler ever wear a cardigan.  Ever.  They just get in the way.  Also, bowlers should not wear rings, or white shirts,” Mary said.  Washing grease out of a white shirt is a bigger headache than one might think, according to this fashion expert.  She recommends jeans or sweats with a casual and flexible shirt for optimal performance.  However, there are some teams that choose not to follow this highly sensible “dress code”: the “Bling is King” team consisted of younger women with spray tans, hair extensions, bedazzled tank tops, and unnecessarily high heels.  Medina Lanes even created a new rule because of this team: no woman bowler is allowed to wear heels over four inches tall into the bowling alley.  The alley took the women’s safety into consideration—walking through the icy parking lot in the middle of winter is far too dangerous to do in heels that high.  “Although they are no longer part of this league, they will be remembered for their excellent fashion tips,” Mary said.
Aside from this rather unique group of bowlers, Mary’s team loves the social aspect of the league.  Not unlike second grade soccer games, when it is someone’s birthday, everyone sings “Happy Birthday” and treats—typically elaborate cakes or homemade cookies—are brought out for the birthday girl (Johnson).  According to Michelle, the league becomes a family (not one that you’d invite over for Christmas, though).  In between turns, women from all teams talk about their families, exchange fashion and diet tips, and best of all: community gossip.  Unfortunately, bowling gets in the way of story telling, so news is shared in choppy segments with much repetition until all women hear the latest news (Johnson).  “It’s basically a networking opportunity for moms,” Michelle said.  It is not just the women at Medina Lanes that feel this way—according to Harvard political scientist, Robert D. Putnam, author of “Bowling Alone: The Collapse and Revival of American Community”, bowling is a people connector (Tillotson).  Unfortunately, this networking period is occasionally cut short.  The Wayzata school district uses Medina Lanes as a location for gym class and on these days, the women are pressured to finish bowling before the children arrive (Johnson).  “It’s very stressful and there is almost no time to socialize on these days.  We all hate when it happens,” said Mary. 
Whether for networking purposes, or just because it is a fun pastime, bowling can be enjoyed by anyone—ranging from 5200 B.C. Egyptians to Germans in the Middle Ages to middle-aged housewives in the 21st century (“Bowling”).  With the exception of minor details, bowling has remained the same for thousands of years; one major difference is that Ancient civilizations bowled with nine pins instead of the ten used today (“Bowling”).  The Dutch first introduced the use of ten pins  in bowling to America—they did so in an attempt to work around a colonial law against ninepin bowling (“Bowling”).  Though not in an attempt to evade colonial law, the technology of bowling continues to improve year after year.  According to John Berglund, executive director of the Bowling Proprietors Association of America, “bowling used to have a stigma as a smoke-filled activity in a dingy basement”, but recently, it has become a family outing (Prois).  This is because many bowling alleys have evolved into big supercenters that offer laser tag and arcade games  (Walsh).  The introduction of automatic pin set up in the 20th century was followed by the installment of television sets in bowling alleys—both of which increased the popularity of bowling in America (Berg).  Most alleys have transitioned from natural-wood lanes to synthetic lanes, as synthetic lanes hold oil better than real wood.   Additionally, instead of keeping score by hand , many alleys (Medina’s twelve lanes included) now have electronic scoring systems, which are helpful in reducing the risk of cheating during league play (Haga).  This is not to say no paperwork is required from league bowlers: Michelle is in charge of comparing final scores with the opponent and signing off on their legitimacy. 
It is this type of behavior that makes Michelle capable of leading her team.  Each team is required to elect a captain at the end of the year—the women also choose a president, treasurer, and secretary, as well as a “fun basket,”  Christmas party, and banquet planner for the upcoming season (Johnson).  Right now, Mary is the team captain since she has belonged to the league the longest, but her tardiness and constant distraction with CAbi has left the team wondering if this is the type of leadership that will lead to victory.  Michelle’s motivational speeches, desire to win, dependability, organization, and courage to approach the league supervisor are qualities embodied by a true captain. 
The competitive yet social nature of the bowling league has created great friendships among the women bowlers, but with the league supervisor, Beth, it is a different story.  Beth is a “gruff and dismissive” woman (Johnson).  She does a lot of behind the scenes work to update league standings and gets the alley ready for the Thursday morning bowlers; she is a great supervisor and is respected by the teams because she runs such a good league (Smith).  However, Laurie and Mary have had a hard time connecting with Beth.  Mary thinks that it is because Beth views the women as “silly housewives” and therefore judges them.  Laurie agrees, but history shows that there may be other reasons for Beth’s disapproval of Laurie…it was her first year in the bowling league when she made the grave mistake.  Laurie was unaware of the rule that shoes cannot be brought onto the wooden floor in the winter because wet shoes make a mess.  To avoid creating a puddle of muddy water on the floor, Laurie placed her boots on the chair next to her, piled her coat and purse on top of it, and began entering the team’s information into the machine.  The screen malfunctioned and Laurie went to Beth for assistance.  Unknowingly, Beth removed the lump of Laurie’s belongings from the chair, sat down, and began to work on the screen.  Seconds later, she jumped up and began to sternly scold Laurie for placing her wet boots on the chair (a scene that very much resembled a furious parent and a guilty child).  Needless to say, Laurie and Beth got off on the wrong foot, and neither has made an effort to establish a friendship. 
Besides making enemies, browsing through fashion catalogues, and indulging in birthday treats, believe it or not, the women do actually find time to bowl.  However, it seems that bowling ranks fairly low on the list of priorities for some.  “Oh, the socializing part is definitely my favorite,” Mary said after sharing how she is consistently the worst bowler on the team (there may or may not be a correlation between the two…).  On the other hand, Laurie holds the highest average for the team—she made the “500 Board”  (quite a feat).  Michelle falls somewhere in the middle; her average is much lower than Laurie’s, but it is only her first year in the league, so there is room for improvement.  In fact, she was on Beth’s “most improved” list one week.  As a whole, the league’s average weekly score  is 141—the women would need an average of 200 in order to join the PBA  (just to put things in perspective) (Johnson).  These women are clearly not professional bowlers, nor are they trying to become professionals.  They simply enjoy gossiping and shopping with some bowling on the side. 
With the season now over, boredom has crept back into these women’s lives.  “I miss bowling. I don’t know what to do with myself on Thursdays anymore” Michelle said, and it is safe to assume Laurie and Mary feel the same way.  The three women will bowl frequently in the summer to keep their skills polished, hoping to have more success next year.  Though excited to enjoy summer with their children home, September cannot come fast enough for these bowling fanatics at Medina Lanes.  Mary, Michelle, and Laurie represent the thousands of women across the country that devote themselves to this revered game. I cannot speak to the atmosphere of these other women’s leagues, but I do know one thing that every woman bowler has in common: a shared love for the game. 

 

 

 

 


 



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