Well, I couldn't find our old thread... XD
If you are in Busting Through, do not read. Pretty please. Except for maybe Nacho. XD
Okay, so...if Quinten finds this diary after the maid drops it, or when he's exploring some room (either way, I think a maid will have to have kept it, probably because she was in love with the Commander or something like that and didn't want him to have it out of jealously...or because their mother wanted the maid to keep it safe, any reason you want!), we'll need to make it pretty subtle. Perhaps it could be some diary of their mother's?
I have an idea...but first, I need to clear up one small thing: Is Quinten's mother going to be a woman who had an affair with the Commander when he was seeing his second wife? If so, she could have been a maid herself, and the one who dropped the diary could have been a friend of hers keeping it safe after all this time. Or was the mother the actual second wife, only she had to keep it secret, as it might have been scandelous for the Commander to have a kid with someone else so soon after his first wife's death? I wasn't sure on that. >.<
Yes, I do agree that subtlety will be needed. I think it would be okay if Quentin maybe bumps into the maid and she drops it.
Hmmmm, I'm actually not sure. I left Quentin's past kinda hazy for this reason. All I have right now is he had a little sister, a bad relationship with his father, and all of them are dead, mother included.
I think maybe hiim being the product of an affair might not be a bad idea. The neck rubbing thing--which I hadn't even realized--could be something that was a trait he got from the Commander. He has the same green eyes as Keegan does, and he and Keegan's ages would be a little more explainable if the Commander had had an affair.
I'm thinking that when Jem and Keegan find out it shouldn't just be smooth sailing and all that. Their father had an affair, the woman had a son and disappeared with it. She married some years later somewhere in Europe and had Quentin's little sister. I feel like there should be resentment toward Quentin because of it?
Okay, so an affair with a maid? Keegan was seven when their father re-married, and how old did you make Quinten? Younger or older? Either way, with an affair, age relation wouldn't matter. The Commander still could have had another child when the first wife was still around, which would hit the boys harder, as their father would have cheated on their own mother.
No, it won't be smooth sailing, especially if it was with their own mother. o.O
As for the diary entries...I think they should be a mix of the mother describing the war, her social life, perhaps even when she began having problems with her husband, and how she suspected he was cheating, and how she evenually---GASP---caught him with the maid. That would give the maid reason to keep the journal, probably out of loyalty to her friend (Quinten's mother), and a need to keep the secret. Perhaps the first wife, Keegan's and the other's mothers, took pity on the maid. She could have either been preg.nant with Keegan and been sickly and known she was dying, or she could have been a year or two away from having Keegan and still be sickly. That might also help Keegan's guilt, if Quinten told him, so he could know it wasn't his fault his mother died in childbirth.
So many possibilities. XD
Hmmmmm well, I was actually thinking something a little different. I hope that's okay lol xD
Naturally, when Quentin arrives in his room, shouldn't he want to explore it? Not explicitly, but more like casually. Like checking out the closest briefly, opening the drawers of his dresser. And then, strangely enough, he can't close the drawer back. That's kind of annoying, so he takes it out and-BAM! An old tattered book falls out, revealing several passages with the according dates. For example...
I fear that a horrible outcome has been cast upon me. Guilt pours through my veins as I write this passage, and I think I may be losing my mind entirely. It really was an accident, you see. Bumbing Commander Hail--I can't bare to write down his first name--was the best thing that has ever happened to me. Of coarse he was a little gruff, after the tragic loss of his first love, but that is only normal. Except, that I am prègnant with his child. Right after he has been remarried! The self loathing I feel is startling. For me, a simple maid, to succumb to such horrible behavior? I hardly know myself at all. I must quit as soon as possible.
And then, further along the months, another passage such as...
It has been more difficult than I have imagined to resign from my position here at Fort London. The Commander seems adamant that I stay, and it is beginning to get harder to conceal my child. I can only think of it as mine anymore, for he does not know. I am seized with horror everytime I think of telling him. And yet, he still persists to be with me. If I can not resign normally, than I will simply leave without a word. He is a sick man to still be pursuing me, especially being a newly with four headstrong boys to raise. I need to get out of here as soon as possible, before it's too late. Quentin has a nice ring to it, don't you think?
And then Quentin's mother would of have to just had one that--escape--which lead her struggling to find Quentin's "father" before she fell in love with him, years pass, little sister is born, they all die, etc. What do you think? I'm still fine with him bumping into a maid, though I like the thought of a desperate woman just kind of stuffing her journal and forgetting about it in the stress of trying to get out of a socalled refuge. it makes their father more worse than he was, but oh well xD
I originally made Quentin 21, but right in the beginning when the RP started I changed it to 23 or 24.
