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was it my fault? :"(

Naomi P. posted this thread...
Oct. 19, 2012 at 11:14 am

In the winter of 2006, my brother passed away from drug overdose. He was my best friend. I did not even get to attend the funeral, because my mother and I had moved from Michigan to Arkansas that summer. My sister, Nicole, keeps trying to pin his death on me, though it was his own choice. I wondered why she did so. Then she told me when I had came to visit that year (back to michigan), a few minutes after we had left my sister Jenifers house(where we were staying) he had shown up to see me when I wasn't there. I cry every year on the anniversery of his birthday, and death. I try to talk to my mom about it, but she just tells me to suck it up or calls me names. I don't talk to my real dad,  and all my sibblings are 16 years older then me, so they dont have time for the baby. My stepdad calls me a whiner, but really I just need a friend. Is it my fault? :"(

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Courage-and-HonorThis teenager is a 'regular' and has contributed a lot of work, comments and/or forum posts, and has received many votes and high ratings over a long period of time. replied...
Oct. 19, 2012 at 11:17 am

No, it's not your fault, Naomi.  You're sister is probably just hurting and wanting to place blame.  I'm sorry you had to go through this.  But please remember, your brother made his own choices, you didn't choose for him, you can't keep blaming yourself.  You'll just hurt yourself more, and I'm sure your brother wouldn't want you hurting youself with slef-blame.  *Hugs Naomi*
 
God Bless and Comfort You.
 
 
PS: I really like the name Naomi.  And if you ever need to rant I'll listen and try to help as best as I can.

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hopelessnostalgic replied...
Oct. 23, 2012 at 2:47 pm

Naomi, it's not your fault remotely. None of it is. Please remember that. I know how hard it can be to lose someone that close to you; loss comes with so much pain and everyone handles that pain (grieves) differently. It seems like your sister's way of grieving is placing the blame on someone else. Even years after the fact, this is, unfortunately, normal. Don't be too bothered by it, although I know it's easier said than done. Try to keep your head held high. It sounds like you're in a tough spot, and needing someone to talk to. School counselors are always available for this sort of thing; you'd be really surprised how much they can help you. I wish you nothing but the best!

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Sharkgirl replied...
Oct. 24, 2012 at 12:19 am

Naomi how can something like this be your fault? Even though I've never had anyone close to me die i feel your pain. Its never easy to lose someone your close to. I'm sure your sister just needed to blame someone and you were in the line of fire. Your sister just needed some closer and unforanatly blaming you gave her that. i don't really know if this will help but listen to the song Play On, and remember even though we may not know you we are here for you. 

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Naomi P. replied...
Oct. 24, 2012 at 10:51 am

thanks :} that really means alot. <3

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Naomi P. replied...
Oct. 24, 2012 at 10:56 am

For some reason i cnt get my email on here probably for security reasons. i was gna say if u ever need a friend, i can be a friend :) u guys helped me, its only fair to help you guys too :)

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Sharkgirl replied...
Oct. 24, 2012 at 10:29 pm

Naomi if we can't help each other then why are even here? Plus everyone needs a friend no one should be alone.

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Sharkgirl replied...
Oct. 24, 2012 at 10:29 pm

Smiles and hugs Naomi

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NaomiLee replied...
Oct. 25, 2012 at 10:51 am

my email goes like this: hannah parrish 97 at yahoo .com except you gotta squish the name together....and the number...and use the at thingy.... lol y'all are smart you got this
 

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DynamoThis teenager is a 'regular' and has contributed a lot of work, comments and/or forum posts, and has received many votes and high ratings over a long period of time. replied...
Oct. 25, 2012 at 1:32 pm

Probably not your fault. But then your sister could be an attention seeker(suffering from ADD, they often do things like that). And we guys have been made for this kinda thing:)

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NaomiLee replied...
Oct. 25, 2012 at 2:33 pm

thats cool courage, its all good! I understand (: & nice Dynamo that made me smile thanks :)
 

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Sharkgirl replied...
Oct. 26, 2012 at 12:55 am

Don't you guys just love Teen Ink it takes complete strangers that we will probably never meet in person and make them friends :-D

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NaomiLee replied...
Oct. 26, 2012 at 10:45 am

Yes! lol :)

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DynamoThis teenager is a 'regular' and has contributed a lot of work, comments and/or forum posts, and has received many votes and high ratings over a long period of time. replied...
Oct. 26, 2012 at 11:23 am

No prob buddy. Just stick out here and you'll find out all of us are weird nerds who care a lot and debate a lot too:P

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brooklynbabe96 replied...
Oct. 27, 2012 at 10:50 am

F***K NO!!! That's just mean though... how your family is treating you after the death of your brother. I know how that feels to lose a sibling for i just lost my sister.
I hate those kind of people. i hate that people feel they have the right to put the blame on someone for something that just happened.
Here's my advice: don't bother going to them for help... go to your school councilors, a teacher you trust, or me... someone who understands what you are facing. I blame myself for my mother's death and still do today. I blame myself for my father not wanting his little girl in his life anymore. I was called a b***h everyday by my foster mom.
I'll be that shoulder you can cry on if you want. I'm willing to be that kind of friend for you.

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Monie5604 replied...
Nov. 2, 2012 at 8:43 am

its going to be fine dont give up

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Sharkgirl replied...
Nov. 4, 2012 at 4:52 pm

Group Hug?

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NaomiLee replied...
Nov. 5, 2012 at 10:49 am

Yes, that sounds great!:333
 

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Sharkgirl replied...
Nov. 7, 2012 at 8:47 pm

(smiles and hugs everyone)

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tatertot15 replied...
Feb. 12, 2013 at 10:58 am

. Definitely not your fault !! And its sad that your sister is putting this on you . Maybe its her way of coping but it still isnt right becuz you're learning to deal too and for her to place the blame on you is ridiculous . Im sorry for your loss but know that what happened was nothing you could help . God bless you .

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