Mom, I’m Gay | Teen Ink

Mom, I’m Gay MAG

By Anonymous

     I remember that day when I proudly stated, “Mom, I’m gay.” I felt liberated - until I realized that she wanted to push me out of the car. Liberation, all right. Good thing I wasn’t liberated from my seat belt.

I’ve always been one to test the waters. Sometimes the outcome is good, like admitting I’m gay, and sometimes the outcome is tragic, like that haircut in third grade.

I decided to tell her that night because she was mad at me already. Yes, and my parents call me the smart child. I felt the need to test the limits again. Besides, how much deeper could I dig myself?

Well, it turns out, pretty far.

“Mom, I’m gay.”

The car swerved to the left. Honk. Then to the right. Beep. As she straightened out, I realized I had just blabbed the secret of a lifetime; some people keep this inside their whole lives while I blurted it out on a car ride to my therapist’s office.

“No, you’re not.”

“Yes, I am,” I responded, just for the sake of contradicting her. “Look, I’m going out on a limb to tell you. It’s not easy for me.” Well, there it was. It just came out. Once I got going, it was pretty easy.

“I just want you to be normal. Don’t you want to be normal?”

“I do! This has nothing to do with being normal!” An argument. Things were getting interesting.

“Then fix it. Don’t be gay!”

Oh, if I could have screamed, I would have! Fix it? There’s nothing to be fixed! Toilets need to be fixed! My sexuality? Nope! Being gay isn’t something I could do anything about. I was mad, so I huffed and puffed in silence as she drove, white-knuckled, down the highway.

At the therapist’s office, I bawled about how unlucky I was to have a mother who lacked understanding, was uncaring and was a bad driver. The therapist called my mom in, saying the three of us needed to talk. I sensed a fiasco.

Mom walked in with a fake smile. I wanted to tell her to wipe it off, but that wasn’t what we were here for. She sat next to me and I started analyzing her every move. Okay, she sat down next to me. That’s good. Extra long blink. Not good. She doesn’t even want to look at me. She’s shifting in her seat. She’s uncomfortable. Or maybe she’s trying to get closer to me. Or farther away.

“Hello? Earth to you, dear.”

“Umm.” Perfect. I felt like an idiot. My therapist was being paid huge amounts of money to hear me say umm and analyze my mother’s every move? I was so busy looking at my mom that I’d completely missed what my therapist had been saying.

“I think you know that Mom loves you no matter what. And Mom, this isn’t an attention thing. I’ve known this for a while. It’s no big secret.” Well, not anymore!

We went home that evening pretending nothing had happened. I was careful not to distract my mother.

And today? Well, we’re getting along. I’ve learned to love the fact that I like girls and am secure in my sexuality, I’ve been able to tell other people. I’m not ashamed anymore. It’s who I am. Just like I’ll always mismatch my socks, I’ll always have a weakness for underwear shopping and hazelnut coffee, and I’ll always like girls. My mother may not exactly love it, but she can deal. But just wait until I bring home my first girlfriend!



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This article has 196 comments.


Meerie said...
on Jun. 29 2011 at 5:38 am
I love your style, it truly gives an edge to your article! But I wish you'd have elaborated on how it worked out, because not only would it give us more good stuff to read but it's also what seems to be a main point in any "coming-out story". Yours seems far from the ordinary such story in its' voice, however, so congrats. (:

on Jun. 29 2011 at 3:17 am
cookie_monsta BRONZE, Santa Rosa, California
4 articles 1 photo 7 comments

Favorite Quote:
love is a hobby not a requirement to me

I want to tell my mother so badly that I'm bisexual. It's not with our religion though.(Christian) But can I really help it? This is beautifully written by the way. :)

Bucket GOLD said...
on Jun. 25 2011 at 1:39 am
Bucket GOLD, Hayward, California
10 articles 0 photos 2 comments

Favorite Quote:
" We carry guitar cases full of phobias hoping to turn fear into our strongest instrument.- Rudy Francisco

I truly applaud you for writing this!.. I've always pictured my coming out like this. Keep it up =)

on Jun. 21 2011 at 1:46 pm
SomethingLikeFire BRONZE, Mchenry, Illinois
1 article 1 photo 47 comments

Favorite Quote:
"Pippin: What about elevenses? Luncheon? Afternoon tea? Dinner? Supper? He knows about them, doesn't he?" -
-- The Lord Of The Rings: The Fellowship Of The Ring

good for you! you are who you are, you can't change it but you can accept it.

on Jun. 21 2011 at 1:39 pm
SomethingLikeFire BRONZE, Mchenry, Illinois
1 article 1 photo 47 comments

Favorite Quote:
"Pippin: What about elevenses? Luncheon? Afternoon tea? Dinner? Supper? He knows about them, doesn't he?" -
-- The Lord Of The Rings: The Fellowship Of The Ring

why shouldn't she write this? she did something that a lot of people will never have the guts to do. Why not be proud of it?

chel-z-boo said...
on Jun. 14 2011 at 9:38 am
chel-z-boo, Marietta, Georgia
0 articles 0 photos 2 comments
I loved your article. Mainly because I know what it's like to have to face my mom and tell her about my sexuality. It was difficcult at first, but she finally came along. This piece was effective because i can relate. I loved that you appealed to the senses and that helped the piece be more visual. I absolutely loved it.

on Jun. 7 2011 at 7:55 pm

This is in response to anthony1414's question, "why did you choose to write this?" i put it up here cause i wanted everyone else to see this.

