Teen Ink

Aircrafter replied...

Yesterday, at lunch with my father and brother, celebrating my birthday.



Me: I've just been playing Dark Souls.

Brother: Oh, right. Hey, there's a game where you steal people's souls.

Dad: ._.?

Me: You don't steal people's souls...You just take them... -_-''

Brother: Yeah, in self-defense, right?

Me: Yeah, they attacked first so I took their souls.

Brother: Because you had no other options, of course.

Father: *cracking up.*

Me: S-Shut up ._.

OceanStorm replied...

Mammy and I: *Watching murder mystery where murderer is crazy poisoner*
Daddy: *comes in with two glasses of wine and gives one to mammy*  Goodbye
Me: *slow head turn toward him with horrified look*
Daddy: Er--  I mean "goodnight".
Mammy and I: *Look at wine, look at each other, look at tv*
Me: DON'T DRINK IT MAM!
Mammy: I'm not drinking this.

Aeliss-Novak-the-Zombie-Space-Pirate replied...

Brother #5: *looks at watch* It's 4:10.
Sister #3: *looks at her watch* 4:12.
Me: FROGGIES!
Sister #3: I like Foobles.
Me: I said froggies.
Sister #3: Oh.
Me: WHITAKER!
Brother #5: I'm not a pretty bird.

Aeliss-Novak-the-Zombie-Space-Pirate replied...

Brother #4 and I: *in the kitchen, making tea*
 
Brother #4: *dumps the rest of the sugar container into his cup* Haha, no more sugar.
 
Me: I wasn't going to use it.
 
Brother #4: Oh. I was really hoping you were going to.
 
Me: Speaking of which, Soy Sauce.
 
Brother #4: High point of everyone's day.
 
Me: Uh-huh. *leaves the room*
 
Sister #2: ...And she just leaves.

Aeliss-Novak-the-Zombie-Space-Pirate replied...

Brother #4: It's the doom of the universe, a vessel of evil.
 
Me: It's a mushroom.
 
Brother #4: We must destroy this foul thing before it destroys us.
 
Sister #3: *runs over* FIRE!!
 
Brother #4: You can't kill it with something like fire, it's-
 
Me: *cuts in* It has anti-inflamitory mushroom juices!
 
Brother #4: Good for the digestion. But it will still kill you.
 
Sister #3: Maybe it's just a mushroom.
 
Brother #4 *takes one lick* Nope, definately the doom of us all.

Aeliss-Novak-the-Zombie-Space-Pirate replied...

Me: Spud! Give me a really good word.
 
Brother #5: Microchiropteran.
 
Me: ...How do you spell that?
 
Brother #5: *writes it down*

OceanStorm replied...

*several months ago, between 3rd and 4th period in school*
Me: *leaving History room*
Marji: *walks into History room*
Me: OMG MARJIMARJIMARJIMARJI THEY STARTED FILMING SEASON THREE OF SHERLOCK!
Marji: OH MY GOSH ARE YOU SERIOUS?
Me: *actually screaming now* YES!  AND IT'S ACTUALLY GOING TO BE RELEASED THIS YEAR!!!
Me and Marji: *jumping up and down* EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!
History Teacher: *sitting at desk staring at us* Yo guys have a problem.

Aeliss-Novak-the-Zombie-Space-Pirate replied...

Me, Mom, and various siblings: *watching Sherlock*
 
Random Barn Swallow: *flies through the room and slams into window*
 
Everyone else: .........