i understand it was not my fault that you two separated
and it was not me who put myself on this earth, you had some part in it
was it me who made you leave forever?
because it was not me who made you want to stay
so you didn't
it was me who you held when i was younger
it was me who you taught to build snowmen
where are you now?
i try to act like i don't care
like it's not such a big deal if you are here or not
but it is
you will not be there to teach me how to drive
to tell me not to date until i am 21
to call me "daddy's little girl"
or to call me at all
will you be there on graduation?
who will fill your empty seat?
will you walk me down the aisle?
who will give me away?
maybe if i block you out of my mind
i can forget
i will forget your face
and the way that you smell
but my heart will always remember
This piece has been published in Teen Ink’s monthly print magazine.