The same reason why anyone writes anything. the same reason why anyone draws anything. the same reason why anyone plays any musical instrument. none of things might be essential to living, but they get your thoughts and feelings out, and i sure thought that this piece got this person's feelings out.


on Jun. 7 2011 at 6:25 pm
heatherbug DIAMOND, Elon, North Carolina
71 articles 0 photos 27 comments

so true...thats awsome that you could tell people like that

 


on Jun. 7 2011 at 1:05 pm
IamtheshyStargirl PLATINUM, Lothlorien, Utah
44 articles 16 photos 2206 comments

Favorite Quote:
Boredom instigates extreme creativity.
~Amoniel

"Bowing gratefully to all of my subjects, 'thank you. Thank you. The pleasure is mine." Nah, I'm just kidding. We're all kings together.'"
~Thesilentraven

I love your brashness in writing this, it's awesome that you can admit that, and feel completely comfortablt in your admition.

on Jun. 7 2011 at 12:37 pm
Midkinght-Warrior BRONZE, Erie, Pennsylvania
2 articles 0 photos 5 comments

Favorite Quote:
Experience the most brutal of teachers but you learn My god you learn


-CS Lewis

Happy 4 you

on Jun. 7 2011 at 10:57 am
theartgeek97 SILVER, Greenville, South Carolina
6 articles 3 photos 40 comments
I agree.  My religion also says this is wrong and I am against it.  However, I feel it isn't my place to judge people.  That's God's job, and He loves EVERYBODY. :)  I disagree with this article but think it was written well.

on Jun. 7 2011 at 10:45 am
Brittbyheart SILVER, Yucca Valley, California
6 articles 9 photos 44 comments

Favorite Quote:
No matter what you do in life, in the end, the only person that will take impact is you.

I was raised up in a christain home and my family all say gays and lesbians are wrong. My opinion? God made US who WE are. We were born gay, and if that is who God wants us to be, than why say it is not okay? Food for though.

on Jun. 7 2011 at 10:44 am
Brittbyheart SILVER, Yucca Valley, California
6 articles 9 photos 44 comments

Favorite Quote:
No matter what you do in life, in the end, the only person that will take impact is you.

They did not say they hate them, thay just dont agree. (personaly, I am all for homosexuality, I have nothing agenst the people) But I also believe that obama shouldnt be preseident, but I never go starting fights about it. Not that im agreeing with this person, I dont believe in judging a person by their sexuality

 


on Jun. 7 2011 at 10:40 am
Brittbyheart SILVER, Yucca Valley, California
6 articles 9 photos 44 comments

Favorite Quote:
No matter what you do in life, in the end, the only person that will take impact is you.

This was an excilent article. I am very very proud of you for stepping up in who you are. Good girl! lol, and I hope everything turns out the way you hope.

on Jun. 7 2011 at 8:32 am
AlexPaige BRONZE, Johannessburg, Other
3 articles 0 photos 3 comments

Favorite Quote:
"Beneath this mask is more than just flesh. Beneath this mask is an idea Mr. Creedy and ideas are bulletproof."

good. you should allow your courage to teach those out there who are hiding their sexuality that it is okay.

on Jun. 7 2011 at 7:34 am
K.M.S.Shear BRONZE, Cherokee, Iowa
2 articles 0 photos 57 comments

Favorite Quote:
"Some people think writing is a waist of their time. For me it’s a way to draw an image of myself through the painting of words."

very interesting story

on May. 31 2011 at 4:04 pm
Musicfeedsthesoul07 PLATINUM, Naperville, Illinois
25 articles 0 photos 95 comments

Favorite Quote:
"Be nice to nerds. Chances are you'll end up working for one. " - Bill Gates

I agree with Staygold,  nice analogy too!!! 

Exactly it's mindless and is just like discriminating people because of their race. Just like skin color sexual orientation isn't something people choose. 


on May. 31 2011 at 10:25 am
musicprincess PLATINUM, Braselton, Georgia
23 articles 0 photos 84 comments

Favorite Quote:
They say that love is forever, your forever is all that I need

You're a very brave and confident person for posting this :) More power to you my friend. For all of the haters, judge not lest ye be judged and don't pretend to know everything just because you go to ch.urch. This is no different than preffering blondes over brunettes or tall over short. It's a preference, not some disease or malfunction, so I ask in the nicest way possible, get a grip and stop hating on people who are confident with themselves.

TheDuck GOLD said...
on May. 31 2011 at 10:14 am
TheDuck GOLD, Braselton, Georgia
11 articles 12 photos 77 comments

Favorite Quote:
“Raids, bullets, crime... no problem. A missing duster? Crisis."-The Last Sacrifice
"If we stand for nothing, we'll fall for anything." -All Time Low

ANd about the whole " God hates you because of your FREAKING INDIVIDUALITY" is like saying "God hates you because your favorite color is is red" or because "you like chocolate more than vanilla"!!!  It's a stupid argument!  What is really is, is discrimination!  It is simply ridiculous!!!

TheDuck GOLD said...
on May. 31 2011 at 10:07 am
TheDuck GOLD, Braselton, Georgia
11 articles 12 photos 77 comments

Favorite Quote:
“Raids, bullets, crime... no problem. A missing duster? Crisis."-The Last Sacrifice
"If we stand for nothing, we'll fall for anything." -All Time Low

My best friend is bi and I love her to pieces.  I just don't see why people have a problem with OTHER PEOPLE's- not their's!!!!- sexual orientation.  It has nothing to with them!!!  I think it is ridiculous