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murphyboi16 posted this thread...
Oct. 22, 2013 at 2:49 pm

Hello everyone my name is Emma. I am 16 years old and have asperger's syndrome. i was adopted at birth and i love my family.
I wanted to talk about something VERY EXTREMELY personal!
My dad is 70 and i am getting worried that he will die soon. he is really very healthy but has some knee problems and he smokes. i just get worried that one day he will be right in front of me and then the next day when i wake up he will be gone in a blink of the eye.
any advice how to feel better about this?
please reply to me as soon as you see this! thank you!
~murphyboi16

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ramfthomas4This teenager is a 'regular' and has contributed a lot of work, comments and/or forum posts, and has received many votes and high ratings over a long period of time. replied...
Oct. 23, 2013 at 10:52 am

Hello Emma.
Don't be scared.
First of all, lots of people live beyond 70.  Though 70 is getting on in years, there is no reason for your dad to pass away any time soon.
This is sort of a separate issue, but have you talked to him about smoking?  If he's been a smoker for a long time it will be a hard habit to kick, but it may improve his health.
My advice to you would be to focus more on spending time with your dad so that you have memories and less time thinking what it will be like when he's gone.
I'm not very good at reasurance, I tend to be too analytical, but I hope this helps. 

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Paulski replied...
Nov. 3, 2013 at 8:01 pm

I know how you feeel. My grandma's always been there my whole life. I mean, literally, always. She's like my second mother. And she's getting there with her age. I'll be honest, it scares me, but I don't think about that. I think about the fact that she's here now, and that's what's important now. Everyone dies, and if you spend too much time worrying about them not being there in the future, you won't be able to enjoy their time here with you.

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Liz_RuthThis teenager is a 'regular' and has contributed a lot of work, comments and/or forum posts, and has received many votes and high ratings over a long period of time. replied...
Nov. 5, 2013 at 5:57 pm

This is quite normal. People are always affraid of death, but you see, we shouldn't be affraid of death at all. We all know we are going to die, we just don't believe it . If we did believe it, we would do things differently. Yes, 70 is getting up there, but honestly, just think, people die much much younger than that. And if he dies, don't let it take over all your emotions. Let yourself have a little time of pity, then detach yourself from that emotion. Death ends a life, not a relationship. He will always be with you. That's what he was put on Earth for. 

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murphyboi16 replied...
Dec. 1, 2013 at 10:32 am

thanks so much this really helps me see things better

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