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Nature Short Story Contest

AthenaMarisaDeterminedbyFate posted this thread...
Nov. 13, 2012 at 7:37 pm

Write a short story about something magical somewhere in nature. Or about something in nature. It has to be descriptive, and it has to be imaginitive. The character has to see something beautiful or dark, that may be real, but it can also be made up, or in the character's head. 
1st place: ratings and comments on three articles
2nd place: ratings and comments on two articles
3rd place: ratings and comments on one article
4th place: one comment (I find comments without ratings to be more valuable than ratings without comments)
Deadline is when I get 15 entries, though I'll take 10 in a pinch.
Ask me for any details or questions you might have! 

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guardianofthestars replied...
Nov. 13, 2012 at 10:52 pm

Will a story about Leaf tornadoes be okay? It's about a girl using them to represent her childhood and other stuff. They are constantly being talked about.

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Ethereal replied...
Nov. 14, 2012 at 12:36 pm

I have a story about the four seasons, but I'm not sure if it's what you're looking for. If it's not, I'll come up with something else.
The leaves quiver, shifting in the wake of the woman passing by.  The ground is covered in leaves, red, yellow, and orange, a fiery blanket of autumn, scattered along the ground.  It is chilly out, and the trees have all but lost their foliage.  The woman calls into the forest.
“I know you’re here, brother.”
She says in a warm, natural voice that also has a bitter tinge. 
“Yes I’m here. What do you want?”
A figure emerges silently from behind an especially bare tree.  He is thin, with snow-white hair and cold, icy blue eyes. His smile is more of an evil smirk; he looks nothing like his sister, who has a chocolate brown hair and a warm skin tone.  He is dressed in a fur coat, while she wears a robe of russet orange. 
“Winter is coming sooner than usual”
She says, gently, as if a mother chiding her small child.
“Oh, I thought you would say that.”
The cold looking man mumbles, a glum frown on his face.
“You know it is still my reign, brother, you know it is still September, you know the trees should be full of leaves, but look!”
She gestures up towards the frail, bare branches.
“This is your doing.”
She finishes, her voice still gentle, but her eyes convey a deeper meaning. Suddenly, another voice chimes in.
“If he gets winter early, does that mean I get spring early too?”
The shrill voice continues, and a young girl pops out of the underbrush.  There is a collective groan between the two others.
“Hey! Don’t be mad! I figured this was a meeting, so I should be present.”
She stated, with a dramatic stomp of her foot.  A daffodil grew where she had stepped.
“Oops... “
She murmurs, looking sheepishly about.  Both Winter and Autumn sigh.
“Spring, this is a private meeting! This is between Winter and me! “
Autumn explains, her voice slightly raised.
“Sorry... just to warn you though... I, I invited Summer too...”
Spring fiddles with her hair, pouting at the two older seasons. They groan again.  Summer was so annoying, everyone liked him, and he liked to wave his popularity in their faces.  It would be any second now; he would probably show up with his latest girlfriend.
“Yo wassup?”
Summer appears in a flash of light, emitting a wave of warmth that thoroughly annoyed winter.
“I heard someone call my name! Sorry I was late, I was going surfing down in Australia, y’know YOLO?”
He continues, making a “hang-loose” sign as spring giggles.
“You two are so immature. I might as well leave”
Winter grumbles, turning his back on autumn.
“And you can forget about your “trees full of leaves”! winter is coming, whether you like it or not.”
He calls back, disappearing in a flash of blue smoke.
“Thank you, Summer.”
Autumn says sarcastically, all hint of gentility disappearing from her voice.
“Okay, okay, I didn’t mean to do damage! Winter’s a Jerk anyway.”
Summer says, trying vainly to cover his tracks. It isn’t working.
“You both should go. Now!”
Autumn’s voice is now angry, her brown eyes burn as orange as the leaves beneath her. 
“Okay, alright, I’m sorry, peace out, but like YOLO!”
Summer disappears, and is quickly followed by a pouting spring. Autumn is left alone in the barren forest.  Her eyes cool back to brown. She stroked the nearest tree, breathing a contented sigh as red leaves once again spring from the branches.  Winter was not coming today. Autumn had a lot of work to do.

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Nov. 14, 2012 at 8:36 pm

I really love this! It has a wonderful element of magic to it! It's great.

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guardianofthestars replied...
Nov. 16, 2012 at 10:10 am

 When I was little, I always was fascinated by those leaf tornadoes. They spun the loose dirt and leaves in the air and across the ground for a few brief seconds before they dissolved into dust.  I loved to watch them as they swirled, seeming to dance.
     I used to think they were portals, gifts of escape, a route to bring me to a happier and more exciting place.  Worlds of dragons and fairies or ones with magic and where dreams come true were lying in wait for me just through that doorway. I used to chase those tornadoes, but the instant I stepped within its boundaries it evanesced into thousands of shattered pieces. It became an endless puzzle that I was hopeless at completing.
     As I’ve grown, I’ve chased fewer and fewer of those mystical leaf tornadoes.  Though every time I see one I pause and hold my breath as it sweeps by.  Now that I’m older I’m letting go of my childhood wonders and beliefs and they slip farther and farther away from the blissful past.  College overcomes my doll house, jobs surpass running barefoot on dew covered grass, ACTs and SATs defeat hide-n-seek and new friends shove my old imaginary ones aside.
      I’ve nearly pushed aside my old philosophy of my magical leaf tornadoes, but as I walk through my yard with my younger cousin my juvenile thoughts return as I remember the world through the eyes of a six year old.
       “Look!” She points excitedly ahead of us.
      My eyes dart the way she directs and my heart stops. Coming right at us is the tornado. My breath quickens as it hits its peak, it’s a large one, there’s no possible way it will miss us. I grab her hand and she squeezes mine as the wind starts to kick up around us.  Together we step forward just as it swallows us whole, finally embracing me and all of my possibilities unfold.

