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Me and Him
My, regrettably, Ex is texting me. At long distance we discontinued our relationship and I still love him. I don't live a fantasy, this is a real feeling of love. We both felt it.
We are catching up because i haven't talked to him in a long time.
'Hey' I typed.
'Hey' was his reply.
I repeated the same question I always do. 'How are you?' I asked.
'Pretty good haven't talked to you in like 4 weeks'
I typed 'I know, im sorry, My mom passworded the computer, and i just got it back. So how is everything?'
I had a long pause because i was messaging his phone. so while i waited i was on my Myspace and Facebook checking messages. When he finally replied he said:
'Things are pretty good, and you, any new boyfriends?'
I told him ' no, i waste my time reading and thinking and talking to my sister when she calls, plus im still hooked on you'
At this point i got no reply so i eventually just didn't say anything for an hour. I talked to a few of my girlfriends and talked to my sister on the phone. Then my mom beeped in and asked me to do something so i left the computer in my room, and got what mom needed me to deliver over the phone. When I returned to the computer, I saw that my step dad wrote to 2 people that I was messaging 'im a lesbo', no offense ladies.
And of course my ex with his sarcastic remarks replies:
'when did that come about?'
As i took half an hour explaining everything to him and the other person it was told to.I ended everything with:
'im still awesome right??.. By the way is bloody Valentine a good stay at home V Day movie?'
He replied ' i saw it, its not that good. y r u staying home that day?'
' Well i have nothing better to do, my mom and stepdad are going out to dinner, and the siblings are going to their grandparents' I said.
'well you could always get a guy that would take you out to dinner, thats what i would do' He said.
' well im not looking plus i'd love to go with you, Great Guy' Yes the flirting might have been too much, but i did what i could to let him know i still love him.
'well thats not a smart thing now is it?' he said.
'Well was i ever really smart???'I asked sarcastically
'A little bit. Lol hey i got a question and this is for both you and me. What do you think of me and
At this point i was flushed in the face, and couldn't breath. I wanted to cry. He had been dating her for about 2 months and it still killed me to think about it. I asked some friends for advice and as i was in my paused state he wrote ' and be honest please'
That was the killer. I had to be honest. i was going to lie and say it didnt bother me one bit and that i was happy for him. The truth was and this i told him word for word.
'well in all honesty, i still love you, and even though we are far apart i'd do anything to have you back. But if you are happy with her than i am happy for you.' I said
I now waited very nervously. and he finally replied : 'and thats god's honest truth, you didn't leave anything out?'
'Besides the fact that i miss you beyond belief and that it will always kill me you are with her?' i said.
After that i didn't get any reply, so after waiting a full hour i messaged him a goodnight, and signed off.
I don't know what I really should do. When love walks in but never walks out, its hurting when things are going on at those hard times. Long distance relationships are worth it. Love is worth fighting for. But when things happen that you can't control, love is still possible. Ill just be patient and hope for the best.