I’m sure we all remember that question back in third grade that all the teachers asked us to write about. Well, I remember every second of that day. It was during discussion circle and we all choose which color square we wanted to sit on. I always choose the yellow square because I felt like I was sitting on the piece of the sun. The second the teacher asked, “If you could have one magical power, what would it be?” I was confused and annoyed. The thoughts and questions started swirling like a tornado in my head. How could a human collect magical powers? I never liked to believe that fantasy could interfere with reality because I always thought that fantasy was simply created to get our hopes up about what the world could be. Of course for the time-being I simply said, “My magical power would be to become invisible and read people’s minds.” As I grew, I always pondered on that question and every life-altering event somehow connected to that question. I, now, finally have an answer. A truthful answer. If I could have one magical power, it would be the power to be completely happy 100% of the time.

I’m pretty sure we all have our fears that we don’t like to admit. My biggest fear was having to face social anxiety and not being able to enjoy life’s golden moments. I lived with this fear and I had to face social anxiety for a while now. I am a going to be a freshman next week and I am 14 years old. Middle school hasn’t necessarily been the best time of my life. In fact, it was the worst times. Well, why don’t we take a flashback into those years. Middle school was scarier than a roller coaster. It put me through many low times and changed me for better or for worse. I never really knew what it was that pushed me into a world where I pretended to be someone that I’m not. It might’ve been the walks in the hallways and seeing other teens that were judgeful. Or the times where people would stare at me when I put my hearing equipment away. It was probably all these events that build up my social anxiety. No matter what I did, I always doubted who I was and my confidence slowly faded away like the nail polish I applied every week. I always needed validation from others and I refused to simply be happy with my quirkiness and stupidity. Flaws were considered mistakes and if you didn’t fall into the wrong groups, you were an outcast. I had labels written all over my body. Nothing was “right” with who I was, so I figured that all of that would go away if I allowed myself to be friends with the wrong people. After a while, the wrong people seemed like they were the right people because I was one of them. I allowed myself to get caught up with the gossip and the rumors and the constant fakeness. In fact, I remember the time I went ice skating with these friends. I had invited them to go ice skating as a fun and exciting time together. It turns out, I was simply their ride to the ice skating center and their ride back home. And after a while, I had trained my mind to believe that all I was, was just someone who gave rides to and from home. I never let myself believe that I was anything else other than that because deep down, who I really am was imperfect. You would probably tell me that it’s all normal. However, being insecure about every single detail in your body is miles away from normal. That’s when I realized that in order to be happy, I had to fight with my insecurities, and learning how to be comfortable with me wasn’t something I had a lot of practice with.

That’s is why I constantly wonder at night, what if I had some super power to just be happy, to not worry, to be able to love everything. I still wonder if that would be a good or a bad power to have. But in it all, I have realized being happy is another fantasy. Wouldn’t we all like to live in a world full of smiles and cheerfulness. But, that’s not what our world is. We have our worst times and our best times. But, now it kind of makes you wonder, where is our diversity in personality if we don’t have our toughest moments? We would all just be the same, no difficult times to inspire us to make better times happen.

After these three years of middle school, there is one thing I realized. We all have a super power. The super power is going through all the difficult moments and still having the drive in them to fight another battle. We’re all heroes for ourselves in different ways. We might fantasize about a better world with better people and just peace and quietness all around, but what some of us don’t realize is that we all have the power to fix what is broken. And who knows? Maybe my power to overcome these times can help another hero find their lost power. While my answer is long overdue its deadline, I’m happy that my third grade teacher asked that very question and I’m glad I found my answer. Now, there’s only one thing left, have you found your answer?