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Nov. 16, 2012 at 8:44 pm

Awesome :D

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AndriNeverDied replied...
Nov. 25, 2012 at 8:26 pm

Hanging Lake
   My breathing became heavy as I stepped up the rocks to my home. The air was slightly cold. I had been walking for a few miles and was almost there. Some places still had frozen ice covering the dirt, which made it even more diffucult. Finally I reached the top. The waterfall fell at amazing speed and crashed into the rocks. My home wasn't exactly a "home".
   It was around 3 thousand feet up, past the woods. There was a rock covering most of the ground in the clearing. At the front of it there was a beautiful waterfall. Another huge rock leaned against a rock wall next to the waterfall was were I slepped. Well, I actually slepped under it. Okay, so I wasn't that normal. 
   My parents moved up here after finding it. They fell in love with it and didn't want to leave. A while later I was born. I had a sister too, but she was killed by a hungry bear. Since I'm so agile, I climb up high in the rocks and hide in a small cave I found during the summer when the bears are out.
   As for my parents, they froze to death one winter. Burying their bodies wasn't such a thrill for me. I don't know how I manage, but I do. I find my own food then have to cook it myself. In the winter time I  sleep with extra blankets and a fire next to me.
   I notice how dark it's getting and I grab the blankets and head to bed.
  5 Months Later
   I sit at the fire gazing into it when I hear something. I look up and hear voices. Oh god no! I grab my supplies and climb up to my cave as fast as I can. 
   Over the next few weeks I observe people remodiling my home. Making paths and such. I silently cry. Later, more people come with bags and heavy jackets. No. They made a tourist attraction out of my home!
   I need food. As soon as I don't see anyone in sight I climb down and go hunting. After a while of no luck I hear someone yell, "HEY KID! KID!" I freeze. I didn't know what to do. The only people I've ever spoken to was mom, dad, and sis. 
   "You look like you could use some help. God your skinny boy! Here, eat this." I was handed a sticky brown bar. It smelled good so I stuffed it in my mouth. 
   I learned the woman's name was Ashley. She adopted me eventually. Living in a house felt wierd, but honestly it was better than the woods. 
   Every week since then, Ashley would take me one day out of the week back there. I would climb on all the rocks and sometimes she'd even let us camp there. I was still upset when I saw other kids climbing around my old home, and tourist smiling and taking pictures under my waterfall.

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Nov. 26, 2012 at 6:30 pm

New rule: anyone can submit two entries, but no more than two.

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Dec. 2, 2012 at 3:35 pm


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Dec. 10, 2012 at 7:15 pm

(Any more entries, anyone?)

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x_Demosthenes_x replied...
Dec. 10, 2012 at 10:34 pm

"That Little Sunset" The colors blended together in the sky; a mix of orange, red, and purple. It was as if an artist had sat down on this very field and painted the sky with a brush. Or so to say. It had been five years; five years since I first sat on this grass with dad and gazed at the fiery sea of color in the sky. Yes, indeed. Five years. Four years since he died. Three years since I ran away. Two years since I found this field again. One week since I began living here. Every evening I bring out a piece if paper and my easel that I store in the trunk if a tree. Then I sit; I sit and wait for the sun to get tired and sneak beneath the horizon. And I paint. I paint. I paint. I paint until the blended colors have faded into the navy blue sky, I paint until I see the twinkling stars in the night sky. Because the only thing left of dad is that little fire in the sky; that little fire I paint each and every day. That little sunset above that big horizon.

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Dec. 10, 2012 at 10:53 pm

Yaaay! Another entry! That was really good; I love your descriptions.

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Dec. 17, 2012 at 9:18 pm

Any more entries, guys? Please? if not, I'll post the results soon.

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Dec. 17, 2012 at 9:19 pm

Can you tell I'm impatient?

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guardianofthestars replied...
Dec. 17, 2012 at 10:04 pm

Haha. It is hard waiting for posts! But you might want to wait until after Christmas break. More people might enter because they have more free time to write with school letting out.

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Dec. 18, 2012 at 8:29 am

I'm going to change it so that people can enter up to two stories instead of one, and then I'll wait until after the holidays.

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Dec. 23, 2012 at 12:18 pm

Any more entries, please?

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Dec. 24, 2012 at 5:50 pm

ARGH! Someone please enter! I'm so impatient!

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Jan. 19, 2013 at 8:10 pm

Okay, I haven't had new entries in forever, so I will close this contest now.
1st place: Four Seasons by Ethereal (who is now 24601)
2nd place: Leaf Tornadoes by guardianofthestars
3rd place: Hanging Lake by AndriNeverDied
4th place: The Little Sunset by Demosthenes
All the entries were incredible. Please tell me what you want me to rate and comment on.

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guardianofthestars replied...
Jan. 21, 2013 at 10:37 am

Yay!! I got a prize:D  Congrats everyone else on winning!!!  Athena, could you read "Get Back Up Again" and comment/rate "Glass Slipper" one my page? Thanks again!! :)

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