What matters most to me is life.

January 11, 2008
By
What matters most? What matters most to me is life. Actual life, not the role playing, puppet-string style of existing which binds most. I believe full throttle, wind in your hair, every day is a risk, joy, and new experience kind of life is the only kind worth living, the only kind that matters.
Someone once asked me why I don’t think things through before acting. I was confused by this question, and they clarified that they didn’t understand how I could be so reckless and asked if I was ever scared of the possible consequences. I informed them that I was not in fact reckless, but I took calculated risks. She questioned my math ability with these calculations (and rightfully so, it isn’t quite my forte). I told her that I like to get right up near the edge of the cliff, and stick a toe out. I never jump off and I always step back when the pebbles start to cascade down the mountain, but I live on the edge. At this point, she gave up on my math ability and instead questioned my sanity. She asked how I could be so audacious as to tempt death in such a manner. This was the most perplexing question for me, because I didn’t see it as tempting death, but as living life. I informed her of my philosophy and asked why it had to be one or the other: Why was I seen as tempting death by truly living my life, anything else would be simple existence.
She followed this response by asking if I had any regrets. To her amazement I said no. I elaborated by telling her I didn’t believe in regrets, as long as I had fun at the time, learned something, or had a new story to tell because of it, then what reason was there to regret. Not to mention, nothing ever came from regrets, you can’t change the past and the only things that will come from worrying about it are wrinkles.
I try to give every opportunity a chance, experience everything once, and always keep my mind open to all possibilities. Through this lifestyle I have been rewarded ten-fold. I have received appreciation of my family, amazing friends, once in a lifetime opportunities, unforgettable experiences, life lessons, and stories that no one else will ever tell. It is this kind of life, opportunity and fearlessness that matter. After all, the greater the risk, the greater the reward.
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