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Funny/weird conversations/quotes

May 7, 2013 at 9:09 pm

Me: Spud! Give me a really good word.
 
Brother #5: Microchiropteran.
 
Me: ...How do you spell that?
 
Brother #5: *writes it down*

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May 11, 2013 at 1:17 am

Me, Mom, and various siblings: *watching Sherlock*
 
Random Barn Swallow: *flies through the room and slams into window*
 
Everyone else: .........

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Jun. 13, 2013 at 7:54 pm

Brother #4: *holds up bottle of brown paint with picture of cartoon lion on label* Look at his face. It looks like someone's squeezing his naughty bits.
Me: O.O I've never noticed that before.
 
Brother #4: Yeah, and look at this one. *points at green bottle with alarmed frog on it* It looks like he's watching.
 
 
****
 
-a few days later-
 
Brother #4: *shows bottle to Mom* See his face?



Mom: Yeah? It's just squeezing paint out of a bottle.
 
Me: *collapses in a fit of giggles*
 
Mom: ? What...

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Jun. 13, 2013 at 8:04 pm

B (my neighbor's 3-year-old granddaughter): *looks up at the sky* The sky is blue! The clouds are all hiding behind the sun! *looks at me* Do you know what clouds are?
 
Me: No, what?
 
B: Fluffies! Comfortable fluff.
 
Me: *points at sister #3* What's she made of then?



B: Clover rectangles.

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Jun. 26, 2013 at 9:51 pm

Fireman: *holds up suspenders* Does anyone know what this is?
 
Little boy: JETPACK!!

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I-Dont-Give-a-BEEP replied...
Jun. 26, 2013 at 11:23 pm

Friend: It seems like commericals are getting stupider and stupider.
 
Me: That's cuz the whole human population is getting stupider and stupider.

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RollingGirl replied...
Jul. 3, 2013 at 4:22 pm

((Oh my gosh Ocean! That reminded me when my sister played Zelda xD))
Me and cousin: *watching my sister play Legend of Zelda: Ocarina of time*
Me: I'm bored... Let's name the characters like we did in F.E.A.R!!! :D
Cousin: Okay! What's Link's name?
Me: Rrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrroberto! XD
Sister: Roberto? O.o
Me/Cousin: No! Rrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrroberto! XD
Sister: Okay? =_=' *calls for Epona in the game*
Cousin: *points at Epona* Her name will be Poncho!!! :D
Me: Ooooo Nice! XD
Sister: ?? -_-'... *riding Epona and big poe appears* Oh look a PoePoe(what my sister calls them)
Me: No~ It's Caca!
Cousin: *dieing from laughter* xD
Sister: Are we just doing a Spanish theme here or what? -_- *captures poe*
Me: *says cousin's name* Read the post and replace poe with 'caca' XD
Cousin: *reads caption* Congradulations! You caught a big 'caca'!... *busts up laughing*
Me: *laughing as well*
Sister: You guys are gross! *trying not to laugh*

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RollingGirl replied...
Jul. 3, 2013 at 4:32 pm

((This was the F.E.A.R one))
Me/Cousin: *watching my sister play F.E.A.R*
Me: Charlie~ Charlie~
Cousin: Who's Charlie? O.o
Me: ... Her! XD *points to sister*
Sister: Oh so now I'm Charlie? =_='
Me: *laughs* Yes! XD... *watching her break things in the game* *In a british accent like in the "Charlie bit me video"* Charlie! Charlie don't break things that aren't yours! I'll tell mom on you!!
Cousin: *laughing* (she laughs at anything XD)
Sister: Oh really? Your gonna tell m-
*Alma appears in game* (Alma is like a dead child that chases you around)
Sister: *screams bloody murder*
Me: Mommy!!! :D
Sister: *after Alma disappears* Oh, so she's our mother now? =_= *continues playing*
Me: Sure~ XD
Sister: Well tell mommy to not scare me next time! DX
Mom: *walks by* What'd I do? O.o
Sister: *laughs* Not you mommy. My other mommy.
Mom: O_o???

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WhereTheCitySleeps replied...
Jul. 6, 2013 at 10:19 pm

[My friend Olivia and I are discussing the newest Star Trek film, Star Trek: Into Darkness, and who we and our friends would resemble most out of the crew ]
 
Olivia: So Dustin would probably be Kirk, since he's, y'know, all crazy and stuff.
 
Me: Yeah, probably... Plus he talks a lot.
 
Olivia: Exactly. And I would be McCoy.
 
