I was just wondering how the members out there who are atheists/agnostic and date people who are religious or vice versa (there have to be at least a few of you out there) deal with the, erm, "faith gap" there. I've thought about it, and I feel like it would be very hard to really make a relationship work in the long run. I mean, what if you get married and have kids? What do they believe? If they're religious and you're not, how do you tell them that you don't believe in a God? Won't they judge you and not really respect you after that if they're indoctrinated really heavily?
It's just stuff like this. How do you guys make it work?
Well, I can't speak for those who don't believe in God, but as a Christian (a Seventh-day Adventist, to be exact), I can speak for those who are religious.
Personally, I would never date someone who wasn't an Adventist or who I couldn't convert somehow. XD
Which is why it is unfortunate that I have major crush on the most Catholic guy imaginable. :P
I don't believe that a marriage can be very succesful if both partners don't share similar beliefs and values. Especially if they're going to be raising kids.
As it says in 2 Corinthians 6:14, "Be ye not unequally yoked together with unbelievers: for what fellowship hath righteousness with unrighteousness? and what communion hath light with darkness?"
Also, you said...
"If they're religious and you're not, how do you tell them that you don't believe in a God? Won't they judge you and not really respect you after that if they're indoctrinated really heavily?"
First of all, I'd like to ask what you meant by "indoctrinated really heavily" before I jump to any conclusions...
Secondly, I can't speak for all religions, but I know that a person would be a very bad Christian if they were to "judge you and not really respect you" just because you don't believe in God.
The Bible teaches us not to judge others and to love everyone. I respect people based on much more than whether or not they are following God. A person's walk with God is personal, and I would never disrespect someone just because they maybe aren't there yet or are struggling with their faith.
I just wanted to make that clear.
Anyways, hopefully this helped somewhat. :)
God bless. ♥
I agree with half.note except I'm not adventist.
I agree with the wisdom in the "unequally yolked" verse. No matter how much you love that person, you're going to have a diificult time in a relationship if the fundamental way you view the world is radically different than theirs.
That being said, crazier things have worked out.
And I'm just here like "I'm a UU bro, I dun care, #yolo" XD Seriously though, in my worldview I'm fine with whatever. Obviously though if you two are on the exact opposite sides of the spectrum, things may be kinda shaky, but if the two of you are somewhat moderate with your views, then things would work out in my opinion. My dad for example is agnostic with somewhat atheistic tendencies, while my mom is a definite God believer, and they have like the best relationship ever :D
I'm sure its possible, but probably not super common, particularly if you have a strongly religious person in the mix. I tried and unfortunately failed to have a relationship with a very christian girl, so as far as anecdotes are useful in answering these things...the faith gap proved to be an issue.
the trouble is, when two people who have different religious opinions marry, they often end up just not deciding how to raise their kids, and the kids are atheist. or at least not introduced to a religion. i guess that's great if you're the atheist/agnostic parent. the question really is, if you're atheist/agnostic, are you willing to have your children raised in a religious way? because obviously someone is going to have to give in, and it probably(not necessarily, but probably) will be the person who doesn't care about religion, as opposed to the person who does care. just my thoughts.
I think that it would be possible for a couple of different beliefs to raise children together. You just have to hae some respect for the children themselves and explain to them, from a young age the differences between mommy and daddy's ( or mommy and mommy, or daddy and daddy, whatever) beliefs. Actually, I think this would give these kids an advantage over their peers. They will have a better perspective on the world and be more willing to embrace cultural and spiritual diversity which is always a good thing. And they can come to their own conclusions on matters of personal faith
Eh... Well. Religious folks, anyone that follows the Bible. God teaches us to follow all of his commandments. And no, not just the Ten, but some others too, like impressing your faith on your children.
It is actually expected of believers to teach our children that God is the way and the truth and the light. So... No compromise is supposed to be made in the first place. And going back to half.note's Corinthians verse up there, believers aren't even supposed to be in relationships with those who don't call God their Lord and Savior.
In His eyes, there is no compromise. The couple has to be on one page.
Actually BrightBurning, I'm don't think it would give children an advantage over their peers. Whereas their peers would know what they believe and why they believe it (hopefully parents together teach this), the child of parents with split views would be getting two different stories from a very young age and end up confused for the first half of their childhood and then end up taking sides in the later half, which could also drive a wedge between the parents.
Personally, I wouldn't date someone who was atheist/agnostic if I could help it, being a Christian myself, but if that did happen, hopefully i wouldn't judge him, because Christians shouldn't judge to begin with. If I ended up dating or even marrying somone atheist/agnostic, I would pray that he comes to Christ. Of course, i hopefully would not make that the goal of the relationship, because then it wouldn't be a relationship at all. I hope I have been helpful! :)
I agree with half.note as well, and with Mr.packerbear12. Christians are taught to love others no matter what, because that's what Jesus did for us.