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I've Been Selfish...

ColorfulExpectations posted this thread...
Oct. 8, 2012 at 1:18 pm

So, last night I was thinking about my life, wallowing about how hard it's been. When I finally went to sleep, I had a dream that (for some reason) J.esus came to visit me. The strange part about that is I'm not r.eli.gious in the slightlest. In fact, for most of my life, I have rebelled against my C.atholic upbringing.

Anyway, in the dream J.esus told me that I should not be so selfish. People (even a few in my neighborhood) have it far worse than I do.
"But J.esus," I said, "Don't you remember what happend last year between me and that boy? Don't you remember that my boyfriend/fiance of two years left me over the summer? Not to mention how badly I'm treated by everyone, including my parents!"
Then J.esus did something that surpised me. He was completely silent. Instead, He pulled some memories from the back of my mind and showed them to me. He showed me so many things that I can't even remember them all. However, I will list a few of the things He showed me.
The first thing J.esus showed me was my parents. He showed me many of the times when they were so kind, it's almost unimaginable. One example that he showed me was when I got kicked out of my middle school, and they were hardly even upset. They even bargained with the principal to have a tutor from the school come and tutor me so that I could finish my 7th grade year. He showed me many other examples of how my parents have been kind, but there are far too many to list.
The next thing He showed me was my friend Francine. She has been r.a.ped 3 times, once by her biological mom's moyfriend when she was three or four years old. Then J.esus took me to a time when Francine and I were in my pool, talking about our lives. He showed me a snipped of our conversationw hen Francince told me that she had watched her biological mother burn to death in their house.
"I was only four," she had said, "and I saw my mom die."
Then Francine had gone on to explain why the fire had been started. It had been her mom's boyfriend's doing. She had told her mom what had happened, and her mom had called the cops. The boyfriend had lied his way out of it, then burned down their house. He's in jail for life, now.
One of the last things J.esus showed me was all of the fights my ex-boyfriend and I had gotten into, and how cruel he had been to me. That's when I realized that it was for the best. All of it was for the best. Every single "bad" thing that has happened to me in my life happened so that I could learn from it. And you know what? Most of it wasn't even that bad.

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Six_Tooth_Sun replied...
Oct. 10, 2012 at 5:59 am

The dream is such a powerful force, how a dream can bring clarity to a situation or even a lifetime. I enjoyed reading your post. I do think that through this existence, we constantly learn. Without the bad things, there's not much to strive for or accomplish. We are all flawed creatures by nature...yet we keep learning. 

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