Me: Wait, what? I thought I was McCoy? You know how sarcastic and pessimistic I am...
 
Olivia: Nope. I'm McCoy. You're Spock, you idiot. Get it right.
 
Me: o_o What? Spock? But that doesn't even make sense!
 
Olivia: You mean my assumption isn't logical?
 
Me: Yes, it is highly illogi-- Ohoho, I see what you did there. Nice try.
 
Olivia: -_-

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FaeNotMyName replied...
Jul. 7, 2013 at 6:17 pm

Bro: We've both been through some s*** haven't we?

Me:...

Bro: You, especially.

Me: Yeah...

Bro: I mean, hell, I haven't even had braces!

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Jul. 7, 2013 at 7:25 pm

*at Safety Town, an event with kids 4-6*
Me: *sitting at my table with my group of kids* *does the Vulcan Salute*
Natalie (a 6 year old): O.O HOW DID YOU DO THAT!? *grabs my hand and turns it around* Where did your finger go?! Did you actually cut it off???
Gabby (another kid, I think she's 4): *does the Vulcan salute*
Natalie: WHAAAAT??

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The-Pervert-of-PT replied...
Jul. 7, 2013 at 7:37 pm

Me: *Sis's name*, say something O.O
Sis: Something.
Me: O.O
Sis: O.O
-long silence-
Sis: .............. my stomach feels bubbly.

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The-Pervert-of-PT replied...
Jul. 7, 2013 at 7:38 pm

Me: *Sis's name*, say something O.O
Sis: Something.
Me: O.O
Sis: O.O
-long silence-
Sis: ............... my stomach feels bubbly.

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The-Pervert-of-PT replied...
Jul. 7, 2013 at 7:39 pm

Me: *Sis's name*, say something O.O
Sis: Something.
Me: O.O
Sis: O.O
-long silence-
Sis: .. .... .... .. ... my stomach feels bubbly.

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The-Pervert-of-PT replied...
Jul. 7, 2013 at 7:39 pm

....... huh.

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Jul. 9, 2013 at 9:10 pm

Brother#4: *standing in front of the open fridge, messing with something* This is the best idea I've had all year.
 
Me: *walks around the fridge to see what he's doing* What?

 
Brother#4: *pouring chocolate syrup onto corn chip*
 
Me: ...
 
Brother#4: *sprinkles on basil*

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Jul. 22, 2013 at 2:48 pm

Mom and I: *at a place that sells a bunch of rocks and dirt and stuff*
Me: *sniffing the air* It smells funny here. Like that thing Natalie cooked once...I'm trying to remember what it was.
Mom: *looks at me funny* That's manure.
 
 
 
****
 
 
Sister #3: *tastes the fried rice Sister#2 made* It doesn't taste like much.
 
Sister #2: What's wrong with your tastebuds??
 
Me: I scraped them off with a razorblade while she was sleeping. She hasn't noticed yet.
 
Sister #3: *checks her tongue*

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Aug. 15, 2013 at 9:45 pm

These are what I like to call "clumsy ninja" moments.
 
Me: *falls down the stairs while carrying full cup of tea* *doesn't spill a drop*
 
* * *
 
Me: *taking a bag of flour out of a cupboard, hands full* *knocks ceramic bowl out of cupboard* *catches it....WITH MY ELBOW*

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Aug. 16, 2013 at 9:43 pm

O.O Cool! Lucky >_>. So... something "funny"...
 Me:*Sitting in armchair*
Belle (cat): *Tries to jump into my lap*
Me:No, not now Belle. *Puts her down*
Belle: *Jumps in my lap again*
Me:NO Belle.*Puts her down again*
Belle:*Stares at me, without binking, for five minutes. Jumps on back of chair.*
Belle:*Begins to purposely hit me on the back of my head*
Me:Belle STOP.*Slaps tail away*
Belle: *Sits up right, moves slightly, begins to hit me directly on top of my head*
Me: STOP BELLE.*Puts her down*
Belle:*Glares at me and swirls her tail*
Mom walks into room, sits on couch.
Belle leaps into her lap and smothers her with love, then sits quietly in her lap and glares at me.
Mom:...What happened while I was away?
Me:...

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b-ballplaya replied...
Aug. 17, 2013 at 8:34 am

Mom: How do you spell across? Brother: Two c's and one s Me: You don't know how to spell across? Mom: That doesn't look right. Brother: Sorry. It's one c and two s's Me: Now how do you spell gullible? Mom: You guys are mean! Okay, it's two c's and two s's Me: (face palm)

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