Okay, so, if the diary is the Commander's wife's diary, how will it reveal to Quentin it was his mother who was having the affair with the Commander? He knows his mother, but the Commander's wife was the one writing the diary, so how will Quentin be able to tell it was his mother having the affair?
I am really confused right now, lol. So you said "...caught him with the maid. That would give the maid reason to keep the journal, probably out of loyalty to her friend (Quentin's mother), and a need to keep the secret."
Who's the second maid?
Ooooh, Nacho, I really like that, I like that a lot!
Oooooooh whoa idea overload! xD I was thinking of this in Quentin's mother's point of view, or rather, Giovanna, the random name I gave her lol.
Wouldn't that make sense? So Quentin would read his mother's thoughts and such?
Yes! I agree completely, Nacho!
I had the name Rochelle in mind for Quentin's mother. Or something like Rosalind.
GUYS, You won't believe this. Quentin is a Latin name, GUESS WHAT IT MEANS. "The fifth". That is the weirdest coincidence I have ever seen...
bumping for carson
Okay, so I hope I'm not too confused on this, but: The POV would be from Quinten's mother, who was a maid? How would she be involved with the base if not---as a soldier or citizen in the city? I like the idea of it being from the mother's POV, but the diary would definitely have to be kept by one of the maids; they would clean the rooms too thoroughly for it to have been left behind, stuffed somewhere.
There are a lot of coincidences here. o.O Ironic, how things turn out.
So--is it alright if we call Quentin's mother Rochelle? Just to make it easier? ^.^--should we say that Rochelle, a maid to Commander Kurtis Hail (Keegan, Jem and Quentin's father) had an affair with Kurtis shortly after the loss of Keegan's mother (which I named Diana. I reallyhope you don't mind all my naming o.o) Because then the plot would go like this...
Keegan's mother had just died. Commander Kurtis is stuck with grief, and the maid--Rochelle--bumps into him on a horrible time. they well ah...you know...and suddenly, Rochelle finds herself pr.e.g.na.nt. She can't let the secret get out--her journal seems to be her only friend--and she flees as soon as she can. Imagine it now--Rochelle packing quickly, going through drawers and such. Should the book perhaps been dropped on her way out, found my someone who wanted to read it....? Agh, I just don't know what to do with the book xD It has to seem reasonable...
Oh! Oh, how about this? She hid it under a floorboard? Would that be good? Since you know, maids don't really cheek under those...? :) Just throwing around ideas. I really liked the one about Keegan not being entirely responsible for his mother's death,though. :)
The only thing about her name being Rochelle is Dolphin's old character was named Rochelle from the first roleplay...right? The name rings a bell, but I may be mistaken after so many roleplays with you guys. I think it was...
Okay, everything sounds good---the mother being the Commander's maid, one thing leading to another in his grief, the diary, etc.---but you're right; it has to be reasonable. She would probably burn it if she wanted to leave it, so we can say she dropped it, and perhaps one of the other maids, who found the entire ordeal scandelous, hid the diary? My only thing would be how Quinten finds it if none of the others have been able to...
Mmm. But this is all coming together quite nicely, actually. Especially since this was nowhere near apart of the plan in the beginning RP. But it works so well! XD
I hadn't even seen that you both replied!!
Okay, so how is this. (And yes, Carson, you're correct, Dolphin did have a character named Rochelle, that's why I'm going to use Rosalind).
So, Rosalind, a maid to Commander Kurtis Hail, begins a sectret relationship with the grief stricken man who had just lost his wife Diana. Roslaind discovers that she is with child some months later, she confides in her diary her situation. She can't let he secret get out because it would look bad not only for her, but for the Commander.
Rosalind decides leaving is the best option. She hurridly packs her things, the diary resting on top, and flees the base. But as she is doing so the diary slips from her bag to fall in the hall, where a dear friend of Rosalind--another maid--find it and reads it. Discovering Rosalind and the Commander's secret, the maid hides the journal for Rosalinds sake so no one else could find it.
Knowing nobody would look in John's room she hides it in the dresser. Never thinking the room would get used again. And now, all these years later, Quentin finds the journal and reads it.
PERFECT. We had all these loose ends that just needed one swift tying-up, and now I think that's been accomplished. XD
Does this sound alright, Nacho? Anything to add? I've got nothing. :P
That sounds great! :D Great job guys since we all like collaborated together ^.^
I'm gonna post for Quentin real quick, tell me what you guys think! Oh, and Nacho, I'm totally stealing (with a little editing) you diary entries XD