It started in fourth grade. At first it was a minor thing. Something annoying. Something I sometimes thought was cool. Then it became debilitating. It came to the point where I could not carry a cup of water. Writing became difficult.

My mother took me to the doctor. I explained my symptoms, my shaky hands. After many tests they decided that I had essential tremor. There is nothing essential about essential tremor: or ET as I call it.

Many people do not know about essential tremor. Common among the elderly ET doesn’t seem to make itself known outside the nursing home. The idea of it is your body shakes uncontrollably. For me my hands, and legs are the problem. The shaking of my legs makes it impossible to use stairs. And shaky hands just make everything difficult.

Through these struggles I have learned coping skills for dealing with it. I have learned that if I use a heavy cup it is less easy to spill. But I use sippy cups and travel mugs for most of my beverages. Typing has changed my life, I can say what I want to say through my writing.

I have to say that there were times when it didn't seem worth it. Frustrated because the spoon never makes it into my mouth. Tired because I spent all night handwriting my math homework. Many times I want to give it all up. Say to God “I’m done with this, can you take it back now.”

But sometimes I think of it as simply a technicality. I have ET, sometimes is not what defines me. Because I do not have ET. I am a girl with shaky hands, who does the same things you do.


I would like to promote awareness of ET: for more info visit http://www.essentialtremor.org/