This is the life that has come to me. I would have never believed it could be lead to this fact. I grab the knife, walk to the bathroom, sit and the floor, and uncover my damaged arm. One that shows no clue or hint of skin left. One that doesn't show any signs of clear skin. All I see is red, purple, and black. All I see is... CUTS. Cuts that aren't just from being abused by my father or my mother. Cuts and bruises that are not from my peers constantly beating me. It my own damage of my self being. Constantly wish for my life to change. I want to run away from this, but the more I run, the severity of my human soul is diminished to a pulp. I can't stand watching others be perfect while I'm standing here, with all of my flaws exposed to the world. I see nothing but darkness in my eyes. As I bring the knife closer to my wrist, I close my eyes knowing this is the last I will ever do this. This is the last I will ever live to see my own body. I get up, take one look at myself in the mirror and simile for the last time. I laugh for the last time. I sit down once more, bringing the knife to my wrist, crying and screaming for the last time. I feel my human soul coming out. As I finish, I see my scars turn black. I see my blood turn white. I hear the sirens of people forcing and taking there own breath to revive me. I see my life flash past my eyes. To my birth, to watching my brother die in my arms, to my first beating, to my last cut. I can see the light and I can see the darkness. I have been given a choice. A choice of the matter of life or death. I turn back at all my sorrow and pain. I walk to the light seeing my wings form. I am in clouds flying above all pain. The last thing I hear of my human being is my final heart beats coming a seize... Forever.
March 11, 2013