As we all know, depression is something difficult that we as humans deal with. Some deal with depression differently than others. Some people can cope rather easy. Other people such as myself when they lose the one they love,in my case the one that I fell in love with, its the hardest thing in the world. My fiance Daniel waldo died in September 1st 2011 at 12:11 am. I was there at the hospital two hours before he died. I loved him with everything I had. He loved me for me and that's all I ever wanted. When someone we love or are close to dies, sometimes we blame God for it. God doesn't do that. When Daniel died, I didn't blame God. I blamed myself and I still do even though I shouldn't. And going through grief is hard. I thought I would be ok because I knew he was in a better place but I was wrong. What I'm going through, I'm blaming myself, denying hes gone and getting angry with everyone all at the same time which isn't a good combination. He was born with cystic fibrosis, medically induced diabetes and had an allergy to nuts. I had to constantly watch what I ate. Now that he's gone, I still check labels on things and if I eat something with nuts, I automatically go and brush my teeth. He and I were supposed to get married last October 31st of 2011. Things will be fine for a while but then the littlest thing will happen and I'll go into a massive breakdown. But for everyone or anyone who is going through depression, do not give up that everything is going to go to pieces. Things will get better it's just gonna take some time. If you feel like you can't talk to anyone, I have a suggestion. What I do to get over my depression is I write letters to him. It feels like I'm talking to him and it makes getting over my depression easier.
April 4, 2012